Aa
After over 30 days clean I relapsed
I've been clean for over a month until about a week ago. I took over 120 pills in a weeks time. Im sick as a dog now and dont know what to do. The WD are not as bad but I still feel them. I'm scared and don't like feeling like this. My girlfriend found out I was using and left me. I lost my dog this morning to being ran over my worlds falling apart. I took three vicodin today because of how sick I was but I am feeling a bit better. I don't want to use I have a problem and I just need to kick this again before it gets out of hand. I call the dr today and asked them to quit sending me the damn pills. What do I do.
Hi there, how are you doing? Stay close to the computer for the next week and post so we can help you over any rough spots. Good for you trying again!
Hey Cakifornia, I go to NA meetings and have found them quite helpful. It feels good to get hugs and look other addicts in the eyes. Aftercare comes in many different ways. You can go to meetings, take what you want and leave the rest.
The bottom line is this. We will always be addicts. But we are in recovery and everyday without the drugs is a good day.
I'm proud of you!!!!
The bottom line is this. We will always be addicts. But we are in recovery and everyday without the drugs is a good day.
I'm proud of you!!!!
yeah I used the thomas recipe and amino acid protocol before works wonders.... I still have all the stuff from a month ago. I am taking them now. NA meetings, I think I need to go to a meeting.
I am truly sorry for the loss of your dear dog....
you are not dumb but you are an addict.. and yes, you have taken the first step on the right direction, step by step you will do it, california.. have you tried NA meetings ? and you know about the thomas recipe and the amino acid protocol for helping with wds now, right ? we will be here so don't feel alone now :)
you are not dumb but you are an addict.. and yes, you have taken the first step on the right direction, step by step you will do it, california.. have you tried NA meetings ? and you know about the thomas recipe and the amino acid protocol for helping with wds now, right ? we will be here so don't feel alone now :)
Today is the first day again with out taking any pills. I am feeling ok, a bit tired, but its a step in the right direction. Thank you for all the support as I do not have any support at home. I'm on my own this time. I don't want to take the pills anymore as like the first time. The WD the first time were so bad. I was sick for 20 days before starting to feel better. I can't believe I relapsed, I'm dumb. I'm going to keep my head up and take it one day at a time. I don't have any after care and I'm not sure where to go for support.
hi cal. so sorry about your dog. oh and gf too. can i ask you what made you relapse? the w/d are so bad i dont want to do it again. although if i lost my dog i dont know what i would do. this community is behind you and will share our strength please keep posting, bellabo
Hi I am sorry to hear about your dog, but more sorry about your relapse. I have been wondering about you and how you are doing. I followed your story as I was detoxing. You gave me strength to get going and I have 28 days now. Please pick yourself back up and keep going. Its a relapse not failure. You have inspired other people like myself to quit now inspire yourself and make this day 1 again. Please post and let us help you.
COMMUNITY LEADER
I am really sorry about your dog. I know how important our pets are. In time you will find comfort in your memories~~
Until you are really ready to stop this insanity this will keep happening. Insanity is defined as doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. You gotta get real with yourself and this situation. What are your plans this time around? You got it in you to clean up so start fighting for you, your life depends on it~~sara
Until you are really ready to stop this insanity this will keep happening. Insanity is defined as doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. You gotta get real with yourself and this situation. What are your plans this time around? You got it in you to clean up so start fighting for you, your life depends on it~~sara
Lucky, that was such a sweet post. Every word true, too. My current two dogs are both young, so they are healthy, funny, and a total pleasure. The love of pets is the only perfect love relationship we have a chance at in this life.
Dogs have always been part of my life as well, and It never gets easier when you loose your most loyal friend. Take your time, then when you are ready, there are thousands of great dogs in shelters that are desperate to be your next loyal best friend, which will also help you remember your last one in surprising ways.
Right Now I have a 3 year old Mastif I have had since he was 6 weeks old, and fit in the palm of my hand, and now weights 190 lbs and can drag me around like I wasn't there. And when he ate my couch it reminded me so much of how my last male Rottie ate my old couch. When he ate every pair of boots and shoes in the house it reminded me how many times we had to go barefoot to by new shoes when our St Bernard/collie/red setter cross monster mutt ate all our shoes.
The point is there's a good dog waiting to help put some joy in your life, and when you meet that one special dog he'll pick you and let you know he's the one.
Right Now I have a 3 year old Mastif I have had since he was 6 weeks old, and fit in the palm of my hand, and now weights 190 lbs and can drag me around like I wasn't there. And when he ate my couch it reminded me so much of how my last male Rottie ate my old couch. When he ate every pair of boots and shoes in the house it reminded me how many times we had to go barefoot to by new shoes when our St Bernard/collie/red setter cross monster mutt ate all our shoes.
The point is there's a good dog waiting to help put some joy in your life, and when you meet that one special dog he'll pick you and let you know he's the one.
Hi there---
I'm sorry things are falling apart. I'm particularly sorry about your dog because that wasn't your doing. Please accept my sympathy, as my pets are everything to me. I hope when you feel better you can get another pup. Pups like to walk and play, and nurturing a new friend can be very healing to you. And getting out and walking the dog every day is very good for you!
I do remember you and I remember writing to you. Then we doidn't hear, and I was worried. It appears that my worries were justified. Can you pinpoint exactly what made you relapse? That's the only way you'll learn from this is to be introspective and very, very honest with yourself. The others have given you much to think about, too, and much to change. Please write back again soon. Don't run, don't hide. Just post. I wish you a successful experience this next time!
I'm sorry things are falling apart. I'm particularly sorry about your dog because that wasn't your doing. Please accept my sympathy, as my pets are everything to me. I hope when you feel better you can get another pup. Pups like to walk and play, and nurturing a new friend can be very healing to you. And getting out and walking the dog every day is very good for you!
I do remember you and I remember writing to you. Then we doidn't hear, and I was worried. It appears that my worries were justified. Can you pinpoint exactly what made you relapse? That's the only way you'll learn from this is to be introspective and very, very honest with yourself. The others have given you much to think about, too, and much to change. Please write back again soon. Don't run, don't hide. Just post. I wish you a successful experience this next time!
Benzo's aren't any better. A drug is a drug is a drug. Why take drugs when there is a better, natural way?
What do you mean you don't know what to do? Quit taking them is what you KNOW you have to do.
Or, jst pop some more till you get right back to a full dependency.
Of course you feel better after popping another three. Feed that monster, that's what it wants you to do.
You are very quickly running out of time. The BEST thing you can do is flush the pills you have RIGHT NOW.
Why did you have another prescript in the first place? That's the same as an alcoholic having a case of beer and a bottle of liquor in the fridge. It isn't going to stay in there for long. It's just a reminder that you want another drink.
You aren't going to get clean and stay clean ubtil you WANT to, and doing so requires that you get rid of any pills, tear up any scripts, and remove any contact where there are pills to tempt you. YES, that means finding new friends if the ones you know are going to be waving drugs in your face all the time. Those aren't "friends" anyway.
Or, jst pop some more till you get right back to a full dependency.
Of course you feel better after popping another three. Feed that monster, that's what it wants you to do.
You are very quickly running out of time. The BEST thing you can do is flush the pills you have RIGHT NOW.
Why did you have another prescript in the first place? That's the same as an alcoholic having a case of beer and a bottle of liquor in the fridge. It isn't going to stay in there for long. It's just a reminder that you want another drink.
You aren't going to get clean and stay clean ubtil you WANT to, and doing so requires that you get rid of any pills, tear up any scripts, and remove any contact where there are pills to tempt you. YES, that means finding new friends if the ones you know are going to be waving drugs in your face all the time. Those aren't "friends" anyway.
u not gonna stop taking them while u still have them.get ur detox supplies,flush the pills.get aftercare.tell ur Dr to call u n some stuff to help w/opiate w/d like clonidine,a small amount of a benzo w/a long half life(like valium,klonipin etc.).Ur allowed to make a mistake as long as ur willing to face it,fix urself by quiting,not getting anymore scripts etc.YOU CAN DO THIS.Good luck.Im very sorry about ur dog.DONT use that loss or ur GF leaving as an excuse2use.Prove that u can do it even if that means alone.
Hey California, I'm sorry to hear that but what's done is done. All you have is this moment and a choice. Did you get aftercare during your 30 days?
I'm glad you posted. It's the first step. Your reaching out and you already know the dark path you will go down if you keep using. Yes, call your dr and be honest. Tell them no more.
Sorry to hear about your gf and doggie. I hope they both come back. Aftercare my friend.
I'm glad you posted. It's the first step. Your reaching out and you already know the dark path you will go down if you keep using. Yes, call your dr and be honest. Tell them no more.
Sorry to hear about your gf and doggie. I hope they both come back. Aftercare my friend.
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