thanks for the advice. would all that crying etc. harm a baby if i was pregnant?
These are normal feelings. But these are the times where one is susceptible for normal feelings of despair to turn into something truly unhealthy. So I would suggest that you find a good counsellor you can talk to about this. They may be able to give you some good coping strategies so that all of this can be over as soon as possible, and so that you can keep yourself safe. They can also monitor how you're feeling so that if it does ever get to the point that these feelings aren't normal anymore, then they can tell you and refer you to someone who can give you some treatment options.
Good luck.