Help-Percocet addiction

[c515]

I am 23 years old. I just graduated college and am currently looking for a full time job. Throughout my life, I have messed around with different drugs, dipped and dabbled, yet nothing ever compared to the opiates for me. It all began when I was around 17, I had my tonsils removed. I knew from that moment on that I had loved the feeling it gave me. From about 17-22 I was on and off, never considered myself an "addict." I thought to myself, how could this be? I am a nursing student, college athlete (captain) and have the respect of everyone around me. Yet right before me 23rd birthday things took a turn for the worst. I just got kicked out of nursing school and was in an abusive relationship. I was living with a man who hit me. Why I stayed for the 3 mths that I did I have no clue, I have a huge loving supportive family, a great reputation and much respect. I think that was the Main reason that I had stayed, I feel as if I didn't want anyone to know that I was not in control. On top of all that, my birthday comes around and my grandmother passed away on the same day. Since then, I have been taking percocets again to deal with everything. I am out of that relationship, have been for almost a year now, January will be 1 year that I am away from that situation. But January will also be 1 full year of 60-90 mgs a day of percocets for me. I just got laid off and cannot afford my habit any longer.I am upset at the fact that I am out of work, yet I feel as if it was a blessing in disguise. I was making about 2000 a week in cash tax free and have not a dollar in savings to show for it. Although I have a nice brand new car, that's the only thing. The rest went to my habit (some occasional clothes and makeup too) Knowing this, I have used my last 3 pills to start tapering down. No relief. One minute I'm sweating, the next freezing. My feet are cold, legs are sweaty. I feel nervous, anxious, depressed and restless. This is the first time that I am telling anyone other than my current boyfriend (who has been my angel sent to me) about my story. I came across this website and saw all the support and others with similiar stories. Any suggestions for me? I do not want to go to a inpatient rehab, (I am embarrassed in a way I think that such a "standout" person who seemed to "have it all" could have such a demon in their closet) yet I am scared to death about seizures, etc. I have about 7 mgs left for tomorrow and that is it. Just typing that right now just gave me such a feeling of anxiety. Please help.

[febninthgirl]

If you want this you can beat it. You will feel flu like symptoms for about a week. You sound like a strong girl anyone who can stay in abusive relationship and get out says a lot. You have a lot going for you. Pls get some after care and work on the reasons for your additions. Stay strong and hang in there

[shrimpman]

I just went through wd from 120 to 8omg of perc and I'm 52yrs old-----YOU can do this----yes it will suck but if you really want to quit you can-----tapering for me just prolonged the discomfort .  I followed the Thomas recipe and it helped me greatly---------- not telling you to use it--------you can find it on this site and make your choice to use it or not------Keep posting and you will get help here------I'm 20 days clean after 7yrs-----Shrimpman : )

[Charetti]

When I first found this site my main concern was admitting that I could be an addict.  I am also a person that no one would suspect.  I have a good job, a family, a house, etc.  What I found out was that there are hundreds of people on here with the same problem.  Pain pills are by far more abused than any other drug, and its extremely common for regular folks to fall victim to it.

I have not told my family, but I have talked to my doctor about my problems and she is helping me get off them. Please dont get caught up in believing you are weak or a failure for this. It is a genuine problem and no reason to be shameful.  Of course we all have to admit that our addictions have made us do things we normally wouldnt do, but then you have to move on and fnd a solution.

I hope you find the strength that you need to get past this challenge. Keep reading and posting, you will find so much here!

[gizzy32]

First of all addiction does not care who you are or what you do or how much you make. It can happen to anyone and many of us here "had it all" too, I was living a dream before it got me.  Like mentioned above normally the worst of the w/d's will last 4-6 days, but everyone is different. You can find the thomas recipe in the top right of this page under health pages, it can help with w/d's. Some people use hylands restful leg tablets to help with the rls. Hot baths are good too. Also melatonin can help with sleep and you can buy that almost anywhere.

Congrats on wanting to get off these pills, it's worth it to get our lives back:) Best of luck and keep posting. Hope you feel better soon, you can do this.