What does smoking do for you? Is it just a habit or does it help you in any shape or form?
I guess in my mind I think that smoking just helps me feel less nervous and less anxious. I know that technically its a stimulant, but it does seem to help me calm my nerves, which is something I feel I could use a few times a week. Is that "helping" me in any real way, I dunno, probably not in a strictly medical sense. In fact, Im pretty sure its actively bad for me. Its also hard because my wife hates smoking, even though she herself is also a smoker, she has been so supportive and proud of me for "quitting" smoking. She claims that my quitting helps motivate her to try and quit herself, and on the occasion that I have talked about wanting to start back smoking again, she has adamantly opposed me starting smoking again, because she says it would make it almost impossible for her; so between her and my very anti-smoking workplace, I just have a few private cigarettes to myself every week.
I dont want to say that its my "5 minutes of peace" everyday, because I know thats just what every addict says, but the overly logical-argumentative side of my mind wants to argue that just a few cigarettes a week cant be that bad, even though I know its just maintaining an unhealth habbit that I need to muster the will to kick for good.
Because of the very reason you say you do it, is the very reason you should not smoke and get off of them now. That is exactly how I started smoking. I am also someone who swore they would never smoke. So as things in life caused more stress I smoked more and finally I was a chain smoker before I realized it. Over 35 years later her I sit, getting off of the smokes. 6 months on the end of june. And I still have times when stressed that I want one and at this point is mind over matter.