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Lack of Sex after being separated for 14 months?
Hi Everyone,
I am a new member and just got on line reading and discovered that my problem isn't so uncommon. My husband and I were separated for 14 months, not due to choice but my husband had to wait on his Visa to become available in Mexico. Now that he has been back home since Dec 5th,2007, we have only had sex 2 times. Before he left we used to be intimate at least 2-3 times per week, it's him not me? I am so sexually frustrated and at a loss as to why. He works alot, 6 days per week, and he has major back problems, but he had this before, so nothing new. My husband is extremely good looking and is 25 yrs my junior, we are both attractive and of normal weight people, and now I am worried he is no longer attracted to me? He is always looking at other women when we are together and commenting "do you think she is cute" in the stores and on TV. He no longer even comments when I dress up and look extra special?
Recently around Valentines day I found a note tucked inside the outside cover of a CD in his SUV written in Spanish to My Mi Amour S_______, I am glad we met and I hope we remain together! He denied this as he was writing it from a song in the CD and put his name, but it wasn't his handwriting? I approached him about it,,,,in his small printing on the top in black ink he had dated it 2/14/08, but the print was in Silver ink/very cursive and frilly, unsigned? I am not stupid, as fear he is cheating on me! he is usually home each night by 6:00pm, but no affection at all, he does kiss me hello, and bye, but nothing else. When I have approached him about the note he laughes and tells me he wrote it and I am nuts, he isn't cheating......right,,,now I have no trust in him! How do I break this madness and really find out or am able to communicate with him, I cannot keep living like this, I am so unhappy and sad! I have tried so many times to discuss sex, the lack of it with him and he keeps changing the subject....also he is constantly texting on his cell phone and takes it everywhere with him, even when he is in the bathroom, and keeps it in his pocket. He texts alot as soon as he gets home from work in Spanish, so I really have nothing to defend myself with, as I don't speak nor read Spanish!
mamacita911
I am a new member and just got on line reading and discovered that my problem isn't so uncommon. My husband and I were separated for 14 months, not due to choice but my husband had to wait on his Visa to become available in Mexico. Now that he has been back home since Dec 5th,2007, we have only had sex 2 times. Before he left we used to be intimate at least 2-3 times per week, it's him not me? I am so sexually frustrated and at a loss as to why. He works alot, 6 days per week, and he has major back problems, but he had this before, so nothing new. My husband is extremely good looking and is 25 yrs my junior, we are both attractive and of normal weight people, and now I am worried he is no longer attracted to me? He is always looking at other women when we are together and commenting "do you think she is cute" in the stores and on TV. He no longer even comments when I dress up and look extra special?
Recently around Valentines day I found a note tucked inside the outside cover of a CD in his SUV written in Spanish to My Mi Amour S_______, I am glad we met and I hope we remain together! He denied this as he was writing it from a song in the CD and put his name, but it wasn't his handwriting? I approached him about it,,,,in his small printing on the top in black ink he had dated it 2/14/08, but the print was in Silver ink/very cursive and frilly, unsigned? I am not stupid, as fear he is cheating on me! he is usually home each night by 6:00pm, but no affection at all, he does kiss me hello, and bye, but nothing else. When I have approached him about the note he laughes and tells me he wrote it and I am nuts, he isn't cheating......right,,,now I have no trust in him! How do I break this madness and really find out or am able to communicate with him, I cannot keep living like this, I am so unhappy and sad! I have tried so many times to discuss sex, the lack of it with him and he keeps changing the subject....also he is constantly texting on his cell phone and takes it everywhere with him, even when he is in the bathroom, and keeps it in his pocket. He texts alot as soon as he gets home from work in Spanish, so I really have nothing to defend myself with, as I don't speak nor read Spanish!
mamacita911
I'm sorry to say it but you know what's going on, right? Do you really love him enough to put up with this kinda disrespect? If it were me I would bow out gracefully and move on---lesson learned. Good luck to you.
mama, I just read your post again. Honestly, it sounds like he married you for citizenship. Consider that very carefully.
Mamacita, it sounds like the age difference has caught up with him. He's a young man, and he's looking for a young woman. You aren't it.
Why are you interested in some guy so young?
I can't even imagine it. My son and his friends are 25 years younger than I am. As physically beautiful as they are, they are like children. B O R I N G.
You're like his mother. Find a man your own age and it might work out better.
Why are you interested in some guy so young?
I can't even imagine it. My son and his friends are 25 years younger than I am. As physically beautiful as they are, they are like children. B O R I N G.
You're like his mother. Find a man your own age and it might work out better.
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