overtaking my prescription hydrocodone 10/325

[yoyojo]

Need support taking my meds the way I am supposed to. I've been taking norco for over 9 years.Currently I am supposed to take 4x 10/325 a day. I have neuropathy in my feet and bouts of sciatica, have had severe depression bouts. I quit taking anti depressants and have lorazapam and don't abuse it. Around xmas I had a bout with shingles in my good leg and left foot top of butt all the way down. Took way more norco than I was supposed to. Doc gave me an early refill, Thank God... but now I just keep taking to many.. its like if I don't take 2 in the am, instead of 1 like I'm supposed to the pain is just not in control. I wake up every morning burning up, feet on fire and feel like my whole body is having tremor like feelings. I've told my dr about this and she says its my anxietly and to take my xanex. more, I only take at bedtime mostly it makes me tired and have to care for elderly mom. I am out of control now and puchased oxy pills off the street a couple weeks ago.. my god 25 bucks each. I have never gotten to this point before, usually borrow tramedol and it helps when I run out to soon . I live in a small town 132 miles from the nearest walmart. My brain just craves more pills now.. I used to be able to control myself, I am terrified to lose my prescription. There are only 3 doctors an 2 nurse practitioners where I live. The one I see wants me to go to pain management all over again. How do I control myself.. I find myself taking 2 without even thinking about it... I never dreamed I would ever be a drug abuser.. or addict.. need my meds.. but not working like they used to.. Anybody out there, I'm 49 and would love to have my life back, but terrified to quit. I'm mental... Help.. even ordered withdrawal ease pills yesterday... Care for my 90 year old bed ridden mom and my patience have been awful... I need help and good support online... no where else to go here thats private. referrals for good online support groups or therapy. On disability so don't have a bunch of bucks... just medicare... what a joke. but lucky compared to some. Thanks

[vicki595]

Hey Yoyo!  Welcome.  This is always tough. You need pain management but you abuse you meds...it's a sticky wicket!  Always!
I agree with pain management and you should take your prescribed xanax. It will help you. It's your brain telling you to take two instead of one. You're treating your anxiety and depression with opiates and it will bite you every time!
Do not go to the streets for pills. It's so dangerous and costly. Try to taper down a little,not too much,and after a month or so,taper a little more.  It also helps if you take your pills on an exact schedule, around the clock.

I'm sure you know all this...but that's all I can offer right now. You need to do the work here and although it's hard, it can be done!

Keep posting!