i am not an expert on PAWS -- but what you describe is textbook anxiety.  is this something that you have dealt with in the past?  was it a reason for the -codone?  to relax you, make you feel more comfortable in certain situations?  if so...you may want to begin to research.  having suffered from both, i have found anxiety will build on itself...and if not caught early can be a bear to deal with.  if it does not subside i would consult your doctor and find some folks who deal with anxiety on or off any pharmacuticals.  continued success in your journey...you are truly an inspiration for many of us who check this board and gain strength from it.

I went through a 'bout of anxiety attacks right after my Father died.. a long story.. I'll spare you... but I was also taking Hydros at the time.   Stopped all meds.. felt fine for a long time.   Then three surgeries in three years... the last one was a hum dinger ... and have been Rx'd the Vics ever since.

C/T ... three weeks...

To answer your question...frankly, NO ... overwhelming anxiety has really not been a continual issue.   I know from the experience of Anxiety attacks from 5 years ago.. fear of them will cause them.    

Right now..it's not anxiety per se.  I'm feeling restless, I can't seem to sit still, I could be in a restuarant and want out them sorry I left...I did work this week and was functional I'm just feeling ill at ease.   Getting busy and getting my mind off of W/D is working... but man... getting into mainstream in taking it's toll.

I am taking xanax... .25 mg 2x's a day... .50 mg at night to help me sleep.   Trying to wean off that as well...but this is going to be a lot slower than W/Ding from the Vics... I can tell.

What do you know about PAWS

Thanks
Gip

If you Google "Post acute withdrawal" you'll get a host of sites that provide detail about PAWS.  I wish I knew at the moment where my notes were from Rehab-1, because they gave us a lot of info about how PAWS hit with different drugs of choice.

The problem I had with PAWS in early recovery was the absolute inability to focus.  On day 15 or 20 I'd feel like I had the world on a string and that nothing could go wrong.  But then around day 30 it seemed as if the bottom had fallen out - I'd be tired and foggy and just generally do-less.  I recall so many times thinking "OK, a few tabs to get me through this one project, then I'll just stop - I don't want to get out of control again."  The few tabs would get me through whatever it was, but I never just stopped.  Using reactivates the addiction.  I remember hearing that people in PAWS felt like they had hit a wall they couldn't get over and thinking "yes, that's exactly right."  Of course if you don't pick up you do break through the wall, and my experience is that you're always at a better level of recovery than before you hit the wall.  

At all times I've found the old H.A.L.T. deal to be an absolute must - I cannot allow my self to get too Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired.  If I'm any one of those things I'm in IMMEDIATE DANGER, and I must halt whatever I'm doing until I fix it.  The hunger aspect is especially important for me - when I get too hungry my brain doesn't tell me to eat, it screams "you need to use!!!"  I also apply a second meaning to the "L," which is "Lazy," i.e. whether I've had any recent exercise.  For me not getting regular exercise is almost as bad as getting too hungry.

I suppose it might be part of the "lonely" factor, but I find it helps to talk about these things.  This days I don't have ANY use-related thoughts, feelings or dreams that I don't share with someone as soon as I can.  It's amazing how their power fades away in the light - especially when compared to how their power can grew in the past when I just kept them to myself in a misguided effort to be tough or strong or whatever I thought I was being by refusing to appear anything less than 100% in control.  

With addiction, the one who surrenders the most wins.

CATUF

This is copied from http://www.addictionz.com/withdrawal.htm

Withdrawal

Recovering addicts in 12 step programs experience 3 similar yet different types of withdrawal.

Chemical withdrawal: physical and emotional symptoms - usually extreme during first 90 days of abstinence.
Watch for switching addictions during this period.
All types of withdrawal can have severe physical symptoms.
Emotional withdrawal: physical and emotional symptoms -
could occur at any time during abstinence.
Attendance at meetings and effective use of sponsors, counsellors and other 12 step members usually can assist during this normal part of recovery.

Post acute withdrawal: physical and emotional symptoms
occurs in random cycles anytime during recovery,
often misdiagnosed as other disorders (manic depression is one of the most common in my experience).
Sometimes associated with other hidden addictions, this phenomenon is the most common cause of relapse.
In our society the words fear and anxiety have become incorrectly synonymous.
Fear is one emotion and anxiety is quite another, in my experience anxiety is all my emotions rolled up into one unruly and misunderstood ball of feelings.
Personally, my reactions to this anxiety are what have caused me the most trouble. Almost always, I reach out to an addictive behavior.
This is why relapse is associated with anxiety/ post acute withdrawal. Past experience has shown that I may not react with a relapse into any particular addiction, but always into an addiction.
This is the phenomenon that happens when a 20 year veteran goes back to his/her addiction and leaves everyone scratching their heads in disbelief.


Don't fight withdrawal, it gains power by your denial.

Post Acute Withdrawal P.A.W.
Most often misunderstood, Post Acute Withdrawal occurs in random cycles throughout any normal 12 step addiction recovery. It is the engine that drives addiction. It is often commonly misdiagnosed as any number of mental and emotional disorders. It can take the fun out of your recovery flight!

Well into 12 step recovery many addicts are plagued with depressions, anxiety, and extreme behaviours. This is very puzzling and contradictory for the recovering addict. What actually occurs is an emotional buildup, it is perfectly normal part of life, however addicts react badly to this. They are not used to effectively handling pain, so they are tempted to medicate it somehow. Often it may be triggered by stuffed feelings and/or repressed creativity.


Withdrawal Recovery Tips:
Remember the Canada Goose, they fly effortlessly when properly grouped, each taking a turn at slugging the wind.
Don't Isolate or Medicate, it will pass soon enough.
Don't make major decisions while in this state.
Don't listen to yourself or take yourself too seriously.
Stay close to 12 step people experienced in dealing the post acute withdrawal cycle.

Thanks bunches...

You described how I am feeling quite accurately.  My last two days have been overly infused with "what ifs".   I don't really feel all that bad...but when those feelings come along I freeze with fear and rather than "dealing"... I isolate ....the periods between isolation vary...it's not like days...more like mins...1/2hrs.. etc... but I can see where it could become problamatic.

I'm still trying to wean off the damn Xanax... My Dr. says it won't happen in a week..I was destined to prove her wrong... I should leave well enough alone.

Maybe getting out of here for the weekend... a movie, dinner and time with some missed friends will help.

If this continues I will surely get myself to an AA meeting.

Between you and Adman I'm really becoming aware that this is part of it... I don't want to pick-up.. I HONESTLY do hate those pills... and I honestly did not understand why I am feeling the way I am

I cut and pasted all that you wrote...

I have indeed had a lot of "brain storms" lately that I have not put into motion... I should get off my little butt and plow through this.  One day at a time.   Someone else that I know personally suggested I go to an AA meeting and talk to someone who has gone through PAWS.. I know not everyone has to experience it... WHY ME.

Thanks bunches

Gip

that feeling certainly can be a part of the continuation of psychological withdrawal.  while the syptoms of anxiety are VERY, VERY real (too real and i could tell you stories also...but i'd rather never go back there)...the anxiety starts in our heads and we can build it up and up and UP by questioning symptoms, asking why we feel like this, etc.  sounds to me that you are doing all the right things.  the rx (no pun intended) for anxiety is healthy food, excercise and settling your body down as much as possible.  stay busy and try -- I KNOW it is very hard, not too avoid meetings, etc.  it can become a difficult habit to break once you head down that road.  do the best you can for today...give yourself a high five for all you have accomplished, do not be hard on yourself for what you cannot feel or do just yet (that in and of itself is anxiety producing) and know that this to shall pass...just not necessarily on a timeline we like.

Thanks... maybe that's just what I needed to hear.. I feel like I'm losing my FREAKING MIND.  When all these "clean" people are bouncing around feeling so good.

I'm in Marketing.. meetings are essential, and I do motivational speaking as well... LOL... if they could see me now.

I'm going to still get away this weekend... some friends, dinner and a movie might be good for the soul... I know that the fear of anxiety can cause it... I'm keeping that paramount in my head...I just don't like it...

Thanks for taking time

Gip

we share an industry.  let go and let whatever...don't feed the anxiety monster.  have a nice weekend and give yourself permission to be anxious a bit...it has been awhile since your mind hasn't been in an altered state and needs some time to figure things out.  i am confident it will and you will truly appreciate it.

I can hear myself in your words.

I am so very grateful you were here today.  

I wanna be that bouncy little cheerleader that is very enthused about putting down Vicodin and liFe is just bleepin rosey...*rolling eyes*... but like you said... I want it NOW...it just ain't happening for me NOW.

Just thanks...

Gip

No... I never used Vics to feel more comfortable... I was Rx'd the Vicodin...just got into taking them and usage climbed...I think the Vics actually started making me feel anxiety...then was RX'd Xanax as needed.

They worked in addition to the Vics for a little while... but I truly wanted out of the whirlwind of this doo*doo.

It's not like I can't talk to people..I'm still doing OK w/work... I just have no bleepin incentive I'm tired of acting perky the anxiety is at bay w/the help of the Xanax.. I'm actually going to see if my Dr. won't switch me to something that has a longer half life...and eventually just wean down to nothing.

I just want to feel normal...

I truly can't say thank you enough

Gip

i hate boucy cheerleaders!  they are over-rated.  have a great weekend and remember to remind yourself of all your progress.  little by little, that normal and happy and serene you are looking for will sneak in when you least expect it.

Oh goodie.... it will be like a bleepin surprise party ....sneaking up on me when I least expect it... LOLOL  I CAN NOT WAIT!

Note:  my feeble attempt to find humor...I sure do miss laughing...

Be well
Gip

>> I know not everyone has to experience it... WHY ME.

I think most if not all people who have become truly addicted experience PAWS.