Couple of hours away from the 72 hr mark.

I'm almost stepping into day 4 country.  I am really proud of myself because I did this alone for the first time, there was nobody with me except this forum.  I wanted to thank all of you for your words of encouragement and advice.  I really hope the ones that were struggling with me are staying strong and doing well and to the others with serious clean time I wish you all the best and thank you all sincerely.  As for how I'm feeling, its been pretty sluggish, sore, no energy but I did finally crave food for the first time today.  One question though, about the diareaha, it only hit me once so far when it has been a big problem for me before, any thoughts?  Anyways thanks to all and good luck to you.  Keep posting because I still will be.
K.J.

[gullysquid]

O was gonna suggest to stay home but looks like you made your mind up. I've had similar situations and I think I went to one event,it just depends on how you feel. But I've read your posts since day one,GREAT WORK!!! Your getting closer and closer. Is it possible you go to the game but sit where you cant really be noticed and leave as soon as it ends. Get in,get out. Just an option but being clean is priority one. Keep it up,your motivating me!

[dominosarah]

Congrats on 4 days!!  Glad to see you have hunger pains!!  Have you thought anything about recovery care?

[rockbottom1970]

I feel aftercare is a must for me, I've thought about it and will be doing something about it once the worst of the physical WD's are behind me.  I think I mentioned an underlying issue with my wife to you so It is imperative for me to heal properly.  More of my story will be coming out on better days. Thanks Sara.

[Baker3336]

I only had diarrhea twice. I had every other wd symptom except stomach problems. If there not there than just don't worry about it. I did take immodium once but that was all I needed. Just stay hydrated even days after you start feeling better. Just keep flushing the system.

[rockbottom1970]

Thaks for the advice, I'm really happy the stomach issues are not as vigilant because the rest of it has been pretty bad, one less thing to worry about. Thnks again!

[Silleestarfish]

Yeah for us! I reach 72 hours this evening, as well. Its been a tough few days, but I'm feeling better and more importantly my head feels clearer, with each passing day. The natural remedies have helped a lot and keeping logged onto the boards for the critical support we each need to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Rockbottom- you rock:) One day at a time!

Steph

[sudie58]

its really good that your getting your appetite back, you are well on your way now! and how great that your thinking about aftercare, it took me several goes, and i really wish i had done something about that a lot earlier than i did,!! 4 days done! stay strong .  sudie  

[rockbottom1970]

First of all thanks for the kind words.  I have a little dilemma that just popped up, my ex has just invited me to my 7 yr old sons semi-final hockey game tomorrow. It's the 3rd game of three with the series tied up, winner goes to finals.  Nonetheless it is an important game but she doesn't understand that I have no energy at all!  Very quickly my mind went to using pills only for tomorrow morning and continuing with what I'm doing (detoxing) when i get back.  I know this will be a disaster for me because I've always relapsed between day 5 - 7.  Is there any kind of supplement that can give me an energy boost for a few hours while not putting my sobriety in jeopardy. I hate to this to both my ex and especially my son but I may have to pass on the game.  This will probably anger her as I am trying to get back the family I lost and  miss so much.  Any thoughts would be welcome.  Thanks in advance.

[sudie58]

your sobriety must come first, so if you feel it maybe jepardise it in anyway, perhaps you shouldnt go, on the other hand, it may do you good, take your mind off withdrawals, get fresh air, etc, not really much help am i? but whatever you decide, stay strong, your doing so well!!!!!, take care ,   sudie

[IBKleen]

I don't know what you could take. In all honesty, I think it would be dangerous to take anything. We relapse mentally before we pick up the drug and if you are lucky enough to catch or if someone catches it for you, you could snap out of it. Just a few hours ago you were bragging that you were coming up on day 4 and happy to be here. As soon as you were asked to do something that you have done in the past, you were looking for that "push" to get you through it. You put the pills down hun and you have to work on your thinking and your behavior now. No more taking a pill to feel better, or to go somewhere, or to get you through something. That has to come from in side you if you want to stay clean.

I hope you thought about this and have changed your mind about taking anything to get through a hockey game. You CAN make it!!!

[rockbottom1970]

I know what using will do to my sobriety thats why I dont want to use, maybe a 5 hour energy drink or something may help, I dont know.  You are right IBKleen, I was, and still am, happy that I'm into day four.  I cant risk what I worked so hard for, but honestly my minds playing games with me and I'm having a hard time shutting the brain out. Its pretty darn tough. Either I dont go or I go in the condition I am in. It looks like I'm gonna stay home, I was planning on being here for at least 7 days anyway.  Thanks for the kind words everyone.

[ImDONENoMore]

Have you tried b-12 yet?  The sublingual tablets that melt under your tongue - they worked so well for me for energy maybe it would help you?  :)

[IBKleen]

Have you thought about getting into an outside support group? You are learning first hand how evil the mental side of this disease is. I hate to see you throw it away and want for you to stay on track. Doing on your own without the tools to help you stay clean is dangerous. There is an old saying: "I can't WE can".

Hang in there.

[rockbottom1970]

I'm collecting information about some kind of aftercare although not as aggressively pursuing it yet because i'm still early in my WD's.  I definately need after care, this is very important to me this time because I need to release some underlying issues that keep haunting me.  I will try the b12, If its different than the B6 because I do have B6.  Thanks for the advice, your time is appreciated.

[Baker3336]

Maybe you'll feel great tomorrow and want to get out for a bit. I've been off the norcos for 11 days and I decided to go out tonight to watch a little NCAA basketball. I saw a bunch of people I haven't seen in a while. I did drink some beers but I'm not quitting that, but it was fun and took my mind off that other crap. Just try not to think to far into the future. Just decide tomorrow how ya feel. Maybe I'm wrong but I feel like I still have to live and not shelter myself, I feel better when I'm out doing ****..I had a good evening now I'm home with my kids and just chillin..it sounds like u have some pills laying around or real easy access to them. That's a recipe for disaster IMO. Let us know what u decided to do. Good luck and try to go see your kid play it could be good for the soul..

[Ballgame]

7 year olds play a best of 7 series? Geez

[rockbottom1970]

I gotta love the sarcasm Ballgame, just what I need right now (unless I'm reading it wrong) but In CANADA, our kids are playing a best 2 out of 3 in the SEMI-FINALS and FINALS, Not a BEST of SEVEN as you read.  Read it again if you wish but slower. This is not U.S. minor league baseball rules, which may be different.  

As to your question Baker, I dont have any pills lying around but I do have easy access to them from a couple of people, not good I know. Thanks for the advice and congratulations on 11 days.  Will let those who care what i decide to do.

[Baker3336]

Keep us posted. Most of us care.. I don't know what ballgames deal is. Whatever...I am in the same boat, I don't have any pills at home but if I wanted some I could have them tomorrow. It's ***** enough that I can just go see a dr feelgood and get z script but also make a couple calls and hook up. It shouldn't be this easy to get prescription drugs. That's one of the main reasons so many get hooked on these f'in things. They are everywhere. You can get em just as easy as a bag of weed. It's crazy..ya(all of us) just need to be strong and we can kick it. I just keep thinking positive thoughts.. As soon as I think about negative things I just try to think about things that mean alot to me..family, music, friends,etc..I don't know your whole situation but me personally just tries to remember that I went over 95% of my life without these things, I can go without them for the rest of my life. I might sound kinda cheesy but I don't care. I'm starting to feel pretty good about myself on night 11 without norcos. I know it's early but I'm doing it. Get angry at the meds, it helps me. Anyway , I'm rambling on. Love these forums, helped me alot so far. I'll keep checking them for a long time to come. Thanks all..

[rockbottom1970]

Thanks for your words, my story will be told as I get to feel better, I feel I need to get off my chest just to take a load off.  Your so right about finding these things, they are everywhere, even if the guys I know are not around I can drive somewhwere else and get em it just costs more.  Thats messed up my friend.  This is why I've been an addict for 8 years now, its too easy to get. Anyway good luck again and Congrats on 11 days.  See you around.

[Firebiz]

Hi all. Glad I found this forum. I have been taking two to three 7.5-750 for almost two years. I had no idea that I was becoming physically addicted to this stuff. The doctor provided no information, just kept refilling the script.

Then, last Saturday I ran out of the drug. I thought, no big deal, I'll get it filled Monday. Didn't fill it. By Tuesday, I started feeling nervous, anxious and wanted to run away from myself. I had wave after wave of panic attacks. Then that night I could only sleep for about an hour at a time. Then it felt like some one had slapped me awake. Back to the panic attacks and wave after of wave of being anxious. The next day more of the same. I couldn't figure out what was wrong with me. I thought I was going crazy or something. Then it hit me. The only thing in my life that had changed was that I was not on my drug. I started reading and found so many people suffering with this. I phoned my doctor and did an office visit. He scheduled some blood work and asked me if I wanted off the stuff? He was willing to continue the drug if I wanted to. I said I wanted off. He said I was already past the worst.

To day is day 4 and I have had two nights of unrestful sleep amounting to about 5 hours each night. I am still having panic attacks and am somewhat anxious. The attacks don't last as long as they did, but they still happen. I keep telling myself that I am just suffering withdrawal and not going crazy and this will all be over soon. I have to force myself to eat and drink. I just don't want any food or water.

This is going to be over soon and I am going to feel better. Right?

[rockbottom1970]

I am on day 4 of quitting CT and I felt everything you felt and more, from the advice I've been getting is the worst is over for you.  Everything you're still feeling is normal and part of the process.  Lack of sleep, restlessness, appetite etc. will all return in time.  What you can do is post your own thread with the same questions and you will get a ton of advice and support from people who know more than I do.  Copy and paste the same thing you asked but click on the Green "Post A Question" Icon near the top and more experienced members will be glad to help.  good luck and feel free to ask for more info.

[gullysquid]

O was gonna suggest to stay home but looks like you made your mind up. I've had similar situations and I think I went to one event,it just depends on how you feel. But I've read your posts since day one,GREAT WORK!!! Your getting closer and closer. Is it possible you go to the game but sit where you cant really be noticed and leave as soon as it ends. Get in,get out. Just an option but being clean is priority one. Keep it up,your motivating me!

[gullysquid]

Oh and the diarrhea. I got this bad. I took these pills to stop from being in the bathroom all the time. Just regular diarrhe pills but like someone said Immodium works great

[rockbottom1970]

You have been inspiring me as well, that is a very good idea to avoid the main crowd and still be there.  No one can complain if I do that and then I don't have to feel the anxiety of being around the "main Crowd" but I can still talk to my little man about the game he played, even take some pics to prove it and remember it. Your  response has just put a charge in me gully, gone is the "what to do" and now Its replaced with a very good solution.  Thank you soooo much I think I really just made up my mind, I just hope I can get some rest tonite, Thank you so much again you may be my saviour!

[gnarly_1]

Hey dude congrats on 4 days you should be coming out of it here shortly .....sleep may be a problem for a wile but with time it will return just keep pushing forward get plugged into some form of aftercare and you can begin to heal good luck and God bless.....Gnarly

[rockbottom1970]

I always love reading your comments to everyone,  I'm thankful you post on mine, You are so right about sleep but I will trade it with the rest of the WD's I went through any time.  Aftercare is essential to my sobriety, I see it now...I have alot of stuff I have been carrying around and it is time I let go of it.  I'm feeling really good tonite even though I am tired as heck but I see things getting better.  I am watching my son play hockey tomorrow with a suggestion from a fellow member that should take away all the anxiety I felt about going to the game before.  People here are truly great and you are one of them, I read alot of your comments and you are truly an unselfish person to give up your time in order to help those in need.  Thank you Gnarly and keep doing what your doing!  I hope i can keep going cz I dont want to let you and those like you down.  

[gnarly_1]

Thanks....I always ask God b/4 I go on here at night......if I can just help one it will be worth it to me....hang in there your going to make it....and living in recovery life becomes a beautiful place once again...........Gnarly

[Dave1963]

Hey brother, glad to see you made it to Day 4...AWESOME JOB !!!!  Both of our situations were very similar, WD's alone.  You are doing so good and from reading your post on Day 1 to now, you are definitately starting to think clearer.  Stay strong my brother and we will all get through this.  You're a good man and I'm sure an even better dad.  I have a son in hockey myself.  When times get tough think to your kids and what we HAVE MISSED because of these drugs.  That should inspire the hell out of you, it does me.  Call and talk to them, when things get tough, hearing my sons voice makes my spirits soar.  Good luck buddy and remember you have many friends here who care about your recovery.  God Bless...Dave

[rockbottom1970]

Thanks for the kind words, you are right I am feeling better, thinking clearer.  I actually got back from my kids game, thank god I went, the little guy scored both his teams goals.  I'm so emotional at this stage I started to cry a bit.  They ultimately lost 3-2 with the other team scoring the winner with 40 sec. left on the clock, heartbreaker!  It was good to get out but, to be honest, I'm really relieved to be back home.  I feel very vulnerable outside right now.  In my home,  I feel safe.  Fighting cravings today as well, this is where I have to buckle down because I've always relapsed between day 5 - 7, I'm almost at day 5 now.  Have to work on some aftercare to keep this ball rolling.  Thanks again Dave, everything you said about the kids is so very true.  They truly deserve the best.  Good luck to you to and God bless you as well....K.J.

[IBKleen]

Glad to see you got out and about. You will have to learn to live your life without the use of drugs at some point so if it is baby steps for now, that is okay too.

Clear your head--you mentioned a few times that this is right around the point that you relapsed. Stop thinking that. THIS one is different, right?

And we chatted briefly about aftercare. I think it would be in your best interest to join a support group, be around other recovering people and learn how to live life on life's terms. Doing this on your own is hard, I know, and each time I tried it without help, I failed. I just don't want to see you go through it if you don't have to---and you surely don't have to!! Please think about it.

In the meantime, hang in there.

[gnarly_1]

HEy ....dude glade to see your making it.....im with IBK that this time is different dont read failure into it ....use your past experences as learning lessons of what not to do....with a little work on your part you can learn to live in recovery this drug dosent have to control your life
I can relate to the tears I was an emotional reck when I came off methadone just know this is normalfor coming off narcotic...we been numb so long it your feelings coming back on line
now that your feeling a bit better now would be a good time to google N/A meetings in your area and get to one....it will help you threw what your going threw you should be threw the worst of it physically now come the mental mind screw you will need help with that I wish you all the luck in the world on your recovery become pro/active in it and you will be successful
keep posting to let us know how your doing God bless.....Gnarly  

[gullysquid]

Thats awesome your kid scored the goals! Thank you for one of the best compliments I've ever received but really its going both ways or to all of us. If we all can help each other, then help others then I think we are doing good. Its so nice to hear from people that feel the same way I do and wanting to live a sober life more than anything. Your sounding better and better every day,seriously. It may sound lame and its hard to read msgs the way their meant to sound but you seem more and more positive. One thing Ive noticed about practically everyone on these forums are, they are fed up with this BS drug addiction. I use to tell my friends I hate drugs so much! Or things dealing with just one more time,"Bro I don't think its a big deal at all,your weird bro" I'm just so fed up with being drugs b*****. That life is horrible! Even when you take something it still *****. I would feel worthless when I did take something. Its just gonna take some time to get back to that normal feeling,consistently. Oh and I always try and cry in the shower. Most of the time I don't get results but I want to get those sad feelings out of me so I try to let it all out there so your emotions to me are %100 normal. You got alot of things to look forward to man,its awesome. I kinda don't. I mean i'm a semester away from graduating college but I need something to look forward too. Like moving to my families country and a whole new change in my life. I tell myself "Gullysquid(real name of course) 2.0 is coming in just a couple weeks,new and improved" Keep it up bro. Great news to see you going to the game was a success.

[rockbottom1970]

It's good to hear from you.  Thank you for the suggestion you gave me about the game.  It was a good day.  The kids (i have a daughter too) and the ex ended up coming over later that aftrnoon.  It was great.  I owe you some credit for that because I wasn't even going to go to the game.  You are right about so many things when you talk about these drugs.  People are fed up!  I know I am.  I've read a lot of anger in some posts when people refer to their addictions.  You are also right about me, I am feeling better everday, just like everyone told me I will.  I still have my moments emotionally and the lack of sleep is still there but now I just acceppt it for what it is, I know it's all part of the process.  

As for you, how can you say you don't have things to look forward to?  You just mentioned three in your post, your going to graduate, your going back to your family and you are going to experience the new and improved Gullysquid. Your also relatively young, You have your whole life ahead of you and I'm sure things will pop up along the way.  

Your a good man Gully, keep up the good work and don't forget the goal we all are trying to reach, I'm sure you'll get there.  Good luck....K.J.