lonely

[angrycat42]

I just celebrated a year clean in September. Being in recovery can be such a lonely place.
Dont get me wrong, life is good,real good. As we move away from people,places, and things,the people who are good for your recovery dwindle in number. Im active in a program, but its hard to trust other women. I guess what im asking is where and what are good chat sites for women to talk??

[clean_in_ks]

First of all, CONGRATS ON ONE YEAR CLEAN!!!!! (plus 2 mos probably)
Good on ya!
I had more of a problem trusting men, than women.  Then I find out it's not really one sex or the other.  It's just humans!  We are all going to fail and hurt someone sometime in our lives.  I had to quit putting "people" whether a male or a female up on this pedestal.  Instead I put my higher power (for me that is God) on the pedestal. Humans are just that, human, and whether we are clean or not, we will always hurt those we love, not intentionally, but just cause we're are fallible.  
I went to all women's meeting where I could observe, listen to, and learn from many, many women.  I started to like women I never thought I would just by listening and learning.  
Do you have a sponser?  Do you physically go anywhere with recovering friends?  Or do you have any recovering friends?  
Sorry to bombard you with questions, but if you try being around women  whose goal in life is to stay clean, maybe you will find some women that you feel safe with.  It's a process too, I think, but obviously you've been hurt deeply by a woman or women in your life.  The only way you can heal that is to give it a try now that you are clean.  I think you will be pleasantly surprised.  I've met some FAB women here!!!
Welcome to this forum----hang around and I think you'll make some good female friends right here to start with!
Blessings to you~

[dominosarah]

Congrats on a year clean!  That is a great accomplishment!  

This is a great site for support.  We also have a social side too.  Stick around, you will like it here.

[angrycat42]

Thanks for responding. This seems like a great site to meet ppl.
Sometimes its nice to hear a new voice. At least i know im not alone. Keep in
Touch!

[nonsmom]

I have only been a member of this site for 4 (maybe 5?) days now, I have found a number of wonderfully, caring, supportive people to talk to.  I am actually really shocked, and pleased that this forum is so great.
Hope you find what you're looking for.  :)

[Teresa1717]

We definitely tend to isolate when were active in our addictions and then again in recovery! Both for different reasons. I have recently been FORCING myself to get out and reconnect with sober friends as well as making new sober friends. Its not easy because for so many years I knew a completely different life than I am starting to build now. But this new life is far more rewarding!

I guess my question for you is why dont you trust other women?? You said you are active in a program, what about making friends there?

I know that this forum has been fantastic for me and I have met some really amazing people on here (not in person of course) and it was a HUGE start for me to learn how to connect with sober people which of course has helped me in making sober friends in person. I would say stick around here for a  bit, I think you might find some great people on here to talk with! I know I have! :)

Good luck and Welcome!

[snowflake24]

I totally agree with you.......i had to move almost 6 states away to be clean.....knew too many hookups, ect...been clean now for 29 days off of methadone......im a likeable, nice person too but I get lonely......i figuire its better to have no friends, than the wrong ones,,,,so Im lonely....just be patient. We will meet people in time......have you thought about checking dating websites? they arent really my thing but maybe you could meet people that way....good luck. Try to be patient. All good things come to those who wait!!!! LOL