talk to me plz

[mich557]

i am only on my 7th hour of no pills, this is my second round of detoxing i was clean for over a year and felt amazing to be clean best year of my life really.But the thought of pills never went away i dreamt about them thought about them talked about them but thought i was ok because i didnt do them....obviously not the case i just didnt know where to get them as i moved away from my home but the moment i found someone with them i was right back to where i was a year ago. and now i am again completely broke and ashamed and alone, i guess i need after care obviously its just messing with my head as to why WHY i feel i need those stupid ******* pills i live a pretty good life i think have a management position at a job i love, i two beautiful kids who are the world to me so why have i pit my self in debt again and made myself so unhappy ugggggh i know im blabbing here im just so confused and messed up i want my life back for me and my kids its crazy that i just did this not long ago and loved the feeling of being clean im right back im so stupid

[LeaAnn807]

Hi!!  You have a great attitude going in!  That will help you more than you know. Just keep telling yourself that you have the flu.  Like the flu, it WILL end at some point.  3-5 days is the worst of it as far as length, but I'm sure you already know that!  Mine always let up, from opiate withdrawal, after about 72 hours.  My last thing, tramadol, was quite different!!!  NEVER take that!  : )


You can do this!  Keep us posted on how you're doing!

[MikeInFrance]

Hey Mich... it's a really difficult situation... You know what is best...what you need for yourself and what you want.  It's the mental side of this that pulled u back in so I would say that once you get past the first days of detox then you really need to pay more attention to that part of it. Pills haven't been accessible to me and I have made sure it stays that way but we can only control so much. I try to prepare for that situation now, if and when it arrives. Cuz even though we may not always feel it.....but when we are clean...we are at our strongest and our best!

Keep posting to let us know how you're doing ... You know you can do this!

[mich557]

thanks guys for the support it helps me to come on here and read everyones post and see how kind every one is! yes i am hunkering down starting to feel pretty crappy.. oh well like you say its like a bad flu
ill get through this

[IwillDoThis]

Mich - I'm sorry you are in such a dark place hon - it is no fun.  You've been down this road before so you know what to expect.  Sometimes stopping pills is a process that takes time - perhaps last time you just hadn't worked through some of the reasons or pain that made you abuse them in the first place.   You stopped, felt great but maybe those underlying unresolved issues were still gnawing at you.

You've picked yourself up and made the decision to try again and should be proud of that.  Courage is the will to keep trying so don't beat yourself up.  You are here now and that is what matters.

You know you'll be moving into a few pretty intense days in a few hours so hunker down, get some gatorade, immodium.  I took lots of hot showers - like every hour on the hour to get relief.  I just kept telling myself I had the worst flu ever and that I just had to get through it.

Welcome and I'm glad you found this place as you'll be supported and understood.  Keep posting for support and know there are lots of us pulling for you here.  Hang in there!

[Teri9498]

   Hi sweetie, sorry u feel like this, those damn pills!!  I know it s**ks!!!!  Maybe u need to get into some after care?  See what your triggers are?  U said it's been 7hrs of no pills, that's awesome!  Take it one minute at a time if u have to.  Try not to worry about tomorrow.  Today is my first day of no methadone after tapering for about 6mo.  I'm scared of what's to come!  I've already been in pretty bad withdrawals with the tapering, so I can only imagine!  If u want to talk message me, I'm here!...........take care, Teri  :)