I want to know too!!!  I prayed for you last night and you will make the right choice.

((((Hopeless))))

Tim

Yes, dear...where are you..We need some sort of update..If you are there, let us know...I think is you log on and talk to us, you won't get those pills...

I hope you are ok....we love you!!!

Lisa

Hi guys,

I got those pills last night (Melantonin) took one around 9:30 last night, and they made my legs and body relax i did not feel jumpy at all... But I did not sleep at all...At 4:00 this morning i took 2 of my tylenol simply sleeps, and still did not get any sleep...
I am a freakin zombie, NO sleep, Have not had a nights sleep since June 2...
Today is June 15...I can't take this anymore...
I honestly don't know what i am going to do today...
I am sooooooooooooooooooooooo ready to say he** with it all.
I have not been to work since June 1...I am going to lose my job, which i have been at for almost 5 years, I work at a Business College...That i graduated from, and this does not look good on me.
I can't function, I am so damm weak, from NO sleep.
I have lost over 25 lbs. since i started this whole thing.
I think i need to just quit, give up...I can't do this to my body anymore. I am drained, and worn out, physically and mentally...

OMG guys, i am a failure once again, Please don't preach and be disappointed in me...I know this is a hard thing to deal with, I just can't sleep at all anymore. My kids need me...I need to do what i feel is right, at least for now...

I am not saying i am going to take any, i am just saying i am not sure as of right now. I have tried all i know to do, Now i am lost and confused...

If I fail, I promise all of you one thing, You will be the first to know...I need you guys, your support has meant so much to me... I beg you PLEASE dont look down on me, and PLEASE just understand me...

I am so damm sorry guys, We have come so far, I feel like i am letting so many of you down, You have all been here for me and for that i am so grateful...God I feel that i have done nothing but waste your time and all of your positive energy that you all have given me... But I just need to sleep again, I gotta get back to work, I gotta be ok for my kids and everyone else around me.
When i get NO sleep i can't do none of this, Think about it guys From June 2, until now June 15 with NOOO SLEEP, and I mean NONE....

I will keep ya posted throughout the day, and I will be totally honest in the decision I end up making, maybe i will have the strength, maybe i won't..

You all mean the world to me,
I mean this from the bottom of my heart...

PS...... Tim, I am so sorry, i preached to you so many times and convinced you out of it (alot)...I feel just awful...Please just understand, and Please don't be disappointed if i fail today... I will let ya know my final decision later today...


Thank all of you,

Hugzzzz...........Hopeless

I would never preach to you hon. I feel like giving up too and it is very hard not to get some pills. You made the first step and the will lead to many more steps. This is not easy to do and maybe you can look into other alternatives. You have helped me so much and please stay on the forum. There are people that quit every week. If you didn't even try to attempt it then that would be a different story. Maybe you could try a taper? I am always here for you and whatever decision you make is fine with me. You are such an asset to this forum and your kind loving words have helped many. I don't even know if I can make the weekend. I will be honest with you too. I am praying for you and care very much about you. Be happy and feel peace.

Love,
Tim

You are always welcome here.  I would never think of looking down on you.  I have only said things in the past to try to help you stay sober.  I have failed many times!  I have abused for a decade and have been through withdrawals so many times I can't count.  It was never for the right reason though.  It was because the supply was low or whatever but not for the reason of wanting my life back like I do now.  Sweetie we all slip - I know this is the hardest thing you have ever gone through.  Like Tim said maybe you can taper.  Whatever you do - you stay here with us!

We all care and love you!

Shelby

sweet pea... you do what you need to do.  there is NO judgement here.  the girl typing this slipped the other day, remember?  please do not come down on yourself.

the positive side is, now you know what you will need next time, if indeed you do slip.  you know you will need a planned out drug therapy (thing..) to ensure sleep is had.

don't judge yourself, do what you need to do to get through today, and if you fall (and you may not, you know..) but if you do we're all here with big ol' arms to catch ya!

luv ya girl,
mj

Aww, honey....We would NEVER preach to you...

We have all been there at one point or another. I am no one to throw stones....lol...I just want you to be ok. I want the best for you and I know you do to. This is a major corssroads in your life and the choices are hard, believe me I know. I do want the best for you, but no matter what you do, I am here for you. I am here if you need to talk or just want to vent. I do not want to see you get the pills and leave this forum. We cannot stop you from doing anything, all we can do is give you the support you need. I am praying for you today. I hope that everything turns out ok...I am here if you need me...

Take Care and we are all pulling for you....

Lisa

Babygirl. I've been at work all morning, and I see you are still strugglig. Sounds
like everyone gonna still love you reguardless, myself included. Don't do it.
Its gonna be a f---ed up high, cause you;ve come so far. It will be a guilt ridden high, and it won't be the same like the other highs. If you do it tell me i'm wrong. Just know you haven't wasted anyones time and  babygirl, I still love you. I guess its gonna be me and you out back in the parking lot.  May i say this sounds premeditaded? At the very least from the time you got the call yesterday.                   cathy

Hello,
         I have been addicted to pills for the last 3 years of my life and they by far have been the worst.  I lost my job/car and house due to them and my wife.  Though i should mention she was addicted to.   The hardest thing for me is when i quit for 5-6 days i always relapse and it hurts worse and worse each time.  Im goin got enter a rehab clinic this weekend and i hope that its the cure of all cures if there is such a thing.  Taking the vicodin for pain was the worse mistake of my life and i feel like im going to pay for it for the rest of my days.  Currently i have a great job and im a single father with a little boy who looks up to me and it break my heart to take the pills and for him to one day find out.  That's one of the biggest reasons for me trying to rehab besides all the other bad stuff associated with taking pills.  I enjoy all the good storys ppl have shared on this board and it has encouraged me to seek help to the higher power.  Hopefuly the Oupatient rehab can help me, although i feel like im going to crave the addiction for the rest of my life.  I talk to a therapist and she told me that i should quit my job and go into rehab for a month.  This doesnt sound like the best idea to me because its very hard to find a job a good as mine in michigan that provides great pay and insurance for me and my son.

Anyone with advice i would appreciate.
Thankx

you should be able to get emergency leave from work.  in california we can, by law they have to give it to you.  you really need to get a dr.s help, but don't turn it in to your insurance.  they are always looking for a reason to drop someone.  you can do it.  i was afraid of it all too, but i did it for myself first then my family.  it is worth it.  just remember, no matter how hard it is to find a new job, your life is worth more.  I'll be praying for you,

Lucy