My husband wants out of Bradford!

Question

He just called me at work and asked me to come and get him. I want to but, I really don't feel he is ready but, he tells me that he is. I am really worried and i don't know what to do. I told him that if he comes home and F---s up that he is out of the house. I will no longer put our girls theough this. I don't deserve is and neither do they. I just feel that he is giving up. If he can't stick with rehab how in the world will he make it???????? OH< GOD SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME

shelby74 · Answer

Do not do it, no matter what!  You want to go through that again??  He needs to get serious about recovery and obviously he has not reached that point.  Protect yourself and your family - tough love is required here.  Do not love him to death (as they say on intervention).  Tell him if he comes home it is over.  Please, please do this for him and yourself!

Shelby

Tim2H · Answer

Put your foot down now. I agree with Shelby. He has not given it a chance and will be right back on drugs. He is going through horrible withdrawal now and will do anything to get some. If you pick him up, you can plan on it being the same ole thing. Tell him if he makes it through the weekend then you will pick him up. He might adjust in that time. Friday nights and weekends, I enjoyed my pills the most.

TaFaye · Answer

I just spoke with his cons. and I am going out there when I get off work this makes 2 days back to back that I have been out there. I told him that If he gets someone else to come and get him he can't come home. When I told him that him coming home before his time wasn't a good thing he accused me of not loving him. By golly, he is fixing to get a boot in the butt I have already gotten very mad about this. He is also mad at me because I won't get a loan for $1400.00 what ins. won't cover but, you know what I will not get stuck with that bill when he back slides and at this point he probally will. I could just cry he was doing so good and now he is trying to make me believe that he holds the world in his hands. He is just guilting the Hell out of me and that is not love.

shelby74 · Answer

Please do not take it too personally.  He is just doing what all of us addicts do.  He will not realize until he goes through this process what he has been doing to you and your family.  Just give it time sweetie and under no circumstances let him come home!

Hug,

Shelby

tztlady · Answer

I am a 46 yr old mom of 3.  If there is one thing I would tell myself, if I could go back in time is this:   TRUST YOUR INTUITION MORE OFTEN!   Tafaye, you are answering your own question, sweetie.   You said two important things in your post.  1.  "I don't think he is ready"  Trust me, he isn't.  2.  "The girls and I don't deserve to go through this again"  You are right, you don't but YOU have a choice, the babies do not deserve it OR have a choice.  

It's just you in the drivers seat.  Hon, it's time to let the mama tigress come on out and do what you know is best for those babies and yourself.

Don't pick him up!  He is asking you to cosign his BS.  Even if he doesn't know it is BS, it is.............I mean this in the most loving way, you seem like a nice person and I have seen so many people buy in to what your hubby is asking you to do right now.    In the end, noone wins.  You can't make him recover from drug addiction but you sure can not help him stay in active addiction by allowing him back in to your home.

Blessings and please keep us posted.
tzt

fishmeal · Answer

It is very possibel that he's not medicated right and need an addiction doc.... Make an appointment with and addiction doc before you get him home and take him to see that one... That's what has been put on my heart right now.  (supernatural stuff)

My husband wants out of Bradford!

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