Oh, and one more thing: life gets better. I promise.
I'm a couple of years older than you and can't express how greatly I admire you for reaching out and trying to get help. That is the hardest part. I can't believe your student councillor told you that you were just bummed. One in three teenage girls is depressed. Hormones can be a b****, but four years of feeling "bummed" can't be attributed to those alone. My advice? Talk to people who you don't have to stay connected with, but are good listeners. If you find yourself in a dark place (internally), for goodness's sake call 1-800-273-TALK (8255) and do exactly as the last four letters say. Just talking can make you feel immensely better.
Hello Erin after reading your post I feel obligated to maybe help you. I see your 13 I am 29 I have been your age before and I know from experience that around that age a lot fell apart for me two from hormone changes things just didn't feel right any more see this is public sight so I don't want to share to much info for the world to know but when I was in the same state of mind many years ago I found writing in a journal to be help full I found a hobby that was my anger out let I started reading see you may not understand this know but a lot of things impact us by they way we think if we train our brain to think negatively we will respond emotionally negatively to the things around us for example I have learned that constructive criticism is not always bad if you look at things as a learning perspective and see how it can impact your life in the future or how its beneficial to you to learn the lesson in the matter at hand. see reading the part wear you said your telling your self you feel stupid I felt that way once and that's because every time I did something wrong I had parents that didn't realize that if you say things like your stupid or that's dumb ext.. to your kids they tend to think that way about them self so what i did was as I got older I started doing thing that proved them wrong and me smart like I at 14 was reading law books from the library and psychology 101 books I was getting straight A's also I started going to church something about being in church made me feel loved and apart of something. also realizing that in your teen years it feels like the end of the world but its not life is just getting started also encouraging my self daily like looking in the mirror and telling my self I am beautiful I am smart and today is a good day helped get me out of that mind set and remembering things like ** Strength is looking back and seeing what you have been through and knowing you were strong enough to make it through.** Decisions are the hardest move to make. Especially when its a choice between where you should be and where you want to be. here ar just some things that helped but like I said I don't want to share to much on here but if ever you want to talk I can be found At http://*************.***/***********.