Thinking of getting Married, Need Advice

[ni07]

So my boyfriend and i have currently been talking about marriage, and im dying to marry him i love him so much and i know he feels the same,we have had our rough patches and we are very young, we arent in the best situation to get married and i know that, but the way i feel for him its just like i never want to be without him. anyways what i need to know, is what you guys think about my situation and if we should get married like we are talking about, We are both very young im 19 and hes 18, we have been together for about 3years maybe a little more then that. neither of us have jobs please i'd really like to know what you think about the situation

[Isabelle1963]

So what are your plans as far as your living arrangements?  Are you both going to move in with Mom & Dad or his Mom & Dad?  getting married is fun.  all the excitement and the hoopla of the event.  It's one big party that features you both.  However, that lasts one day and maybe a couple more [with video].  then what do you have? bills bills bills!

Get a job, if you don't want an education, then don't plan to live too high.  Figure on having only one car due to gas and insurance and maintenance costs.  Plan on a low income housing unit because factory or other blue collar jobs that don't require education won't pay as well as jobs that require education.  If you can wrap your thoughts and plans around that, no problem.

However, the alternative is this.  Go to school, get a student loan to put you through, plan on your future together, get a part time job while you're in school so that you'll have some independent money and won't have to mooch off of the parents, and plan on having a great wedding and life together as well as a good home that you can invite people over to see.

plan for your life. Not a wedding.  a wedding ceremony lasts about 30 min tops and then the afterward is what you have.  If you have nothing to look forward to except love, you're going to be disillusioned.

Hope for the best
Isabelle

[jo929]

My comment would be to get a good education, then a job,, and yes you are both way to young to think of marriage, How do you think you are going to live without working life is not one big party.. and gettiing married, remember that is for life sit back, slow down, and use your brain. you have a long life ahead of you,so look before you leap.  jo

[rebbecca]

i wish u two the best. but i do think they you should get ur lives together before u get married!

[RockRose]

Does Illinois allow same sex marriages?  I don't think so.  

What do you have to lose with some social ceremony declaring your commitment to each other?  It's not enforceable with the courts,  if you want to do that as a declaration of your love,  do it.

I'm kind of curious how you two adult men don't have jobs, but I guess that's your issue.