I hope when my kid is a teenager its not payback time or me I put my poor mother throe hell she says I wasn't that bad but she's just glad its over I 'm sure and I grew out o it.  l iving is a real trip thats or sure.  Good luck with teenagers sounds like me when I was young.  God bless you and yours D

When it comes to our children that can always make us feel a little helpless in certain situations. I lost my daughter a little over 3 years ago (my daughter now is her twin sister) I am an only child but the same happened to my mother, she was supposed to be a twin and her twin died at birth. When I lost my daughter was when I was put on xanax and that was the period of time that I abused my meds. It is difficult not to want to abuse my meds this time of year. Your husband is right to a certain extent, there will always be difficult times when they are teens but the lack of respect and all of the lies is not just a normal "run of the mill" thing that can be brushed aside as a teenager thing. I never did any of those things as a teenager, I had to be home by 11pm in high school and aften did not stay out that late and many of my friends did the same, of course many of them were partying and staying out late too and some of them lying to their parents to do so. You mentioned that she is adopted and she knows her biological parents and they live nearby right? This type of behavior is really common to see in this type of situation and please have faith that you will not necessarily have to go through the same with your other children. The lying and lack of respect can be very difficult to deal with and know how to deal with appropriately, if you don't mind me asking how is she disciplined? And does she respond to it very well? Is she very open with you when you talk to her? or at least receptive and responsive about her behavior? Has she expressed how she feels or why she does this? Every child responds differently. My parents never believed in "my house, my rules" and I was never grounded simply because if I wasn't supposed to do something I just didn't do it. But that is neither here nor there, I was raised in a christian home also and it does make a difference even when it feels like it doesn't at times. I suppose sometimes venting is the best thing to do, just getting it off your chest and out there in the open. Just be strong, you've been strong and off the pills this far and you can continue doing so.Have you tightened up her courfieu at all? or tried other ways to get through to her recently? I know this can seem almost impossible with teenagers sometimes. Just know that you have faith and prayers from me and I'm sure from a lot of people here.

xoxo- D.

Hopefully this is a phase..teenage rebellion if you may. She's graduating and trying to discover where she fits in in life. Testing the waters and crossing lines is normal. Yeh it doesn't happen in all households but it does happen in many. Just keep reminding her of your love, your family values, and consequences that could occur if she makes various wrong choices. Tightening up the ropes at this point might just throw her in the opposite direction. Just preach your support for her and explain that even though she may have been able to pull of some stuff for some time, things have a way of unexpecidly catching up to you at the darnest of times. I have two daughters also and have been loathing the day when I am faced with these or similar issues......you think it is hard when they are born and they wake up through the night then there's the terrible twos to follow...but it's when they become their own person with their own thoughts of how the world is when we are really in trouble! My girls are 11 and 7 so I have a few years still to find a good therapist! We are currently at the stage ith my oldest where we are the stupidest people in the world, we don't know anything, and we are a bit of an embarressment to be around......life is funny. Just remeber you have planted the seed of goodness with your daughter, keep giving her the nurishment and caring she needs and she will pass through this phase.

Find something to take your mind off of her and off the pills. God bless

Hi Ladies.....The teenage years are very trying. We instill values in our children when they are young and pray, pray pray that they have heard even 1/8th of what we have said to them when they become teenagers. I pray a lot!!!!!!! I have a 15yr old boy...caught him drinking...grounded for 2 mos!  My 13yr old daughter is much more mentally challenging and, yes Jen....as far as my two oldest are concerned...I am the dumbest and most uncool person in the world...My daughter loves to correct me until she sees that she's pushing the envelope!  Then she backs off! But I love them both dearly and as far as teens go, they are good hearted kids. My 8 and 5 yr olds (girls) are a piece of cake...NOW!!! Give them a few more years and my hubby and I are in deep trouble!  Sorry to ramble but I can so relate to how you guys feel.....My children are the most precious thing on the earth to me....even when they cause me to want to rip my hair out!!!  I think by quitting the drugs I have found a greater patience with them....I was certainly no angel as a kid (lot's of partying/drugs that my mom never knew about). She was naive and my dad wasn't around (divorced when I was a baby) and he was a bit more savvy!  Anyway, if you are looking for motivation to stay clean or get off this rollercoaster, just look into the faces of your babies (mine will always be babies to me!) and think about what we are doing to them and the kind of role models we want to be.

Thanks guys for the encouraging words.  I just had a moment there when I thought it all just wasn't worth the battle.

Hubby saw the stress the situation was putting on me an told me he was "going to handle it".  

She is a good kid.  No drugs, alcohol, or anything like that.  She has lived strictly by house rules since the incident last summer.

Discipline consists of grounding, which she really hates, but doesn't "buck it" when it is given.  We can't take away her car, cause her mom and dad still pay for that.  (Lonnggg story). The grounding seems to work fine.  Plus a "lecture" from hubby/her 2nd dad.  He seems to be able to connect with her better than I can.  I blow my top!! Ha.  It's the "control" issue that I am dealing with daily.  Lots of others too, but this is a biggie.

I just wanna get through graduation weekend and maybe next week the thrill of it all will be over.  If not, we will tackle it one minute at a time, seeking the guidance of God all the way through.

Thanks you guys.  And Dutchess.  I truly am sorry about you losing your daughter.  I was pregnant 10 yrs ago and started having problems.  They told me I was pregnant with twins, and that I had lost them, but at the LAST minute before doing a D&C, they decided to do 1 more ultra sound and they found out that I was still carrying a child.  I did lose the other.  Losing a child is painful.  I walked hand in hand with my best friend who lost her 8 yr old son to a gunshot accident 11 yrs ago.  Still painful to this day.  Next week will be 3 yrs since I lost my mom, and in that same week, on the day I was getting into my van to go to the church for the service, the phone rang and it was my aunt, (my mom's sister) screaming, "our baby is here but she is dead!!!"  I can still hear that scream in my ear to this day.  Why did that all have to happen within 2 days of each other!!!!  I praise God that I have Him to turn to in times of trouble.

Thanks guys for encouraging.  I made it through...just for today.

Until Then
LL