Real love in the 21st century?

[moonknight]

hello med help well by looking at other posts here my question is nothing but since i'm only young once here it goes.....
I'am a 18 year boy in middle class (who is majoring in criminal justice and loving sociologically) growing up which some of the older generations might say is slowing getting more ****** up each day but any way i have never had a girlfriend nor didn't care of having one until this year when all of a sudden i can't stop thinking about there might someone who would like me for being who i was born to be well i was unfortunately born into a family who grew up from not having **** to having the american dream of a house cars kids and even a dog. now being one of there kids ever since middle school they have alway always told me and my older not to ******** anything and give your all. we have been doing that all these years but.... they have no idea what we have to go through these days. When middle school started my best friends turned into insecure **** talking assholes who would talk about porn video games all day. Well just trying trying to fit in with my pals i started doing what the say and well my parents didn't like that. I knew inside that they changed but  i was shy and didn't want to be alone. when high school came hormones was in the air and boy people were horny. Knowing that my old pals were going there i wanted to make new friends with me being shy i had a hard time but somehow manged any way junior year girls started to look pretty to me and wanted to find out how relationships work on a days so i started listening to side conversations that happen while i was working. What i found out that alot of couples relationships were soooo stupid it wasn't funny. Yet i saw people making out left and right  acting tough around their girlfriends like you see in today's movies.....

So med help here my question should i keep acting who i am a honest hard working nice guy who was raised to appreciate everything we have and to look things in reality not just by what people say because by using my observation skills during high school i don't think girls are into that at all at least what i see with there constant pic of their boyfriends and them saying that their in love and stuff. to this day i'am mad at my parents for rising me the way they did.

P.S. i am not an evil cold hearted person never  was, sure maybe spoiled rotten as a little kid but now i see reality of how fun paying the bills in the future will be woo hoo.... while watching all the good looking people who have money  along with hot  girls are having the time of their lives like or exactly like those college movies.
Well i would like for any one's opinion really I know there is alot of wayyyyyyy more jacked up problems in here (i looked before even typing this) but even though i go to a therapist  i want  the public perspective  would  be  cool  if  anyone would respond  to  this.
If you respond  to this thanks :)

[moonknight]

ok ill try my best :)

[elvy66]

You sound like a normal young man, I have a son your age and he is shy and quiet and his is a little different. He refuses to change to fit in and he loves it. The friends he has made are true friends and he has had a couple of girlfriends. However he is a virgin because he doesn't want to be one of those guys who uses women for their own pleasure.

The fact that you are asking this question tells me that you are not happy with playing someone else. I say always be yourself and please do not look at yourself as spoil and cold hearted. This is a horrible time your everyone going from teens and adulthood and you will be fine if you are yourself. You do not want to act like something your note, you want people to remember you as you.
You will be fine and remember you are 18, please do not take things to seriously, have some fun and always work on being better person. Good luck.

[Londres70]

Sorry, but your post was a bit rambling, however, this is what I got out of it......should you be yourself OR become something that society/peers expect you to be.  

My answer....I don't think you should be too worried about what others have and what they are doing.  I believe this is a major mistake both young and old people make.  Focus on you and your life.  

Sounds like the therapy is appropriate here; for your situation.

[RockRose]

So you're on prozac for anxiety and depression.

But there's something else that I'm strongly sensing from your posts - an overwhelming feeling of not belonging.  Do your siblings feel the same way?

From what I gather,  your family comes from poverty but was able to climb out of it and your parents strongly stressed trying hard to succeed at life and not make any mistakes that would mess it up or bring shame on the family.  In my observation that's really not that atypical - I've seen lots of families struggle and succeed and impress very hard on their children that they need to not mess up their opportunities in life.

So I'm curious about your siblings and if they feel as out of place as you seem to feel.

Also,  I wonder if you could get good physical exercise in biking or swimming?
Best wishes.

[moonknight]

So missmyAngel you say that even though my hormones won't shut the hell up that  i should continue being who iam  ignore outside influences like the media and  dumb people. i know im different......  i know  i think different than an average  person age; only because i was born  in unique kind family.  i hate it  to this day,  but  i can't help myself.  
i know  that  this posting is plain dumb compared to god awful other  postings  but  i just wanted to use  the internet as a tool.

[moonknight]

well since freshman year  i was really depressed  and eventually turned  into anxiey then back  to depression. so  im on prozac yeaa.... but running long distance and krav maga were a major help of keeping happy but  got a stress fracture from it and me being stubborn would do calf raises like crazy so i can get back asap. Unfortunately that caused another fracture on my other bone on the same leg have not done anything intense since then.

[MissmyAngel]

In my experience, during highchool I went for the bad boys, the really hot guys.
In the end I would always get hurt by them.
I have now been with an average looking "nice guy" for almost 11 years :)
When they say "nice guys finish last", thats not necessarily a bad thing :)
Because they are usually the ones that girls stay with.
Highschool is full of hormones, and sure these people look like they're happy and in love, when their making out on the street corner (and everywhere else lol) but when the passion and hormones die down, (as it always does) doesn't mean there was anything "real" there, or that they are compatible with each other.
I'm not saying high school sweethearts don't happen, because it does, but more often when the smokescreen dies down that the hormones bring, they find they weren't compatible at all.
I was best friends with my fiance for over a year before we started dating, so we knew each other well, and knew there was something there.

[RockRose]

Specifically,  why are you seeing a therapist?   It's a little hard to understand what you're describing in your post and I'm wondering if you have a diagnosis?