Stress Community
1.36k Members
Avatar universal

depressed student with sick family needs help

I am a Nursing student on my winter break and I feel more stressed now than I did during school. My dad has multiple myeloma and just had emergency surgery this last Thanksgiving for diverticulitis, a condition that we didn't know that he had. He now has a colostomy and a severe abdominal wound that is cared for every day by a home health nurse. Everyday he complains about his conditions and says that he "won't be around in 10 yrs." He likes to talk about death all the time and insists that we figure out a plan for when he is gone. This is extremely painful for me because he has always been the person that I can turn to for support and now I feel like I can't talk to anyone. My mother is severely depressed and has lots of memory issues right now. She falls asleep and stays asleep as soon as she gets home from work. I have a younger brother who is a senior in high school who I sometimes talk to, but he is usually in his room or out with his friends to avoid the house. I have social anxiety and so I don't have a lot of friends of my own and I don't really feel up to making any right now. I feel very sad and alone all the time. I also have a lot of body image issues and have started binge eating almost every night. I always try to go to sleep early, but I can never fall asleep because I'm so worried. I like to think of myself as a healthy person who likes to run and eat a healthy diet but I've been gaining weight and feel very out of control. My father says that he likes to talk to me because he feels like he can't talk to many people, with my mom being so depressed and my brother being gone a lot. I can't handle the pressure anymore. I need a way to cope with the stress and turn my life around but I really don't know what to do. On top of all of this, I'm also contemplating changing into a different major because I'm so unhappy with Nursing, which obviously makes my father very sad. I'm pretty sure that I want to switch but I don't want to put anymore pressure on him right now. Please help me reduce my stress.
2 Responses
1551327 tn?1514049467
I usually don't check in on here bit my other forums are stagnent.  You must be deserving some help because I have after years of work and consequences suffered from ptsd and bipolar I am healthy now and have time to help you clear up some if this unneeded worry.  I am bubulous, the community leader of the bipolar forum.  Personally I am a retured combat veteran and that is where I picked up the stress disorder. That's all I need to say about me because I sense seperatin in your post and I am ready to get to it.
Here are our options.  Because I am not busy amd I feel I should offer you can call me and block your number but since you have thd worry and anxiety I cant see you wanting to try that so for now catch me up in a quick respinse to let me know what your state of mind is as I re-read your post.  First thing to do is realize that I have to do as much as I can for you so dont worry about thinking too much.  I want you to know also i enjoy doing what I do and you are no burden to me I love my position and my employer.  Lets get started.
Here is what we need to talk about.  How long have you been back home and how long are you staying?
How much time do you have. Before you need to start working on changing your major and what were you thinking about changing it to?
Ia your dad joking around when he says that stuff and you kind of try to ignore it .  is there a physical pain that you experience in your back or possible in your stomach you feel hurt, stressed., or anger?  Is a different pain experienced for seperate emotions?
1551327 tn?1514049467
Since you likely got some rest I will offer encouragement by saying that I know what it is like to have to be in that situation.  I have more friends mow than I ever have had and it is about 3 true friends which to means honest and supportive.  I have 1 new friend that I used to kind of have a relationship with when I was 22 or so, and she found me in facebook so I I invited her up to say hi and see my new place.  Your dad sounds a little like a friend I used to have who was on some pretty strong medicine.  Is he taking pain killers for pain?  As a nursing student I suppose you might be assisting him with his medicine.
Have an Answer?
Top General Health Answerers
363281 tn?1518219421
Nelson, New Zealand
1756321 tn?1547098925
Queensland, Australia
80052 tn?1496327897
way off the beaten track!, BC
Learn About Top Answerers
Didn't find the answer you were looking for?
Ask a question
Popular Resources
In this unique and fascinating report from Missouri Medicine, world-renowned expert Dr. Raymond Moody examines what really happens when we almost die.
Think a loved one may be experiencing hearing loss? Here are five warning signs to watch for.
When it comes to your health, timing is everything
We’ve got a crash course on metabolism basics.
Learn what you can do to avoid ski injury and other common winter sports injury.
Here are the pros and cons of the top fad diets and weight loss plans of the year.