my story

[gottadothis]

hello, I'm gonna tell my story on my lucky number day :) well it all started for me 4 years ago my dad was told he had cancer and wasn't going to live a year, they of course gave him pain pills for the pain and he didn't want them he always said he didn't like feeling loopy! well you know who took one for a good ol stress headache i had that day and wow i felt great all of the sudden i didn't have a care in the world. well three months and two days later my dad was gone. so instead of dealing with the pain i took the pain meds! one year after my dad passed away my brother was caught up in a bad situation and now hes lost his life. meanwhile six months ago i made a choice to sell my house of 9 years and move to a small town....had to be the pills because now that I'm no longer using I'm like what  was i thinking!!  and the only thing i can come up with was well i wasn't! so now here i am left with a big mess!  all the pain iv tried to cover up has hit me all at once!  on a good note and there is one thank god!  I'm starting to feel better and i can think a little better, plus i hear my kids when they talk. and i might even live to see how they do in life.:)  its hard at times because no one knows about my problem I'm really bad with communication.  you guys who left post for me on here while i sat and cried thank you so so much it really did help, i read a post that said  "STOP FEEDING THE HUNGER AND THE CRAVING WILL GO AWAY" i kept that in mind and it really helped a lot and its true!   i know i have a long road ahead of me but I'm gonna keep up the fight and i hope you all do also!   today the sun is shining!  

[laurel453]

Don't hide your emotions and your feelings now..  don't numb them nor hide from them... keeping them inside us sooner or later, get loose inside us and yeah, i was bad with communication too , no surprise cause i used to numb everything with pills but it is good that we can learn a lot of those things we are not good at, maybe we will never become masters  but we can do them much better , go for it and keep your spirit and hopes high, work on yourself , go for aftercare while walking  this road and Congrats on your clean time !! :)

[mentalmary]

CONGRAT!!!!...im a few steps behind ya ...but im a'cummin......GO!FIGHT!WIN!....lol