confused

[Froglover08]

hello everyone,
im in a bind. i dont know what is going on in my relationship and i dont know what to do. im looking for some advice. me and my boyfriend have been together for about 8 months. we have spent a ton of time together and these past months have been nothing but fighting and annoyance. we decieded to just not see each other for a week and see what happens. i work and stay at home the whole week and he goes out every night and completly ignores me it seems like. i was going to spend friday and saturday night will him considering we havnt seen each other all week. when it came to planning it out he says well i might be doing something but i dont know we will probably be hanging out. i was so anrgy when he said this. is it normal for me to be mad?? i feel like im just his back up plan..... i tried to explain it but he doesnt understand. he does stuff all the time that it seems obvious that i would be mad about. now its like everytime i get off the phone i cry for one reason or another.. i really dont know how to handle this or what to do. i love him alot and he truly can be a great guy but everything is starting to go down hill. is there anything i can do to make myself not get mad about the things he feels i shouldnt be mad about? how do i just stay happy?
thank you!!!!!

[babypooh]

Maybe he's acting that way because he's upset. People react differently to different situations. Try going out with friends to distract yourself, but you should still talk to him. Ask him to be truthful and if he misses you. Ask him if he enjoys the single life and would rather go out than have an opportunity to speak with you and see how you're doing after not seeing you for a few days. His answers might help you decide what to do. Good luck. If he's not for you, then better leave him now. If he's willing to work it out and be honest about his feelings, great!

[mami1323]

I believe I answered your post before about why you get so mad at him.  I think it's the same thing.  You will most likely always be a back up plan for him.   Perhaps he's not the one for you.  You need a man who will put you first and if he's unable to do that then he's not as interested in the relationship as you are.  I told you before I had been in a similar type of relationship that lasted 2 1/2 years.  It was a waste of my time.  I was always shorted and left to felt unloved, lonely and extremely unhappy for the entire relationship.  Begging for this man's time and attention.  All it did was exhaust me but I eventually realized that I deserved better then that.  In the end, I broke his heart but he knew he couldn't give me what I wanted.  I think you need to focus on yourself and stop giving this man so much of yourself.  He hasn't done anything to deserve it.

[Lonelymom]

Call some girlfriends and go out!! Or get dressed up and go out by yourself. Have fun without him. Go to the mall or do whatever it is you enjoy to do and regain yourself. Find yourself and then maybe you can then find the relationship again.

Being mad about him not caring for you is normal. Does make you feel as if you are wasting time and energy on someone who doesn't care. Stop wasting that time and starting loving yourself.