Husband abandonment

[IRC73]

My husband recently left the home that he owns and moved to his own apartment.  He told me this on the day that he was packing, that he does not want to live with me anymore because we have nothing in common. We didn't have any fights within the past month or so.  This just came on all of a sudden.  He'd say that he wants to move out of here because the mortgage is too high, but when I asked, what do you mean, u want to move out by yourself?  He would say...yea, that is a possibility.  And when I wanted to know more, as to why? what are you talking about?
He just didn't want to talk.
Then all of a sudden.  Boom. He's moving out.
So then I find out that he is also going on a two week vacation to some place overseas.
My question is... how do I find out how many people are going on that trip?
Because he says that he is going by himself, but I do not believe him.
If I contact his travel agent, do you think they will be willing to tell me without his permission?
I am still his wife legally.

Thanks!

[alexplusone]

I agree with rockrose. Protect yourself. It may feel selfish or silly now but if he is going overseas for vacation for 2 weeks I don't imagine it is a solo vacation or that it's an inexpensive one. No one leaves a marriage without a reason, but when they leave without explanation or warning,  usually there is a third party involved. I don't think the third party is your high mortgage. I am so sorry, best wishes

[RockRose]

IRC,  before you even mentioned the trip it seemed pretty clear to me he has a woman.  (Or a man,  that happens).  

Men don't leave marriages without much warning because the "mortgage is too high".

You need to contact a lawyer RIGHT AWAY to protect your assets before he bleeds all the accounts dry or transfers them somewhere else.

Best wishes.

[specialmom]

ugh.  Double ugh.  Okay . . . triple ugh.  I'm sorry you are going through this.  Sounds very difficult.  I can certainly understand wanting to know the 'full' story because your radar says somethig is going on besides just what he is telling you.  I couldn't say for sure----  but my radar is going off as well.

I agree that the travel agency probably will not give you information before his trip.  I don't know what laws/rules about privacy that they have.

If you found out he was traveling with a woman, would this change things for you?  He is, unfortunately, telling you he wants to leave.  He is being a bit sketchy with the details as to why but the message is the same.  I know that hurts and stinks.  I think in a divorce, if someone has been unfaithful, that is your grounds for divorce.  I don't know if that matters to you or not.  

So, I think that I'd go to his apartment as cheshchesh says and say "look.  I think it is the right and fair thing for you to do to be honest with me.  I'm a big girl and have been your wife, so I deserve honesty.  If there is another woman, you need to tell me that."  

By the way, are you now stuck with this too high of mortgage to pay all by yourself?  Ugh.

I'm so sorry.  Stay strong.

[cheshchesh819]

Never mind the holiday the question here is is your marriage over?whilst i know you want to find out about the holiday i dont think they will pass this information on to you,but your husband should have the descency to discuss what has happen for this marriage to break down i would go to in apartment and demand answers,dont be left in limbo.