Helping my community SOBER.U can get&STAY CLEAN

[overopiates]

I live n a town right outside of Hattiesburg called Petal in Mississippi.We have a vicious storm&a couple streets over there r homes gone.To the ground from the tornados that hit this week.Im blessed our home is ok but both cities have been visited from fema and declared a disaster.I decided to help as much as I can as Ive never lived n a small town til now and they really come together.We donated cloths,dishes,my4r old even kindly donated lots of toys and2bikes for kids who lost their stuff.I love to cook&have been making lots of food families have been so appreciative.That being said I feel great helping my community&have been out and about helping with anything they need.I have bumbed into 5people who I knew and hadnt seen or talked to since I quit.People who lost everything and the1st thing they say(before hi or how is your family)do u have some pills cause they r so stressed or whatever.I say i quit a long time ago.Then I have people begging me to help them find some.They have money from the bank or a paycheck and rather than worrying about their kids,a place to sleep or bare basics they want to spend there last dime on stupid pills.I had1person tha said Im happy u quit and didnt continue all the rest well lets just say they dont have respect for an addict quitting.I had a man offer me pills AFTER I said I hadnt taken any in so long because as he said Im doing a lot I could use the energy from them.All I can say is if u r struggling,planning to quit or freshly clean and sober ALL OF THE STRUGGLES ARE BEYOND WORTH IT.I am so happy that Im not in the deeps of my addiction and using because I would be searching or popping pills instead of helping my community.I know if I was still using  I would b just like those few I encounted.Im no better by far just in recovery and able to focus on whats important.I wrote this as an experience so those wondering if its really worth it.IT IS.I wouldve never been doing this without a ton of pills for the energy cause I was strung out.U WILL get to a place where u feel better physically,are mentally so strong and out of that prison of pills.U can do this.Just thought I would share.KEEP ON TRYING U WILL GET THERE!!

[overopiates]

Nighthawk 1st ur screen name is kick a$$!!!Im glad u liked my post.Ive gotten such amazing responses from so many people.All of u have really made me feel so great w/all ur kind words.u all have become like a family2me.Like my blood related family some of u r crazy(n an awesome way).But the best part is that I know I can b100%honest here,ask ANYTHING&I get just that and to boot ur all so supportive.im so glad Im apart of this community

[Nighthawk61]

What an incredible story, thank so much to your whole family for helping out in your community as you are. We are all learning, and your example is a good one and so needed.  Thanks for such an uplifting post, and I'm sending my prayers your way.

[overopiates]

Well I dnt know if u r my mind twin or what but u described EXACTLY the scenario I was thinking for talking2him/her/them(by no means am I going2seek them out) but as of late I am seeing them because Im all over our little community everyday.Also I want to share MY story w/them(if the opportunity arises that is).Just tell them this DOESNT HAVE TO BE YOUR LIFE.Also I have come2know a lot of resouces I could pass on for recovery.I just want thes people to know that the"life"they r living well it isnt a life or at least not a good1especially compared to sobriety.That freedom I feel unlike the pills(all addicts whether alcohol,drugs or both)whatever ur addiction is like having shackles on ur feet as u live n ur own prison,the person u really are thats locked n a basement w/tape over ur mouth,the constant worry&stress but thats about ur addiction99%of the time instead of the real things like family,friends just life.Im so happy I no longer go through"the motions of life".Im Living and loving life&I just want everyone here w/us doing the same

[vicki595]

I don't think it's out of line but I'm not sure about going out of your way to contact them...it would depend on how well you knew them...But, certainly offering to talk about what you've been through and offering your support would be great when you bump into these folks in town, like you did over the weekend.   I guess I'd keep it casual and see just who's interested...people may begin to contact you! You never know...my little Mother Theresa! xoxo

[overopiates]

I asked this question but I think no1saw it because the post was so far back.Its the question diretly above about maybe speaking w/some of the people who r still NOT taking but severely abusing pills.Please give me ur opinion

[overopiates]

QUESTION TO ALL:Do u think I should find a way2contact these people,speak w/them,share my whole"journey.Not push just let them know they can get to where we all r&Im here if they want to make a change or is that out of line/NOT MY PLACE???

[overopiates]

Vicki1st kisses sweetie.MORE IMPORTANT lobster.GENIOUS.Cnt believe I didnt think of that.DEFINITELY doing it.As n I wanna eat that RIGHT NOW.Thank u4the tip.I did put3different cheeses n mine,cut chunks of some of the ham&broccoli n1pan of it.But yup we r celebrating on the21st4valentines day(since all thats been going on).U just made my menu much better.MMMM.
U said what I couldnt quite verbalize perfectly.I genuinely feel that way&I do pray that others will get inspired2help but even more important I hope I can c just1of those people a few months from now excited they r clean&sober.love u vicki.ur a true blessing

[vicki595]

You'll like this...the real cheese makes it so creamy and yummy but it's expensive between the cheese and the lobster...and it doesn't taste anything like Kraft mac&cheese!   I want some NOW!   LOL

[clean_in_ks]

DELISHHHHH CIOUS......Thank you.... I'm gonna give it a go when I can.
I ate basic, easy, (not make your own) M&C while zoned out on opiates......and then after w/drawals.....it tasted ca-ca to my tastebuds (lol)
Now.....I'm craving it again....and yor recipe teases my pleasure centers hahaha!

[vicki595]

  
   ;)

[ricart70]

lol

[vicki595]

Ric...Come on...really??  You silly!  You'd eat it if I made it! It's good....

[ricart70]

those poor little lobbies

[vicki595]

Really? You want it?  It's just like it sounds...Mac and cheese from scratch and toss in the lobster chunks!  It's really delicious...

I use small shell pasta instead of elbows-
3 different cheeses, 4 oz each, one should be white cheddar and I use gruyere and Jarlsburg.
I make one cup of white sauce with flour and milk, salt and pepper. Pour that over the cooked pasta, get it hot and mix in the chunked cheese. Keep stirring!
I use fresh lobster tails because that's all I can get here but any chunked lobster meat is perfect. I get 5 lobster tails, cook 'Em up, shell 'Em, and mix the chunks in last to the mac and cheese. It looks nice all mixed in!

I put it in individual bowls, homemade bread crumbs on top, and bake it for 10 minutes before eating.  It's really filling and now I think I need to make this tomorrow! YUM!  

[clean_in_ks]

Hey, Vicki...you got my mouth watering.....how bout posting your M&C w/lobster recipe in one of your journals or something, huh?  Please?

[vicki595]

You know, Sweetheart, there's a saying that goes something like: " For those who are given much...much is expected"...

What you've been writing about illustrates that perfectly...you're giving to others as was given to you.  It's a great thing and I know it's a glorious feeling to give back and help others.  I'm still so proud of you and love you and I'm so glad you've stuck around here...

and the Mac and cheese was PERFECT!
I make it from scratch,too, and you know the kids just love it! I add lobster to it if you ever want to try something DIVINE!

Your family and your community is lucky to have you there !

[overopiates]

Clean.THANK U SO MUCH.That post means A LOT more than u know.When I was using I would suck up ANY praise(didnt get much if any though unless I was working an angle)but the real me is I guess a little modest.Dnt get me wrong I quite enjoy compliments as most people,especially women do but I still smile&giggle when my husband says Im beautiful or funny or well u get it.I think even this long being sober Im still getting used to the real me,that Im a good person,that I want to help people and unlike my addict behavior I do it because it makes me happy not because Im getting something for it or working an angle like I did for years.Wow I just saved@least$100 on therapy cause I think I had a breakthrough lol.

[overopiates]

Imdone THANK U SO MUCH.What a compliment :-)
Brightfutureahead I sure hope some of them who r stuck do c there is a light at the end of the tunnel.I 100% not only understand what u r saying about pretending to b fine but a wreck inside searching for my next pill.U literally described exactly how I used to feel all the time.Always ashamed,mad at myself,so disappointed&I would think every single day&I remember n the shower daily saying out loud"this isnt what my life was supposed to this isnt how Im supposed to turn out".Wow hadnt thought about that(or thought it or said it in so long THANK GOD).I love that last sentence u wrote.I will try my best to shine on.I want my son to know his light will burn bright and I want to teach him the right way to live,help,be selfless&giving but most important dnt judge because u NEVER know what someone else is going through even if they r smiling often they smile through tears.
vvic YUP we were right on the same train of thought.U seem very smart btw.So many dnt realize addiction is a real disease and like cancer if u dnt treat it then it will eat u up from the inside out.
Vicki my love well the town had a dinner for those displaces by the storm and anyone n our little city that wanted to sit with there neighbors ,family amd friends.I made mac and cheese from scratch for the first time.I made3casselrole dishes,I went last night and got a Paula Dean ham from costco&2chickens.The meat is easy2cook&ALL of it was a HUGE hit.That was the cheesiest mac&cheese&so hearty/filling.I was so flattered all the compliments.I had lots of parents say how great the mac&cheese was,but the best part is all the kids who loved it(u know kids they r almost always picky,brutally honest&usually thats a crowd pleaser w/em).I really love that a few hours of my time cooking(which I absolutely LOVE to do anyway seemed like the highlight of these great peoples day.My husband loves this cause as he said"I feel like its Thanksgiving everyday for the last few days&all I have2do is carry the cooked food to the car and inside the church".Anyway sorry to go on so long Im just so touched(n tears right now actually)that my support system here,the people who helped me from day one&kept me on this path have such nice things to say to me.Love u all dearly

[clean_in_ks]

You have mentioned twice that you don't want to be misunderstood as bragging.....YOU AREN'T and we don't perceive it that way AT ALL...K?.......you are "passing it on", sharing some more newfound joys of being clean, encouraging others, helping us to remember, expressing your gratitude........letting us know there really is a life to be cherished after drugs and what that can look like.  I thank you so much for that!

Please know you are worthy of our praise......the fragrance of your heart is sweet~

[overopiates]

Im overwhelmed by all of ur kind words.It puts a huge smile on my face and my husband said Im blushing lol.He read all the comments from all of my wonderful fellow worriorsof sobriety&said how amazing u all r(HE IS100% right btw).He has never really looked on here&said he totally gets why I stick around after all this time.I hope u all know I didnt post this as if I were bragging/looking for praise for what Im doing as its quite the opposite.Im stunned&impressed@the whole community&thrilled I can b a part of it.

[VICourageous]

Your comment was GREAT right to the point. That is what they say on the info I talked about. Its no different then having cancer, diabeatis, ect We do have a disease of addiction.....
vvic

[vicki595]

Thanks for the sweet words Honey, I appreciate it.  So, what are you cooking up today??

[Brightfutureahead]

Great Post!  Its nice that your son is sharing in this experience as well. Reading about your perspective, and all of the good that you are doing, brought a smile to my face.

Keep doing what you're doing- lead by example. Recovery is very attractive.  I'm sure even if it doesn't seem like it, some of those people are watching you- they want what you have.

I remember feeling stuck and hopeless. I would put on such a front. On the outside, i was just dine. On the inside, I was crumbling. I would look at people doing 'normal' things (cooking, enjoying family get togethers sober, sports, etc) and be so envious of the fact they weren't searching and scheming to pump themselves full of drugs. Now, with help, I've climbed back up and brushed myself off (like many of us!!). There are some people around me (acquaintances, not really 'friends', and a few family members) that I know struggle with pills. I just keep setting a good example and saying a prayer or too, in hopes that someone else decides to dig their heels in deep and do some work!


You are like a lighthouse at night- surrounded by the daunting sea. Shine on my friend!

[ImDONENoMore]

Wow.  Powerful story.  And a sad one.  I can't even begin to imagine walking around, in such despair over such great losses, and to be thinking only of finding more pills?  That makes me sick to my stomach and beyond sad.

But vicki's right.  You are beautiful.