Hydrocodone addiction, desperately need help!..

[Cjwillingham94]

My names Chris and I'm 20 years old with 2 beautiful daughters and an amazing girlfriend of 4 years, I have been taken them daily for about 3 years now,  taken about 5 to 8 this past year,  I'm spending so much money on them,  and losing everything I feel like,  I lose every job I get because I feel like I have to have them to work,  or to do anything!!  I feel socially awkward without them,  and unmotivated and just unhappy period,  but I'm not happy on them anymore either!  I recently tried to quit but ended up breaking and getting some and lied to my girlfriend cause I didn't want to let her down because she was so proud of me :( and soon I'm going to lose her over them to!  She is dying for me to quit just as bad, but she Is all I have...  My mom and dad both get them heavily prescribed and I break and get some from them..  My Brother sister and cousins take them as well,and I really don't have any friends or no will power! Im really depressed at this time and I don't know where to turn or what to do and I really just wish I had someone to talk to I guess is why I'm posting cause I feel really depressd and alone..  My girlfriend believes in tough love and just wants me to quit period not understanding how so very hard it is for me!!  I'm in a constant cycle,  I'm just working to buy pills,  and enough to get by, we don't have a house we stay with her grandma (pathetic  I know)  and car is broken down and I feel like Im in in prison and I want out so bad!  Can someone please help me

[msdelight]

Google stuff when you get home with that precious baby. Some folks on here like to go a town or two over just to be discreet.  The main thing is that you formulate a plan, and execute it. We will all help.  I was thinking about your situation, and it occurred to me that people addicted to alcohol have easy access to booze and yet they manage to quit. I don't think your situation is hopeless at all. I know you can do this!

[Cjwillingham94]

Thank you really does mean a lot.. And yes I do love my girls! And my lady cuz she is the only one there,  I can't blame her for getting upset with me the way she does because she doesn't understand..  And I'm thinking when I get sober,  (really small town)  but I work at the local hospital so got free membership to a gym was thinking about that as a way to spend some time. .  And I can't quit dreaming!  So many other things life offers..  But anyways I get off at 2 30 And have to get my youngest and take care of her before I even walk in the door so if I can organize something out I could hopefully do something more productive in that time eventually.. Thank you again ms very much

[msdelight]

Life is a constant journey into the unknown. Wherever you're at today, don't let go of the dream. Your journey is your journey, and I believe you have the power to do it. You seem like a fine young man, sticking with your daughters and your gf. Not all men are brave enough to do that. My dad split when I was 2, and I cannot tell you the long term damage that does to a girl. .
Anyway, your challenge is even more difficult because of your family .. my heart goes out to you. However, your situation is not impossible. I don't suggest NA to everyone (anyone usually) but in your situation it sounds like you should at least check it out.  You need sober friends and activities.  That down time between 3 and 530 would be a great time to attend a meeting and also get in a good workout.  Is there a YMCA or college gym u could use? Aso,you don't have to be sober to hit the meeting. You just have to want to stop being addicted.  Wishing you peace today. Stay with us, k?

[Cjwillingham94]

Hi ms delight I'm fine thanks.  I have not posted,  but have not going anywhere,  I still constantly read on here to keep my hope and dreams going.  Thanks for Checking,  I have been meaning to post an update but I'm still where I don't need to be,  and I just don't want to look stubborn,  won't quit trying  though, and I know I can do it..  I have just been having so much trouble lately with everything my mind can't hardly just take it all in at once,  but I am going one step at a time one day and won't quit till I'm where I wanna be thanks for the posts and concern

[msdelight]

Hey Chris, just wondering how you are today. I'm hoping you will come back, whether you have taken anything or not. So I'm bumping this up to current. Please check back in soon.

[NeverAgain127]

Honey, there is no reason for you to leave here.    Please, don't go.

We've all been where you are and we know what usually works, that's all.   If you want this bad enough, you'll get it.  But there lies the rub:  are you willing to to do WHATEVER it takes to get off the pills and lead a happy sober life?  

If that whatever means going to n/a, are you willing to do it?

We've all tried to use our willpower to just muscle through and not take the drugs any more.  For a very small percentage of us, it works.  But the vast majority can't.  It's a disease, not a question of will power.   And I don't know why support groups work, but they just DO.  

I really hope you don't stop trying to quit, and you'll consider what I'm saying...we are all here for you, me included.  My comment was not meant to to be offensive...

Hugs,
-Robin