SOS - 20 years of insomnia - tried EVERYTHING

[plasticjoe]

I have been suffering from insomnia for nearly 20 years. I have seen a nerologist, 3 hypnotherapists, several psychologists, psychiatrists and GP's, acupuncture, every possible herbal meds, homeopaths, past life regression, reiki, as well as 2 sleep studies at a hospital, etc. According to all these specialists I am perfectly healthy 'a fine specimen'... I exercise regularly during the day, eat healthy, don't drink etc. I am not overweight or too thin. For almost a year I stopped smoking, drinking coffee etc, etc.
The only stuff that work for me are certain anti-depressants and anti-anxiety pills,, although I still feel tired and disinterested in what's going on around me. Sleeping pills only help to knock me out, but they don't keep me down. I'd prefer to get off all meds completely.
I go to bed at +- the usual time and sleep with a fan, aircon and a low-noise bar-fridge in my room - so ample white noise, although I live in a quiet building, i.e. no noise at all.
I read before I go to bed to relax.
My job is relatively stress-free and I do not have any personal issues I am aware off. I have also seen various spiritual people about his.
My disorder varies: sometimes I cannot fall asleep at all, not even for 10 minutes. At other times I wake up after a couple of hours and remain alert/awake. At other times I get 5-6 hours, but I do not feel rested at all and have dark rings around my eyes, so that my colleugues will ask if I have been out all night.
I fall asleep in meetings (embarrassing) and while driving, or sometimes when watching TV, but wake up a few minutes later. I wrote off my car once when I fell asleep.
I am not able to maintain long-term relationships because of this (cannot sleep in the same bed and when they move, I wake up). I am a light sleeper when Ido sleep.
I can go on and on.

Can anybody give any advice, other than don' watch TV before bed, drink warm milk, etc.? PLEASE HELP

[KatEyes]

I am appreciative of the mind-body connection and think that a whole lot of medication side effects could be avoided if we went back to some of the basics of old instead of every new drug that comes along. As you stated, every option isn't effective for every person. For the person who does not have an issue needing immediate intervention, there is nothing to lose and everything to gain by pursuing practices that truly promote that mind-body connection.

Insomnia is such an umbrella term, so I'm thinking it depends on the cause what will work. Unfortunately there will likely be trial and error to find that out. In the case of obstructive sleep apnea causing sleep irregularities, I am grateful that the effective treatment is natural - it's air! I also have Periodic Limb Movement Disorder, and I can see where some of what you mention could be helpful. Curative? Can't say I have that same confidence, but I have found several pharmaceuticals to not be a good choice for me. Anything we can do to help ourselves function at an optimal level can only help. The longer I live the more I'm aware that there is so much to be learned from the experiences of others. Thank you for sharing yours.

[Dalubaba]

I am really happy to receive a positive response to my message. Yes, it is quite surprising to have thought of Vipassana almost simultaneously. I attended Vipassana camp at Indore (India) Mr. Goenka himself (founder) conducted the camp. Second time I attended the camp in 1991. Technique is simple which can be learnt in 5 minutes by any one. Important thing is practice. When you practice 10 to 12 hours a day, you come to know that you have potential to do it. And you may take up the meditation seriously. Second thing I came to learn that all meditation culminate in observing the observer (witnessing- Vipassana)

Another memorable person was Osho (Achary Rajnish) who established Rajnishpuram at USA. He had to leave USA because some fraud by his disciples. He was the best in presenting 108 meditations. In fact I became spiritual because of his lectures. I attended two camps conducted by him at Mount Abu (India) If he was alive and had not left India for USA, I would have become his desiple (Sanysi) Osho Internation foundation is world wide. His lectures are published into 400 books and in many languages. He has spoken on all religions.
I am 80. And still going on, in searching and practicing something new. Yoga is my hobby. I do not claim any achievement. But I will continue the search. It is believed that one cannot do mediation: one can concentrate and meditaion happens by itself if it has to happen. I think the search is more interesting than achieving. Or we can say that Journeying is arriving. Sorry for the long post. I will be happy to continue dialogue if you desire. I have done Reikhi also. I will write my experience sometime. Thanks

[plasticjoe]

Thank you for your message. I have really given up on a medical solution. I have tried yoga, and although it relaxes me, it does not help me with sleep. I tried Suseonjae (Korean) meditation, but that did not help.
It is interesting that you have mentioned Vipassana. I book myself on a course last October here in Thailand, but cancelled because I would not be able to take my medication. However, next year April I will get a 6-week holiday, and intend to go then. Perhaps this will help. As you have said rightly, it is the quality of sleep and not quantity.
I have not heard of yog nidra, but will certainly look it up.
Thank you kindly for trying to assist me. I believe in symbols - the fact that you have mentioned Vipassana.
Take care

[Dalubaba]

Discussion with kateyes is above average. So I am hesitant to participate in the discussion. However, as I am also a sufferer since last 60 years.(I am 80). I am doing yoga since my childhood with gaps in between. I have done most of the alternative therapy. None has helped me in sleep disorder. we do not have sleep clinic, so we have to depend on psychiatrist and general MDs.
I wonder whether you know about yog nidra (divine sleep).It did not help me but it may help you.
It is claimed that 20 minutes yog nidra is equivalent to 4 hours sleep.Many odeo tapes are available for yog nidra.Once i attended a vipassana meditation camp (10 days) we were doing 10 to 12 hours meditation.I coud not sleep for all the 10 days. when i asked our teache about this problem, he said it is ok If you do not feel tired in the day time.So if we concentrate on relaxation, lack of sleep will not affect us much. Please excuse me for my tardy reply. Sleep disorder is my problem NO:1. I explore internet for some guidance. This is my feeble attempt to participate in highly intellectual discussion on complicated subject.

[KatEyes]

Yes, the reports would likely say you have no known treatable condition. But sometimes things are evident, but don't meet the threshold to make a diagnosis, particular with obstructive sleep apnea. If you did not sleep enough or with enough of all the sleep stages and in all positions, including supine while in REM, one can reasonably assume that had one slept better any existing numbers would have been higher, maybe even meeting diagnostic criteria. I have sleep apnea and Periodic Limb Movement Disorder, so between the two, my sleep was miserable. I desperately needed sleep but at the same time dreaded it. Interesting about your OBE mention. That happened to me a couple times and after the first time I stayed up for 3 days afraid to go to sleep. It is my belief that I really was near death with my sleep apnea. It can rob the brain of oxygen and lead to all kinds of strange experiences. I know someone who woke up seeing giant spiders on the wall. Another would see people in her bedroom. I sleep with a CPAP machine. Took some adjusting, but once I got the comfortable with it and knew it was effectively keeping my airways open, I learned to trust it and go to sleep without fear. Haven't had any scary stuff happen in 5 years now.

[plasticjoe]

Interesting feedback. Thank you.
I do not have reports, and now live in another country. I think the reports will basically tell me that I have no known/treatable condition. I got very little sleep during the observation, yes.
I also think that I think that I have insomnia. Perhaps fear of sleep, or a feeling that there issomething I 'need to do'. The psychiatrists haven't been able to figure it out, and neither have the spiritualists. I have seen some strange things, and twice woke up while experienceing an OBE. I know it might sound crazy, but perhaps I feel that I will lose control when I sleep, not trusting the process.
Perhaps you could comment along these lines. What, if I may ask, was/is your condition? How did/do you deal with it?
I will try and get the reports, but it will be difficult.
Txs

[KatEyes]

Do you have copies of the detailed reports of your sleep studies? (more than the 1-2 page summary) I would suggest you compare them, looking for anything that makes you think twice. Sometimes clues are there, even when a study doesn't meet diagnostic criteria to put a label on it. Did you sleep poorly at those studies (doesn't everybody!)? There's a difference between a study showing that nothing is wrong and a study not identifying what is wrong. Some things to examine those reports for: How many arousals? What caused the arousals? Any mention of UARS? Any mention of limb movements? How much time supine while in REM?

Maybe this will yield some clues. I kinda have tunnel vision on these things because my experience is having had multiple sleep studies before reaching a diagnosis. I thought I had insomnia, but I think I was instinctually avoiding sleep because it was pretty miserable, and even dangerous. Best wishes on pinning down some answers.