2nd opinion of moles after years of not seeing a dermatologist

[NadiaF]

I recently went to the dermatologist to have my moles examined.  After 2 or 3 mins she gave me the all clear and said nothing to worry about and everything was fine.  This was the very first time I had a full body mole check.  Im almost 29 yrs.

I had noticed 3 moles change over time, particularly during my 2 pregnancies.  I have approx. 30 moles altogether.  I'm half asian.  These had always caught my attention as they always looked like spots of dirt.  They changed so slowly that i supposed they looked the same until i paid close attention to them only 2 weeks ago, which made me get my checkup.

They have all the signs of a melanoma, ABCE.  However she only asked to keep an eye on 2 very small black freckles.

Ive had a number of sunburns in my teens and early 20's, as well as a handful of tanning bed sessions in my life (regrettably).  It wasn't until 24 that i woke up and went cold turkey with tanning.  Afterwards babies came along and you know how it goes.  So I deeply regret now not having seen a derma much earlier.

SO my anxiety hangs on whether she could've missed a late stage melanoma.  Would i have had symptoms by now?  Why didn't she insist on a biopsy to be sure?  My husband insists to just listen to the professionals.  However it didn't sit well with me and in this past week i've read so much information and stories on melanoma.  It's detracting much of my attention away from normal life.  

I have made another appointment, a different dermatologist who i can't see for another 3 weeks!  I can't understand how people slowly develop melanoma in their 50's, 60's and 70's having spent all their days in the sun.  And others developing this in their teens and 20's, all of a sudden, it becoming fatal.  To be honest i don't know whether to be confident in my first examination and not to think much else of it for another 6 months, or question her conclusions.

Please for my sanity (and my husbands nerves), your professional insight would be very much appreciated!

Thank you

[NadiaF]

Thank you so much for your response Pum.
I had my last child almost 8 months ago.  I can say with absolute certainty that this last week has truly overwhelmed me, taking a diversion away from normal day to day life and yes I agree triggered by my own anxiety.

I guess what happened was my husband and I decided to get our full health checks, (you know how it is after kids, these things can be left on the back burner for some time).  Especially wanting to be healthy for our children.  It took me aback having seen these moles after such a long time, then reading up on skin checks, cancer, melanoma etc.  I felt foolish having not seen a dermatologist earlier, and so it continues.  I'm sort of that way with health issues. I'm usually very diligent, that's why my anxiety was overshot thinking that i possibly could have missed something big that could have been preventable.

Well i have my second opinion in 3 weeks.  Your post helped me very much!  I will focus on the present!

Thank you!

[Pum]

You already have an advantage in that you are not blue eyed an fair skinned (I assume, being half asian) and possibly your dermatologist took that into account.
I also had some of my moles change during pregnancy. That's completely normal. If you look closely you might even see them change with your cycle (mine do).
I agree with your husband that you should trust the expert that has examined you. There really isn't anything to be gained in doubting them.
How long ago did you have your last child? I only ask because worrying about late stage melanoma and that it is affecting your normal life may be a sign you are a bit anxious. Sometimes post partum depression can manifest that way. Of course plain old vanilla anxiety/depression can also come along anytime.
Get a second opinion if you need to but no more after that. They will only biopsy things they are not 100% sure about so the fact you had no biopsies is a good thing not a bad.

Hope you are sleeping and eating well and enjoying your family.

Take care.