Reluctance after marriage

[Kelmor955]

I have been married for two years, but been with my Husband for a little over 3 years.  My husband was a virgin before he was with me, and I was not.  In fact I had quite a sexual past, and I am not happy about it.  Recently my husband brought up to me that he sometimes feels trapped in our marriage and that he regrets not having sex before me. Since our relationship was the first 'real' one he has had, I guess he feels he 'missed' out on some experiences.  We didn't really plan our marriage, and he in fact told me that before we got married that he didn't feel like he was completely ready.  I did not pressure him into anything.  I know that he loves me deeply, but sometimes there is this emotional dissconnect.  I guess I really don't know what I am supposed to do with this information...please advise

[Judy246]

Hi, a little concern at his comment of feeling trap in marriage, regret on the lack of sexual experience and feeling. All these are "red flag" of trouble ahead. "I recommend that you speak with him and suggest a marriage counselor to be able to sort out some of the issues within your marriage or a priest.  I also recommend individual counseling for him to sort out what is going on inside. Good Luck,

[iam1butterfly]

People occasionally feel "trapped" in their relationships... regardless of past or lack of past experiences. Perhaps, his feelings of regret are more about present issues than
of the proverbial "road not taken." And, this "trapped" feeling might reflect a transitional phase that he's going through, right now. Consider marriage counseling... it just might help to restore that connection.

[mami1323]

I think even if they aren't young, he will still feel like he's missed out on something.  Which inevitably could lead to a separation at some point or maybe him being unfaithful.  He probably has the mentality that the grass is greener.  If this is how he's feeling now than I don't see much change to that as time passes and that desire to experience other woman will increase.  I don't know what advice to give other than perhaps seeking counseling so he can work on these issues or him going alone so he can work through them on his own.

[Kelmor955]

Our ages are 28 and 27

[jo929]

you do not give your ages, if he is young he will probably want to have a sex life outside of marriage, to see if he did the right thing i wish that i could tell you what to do, but  all i can say is whatever will be will be  luck  jo