Oooo bad cravings again

[kellygirll]

It's this working in Saturdays my old routine/habit had a pill dream last night  man does this suck I so don't want to screw up I wish I had this lady's number from one of my meetings to call her it's at home I think maybe it's time I get a sponsor? Anyways I'm trying with all I got I keep saying just don't use just don't use I'm going to see if I can find a meeting her or around here pray fo me guys

[clean_in_ks]

Some questions:

Did you go to a meeting last night?
Did you talk to anybody about the beach trip/pill thoughts either before or after a meeting since you posted about it as suggested?
Are you continuing to text, have FB contact, etc with your friend that has been your pill source?  I mean AT ALL this past week or so?
Since you only work the weekends...and Saturdays was always your day to go get pills from her on your lunch hour....you need to have an "ahead of time" plan for Saturdays so old habitual thinking doesn't kick in.
Being around your hubby during the week helps with some accountability....but on the weekends, which if I remember right, you work Sat and Sun only....which gets you away from your hubby and makes it possible to "go get pills without anyone knowing" cause you always used to right?  Our addict brains have to be UN-programmed....and it takes a lot of un-learning and re-learning.  
It's imperative to talk to another woman in recovery about these ongoing cravings, Kelly.  Even if you still aren't talking in meetings.....hitting a meeting every day and talking BEFORE or AFTER the meeting about what's going on in your head is critical to your success.

[falsehope]

Smart idea coming here. I have read through some posts and people here are so helpful and supportive!  I have just started my taper, again, and I ENVY where you are! Stay strong and do whatever it takes to fight the cravings, do it for those of us who are just starting our journey and will pull hope from you knowing this is possible! You have done the impossible  and I will be on your shoes very soon, by then this will ALL seem like a bad dream...

[msdelight]

Hey Kelly glad you posted! We all have had those disturbing dreams. It just a part of the initial detox. Funny how the addict brain trys to grab us in our sleep like a demon in the night. It was only a dream. Stop thinking about it and focus all your mental energy on your job. It will pass. Don't give it power by dwelling on it. Get to a meeting ASAP.  Sponsor, yes. Phone numbers in pocket at all times! Feel better girl! Push through!

[azulito]

Stay strong, I am on day 7 and working in the hot sun. Sure using would make it easier. remember that anything worth having is worth fighting for.
I know that feeling when a little whisper starts in your head and it builds to a scream saying: "CALL THE GUY"...... DONT!!!!! - scream back when it whispers before it builds- you can beat it
lots of love and stay strong.
chat anytime
Azulito

[saspan]

hang in there K, I,m on day 15and some are harder than others. speaking of dreams I had one the other night ,just one In 15 days but it was so real and vivid I could taste it.man it took a moment to get over that. if you could find an aa or na meeting that would boost your confidence and keep your mind on something other than using. if you have a Saturday routine that needs to be changed a Saturday morning meeting would do you good. hang in there ONE DAY AT A TIME!!! PEACE OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!