Hydrocodone withdrawal

[shelliAS]

Hi, I have not posted in a long time.  Back in August 2010, I did a cold turkey w/d from tramadol and hydrocodone.  I have had chronic back pain for years, and have been epiduraled, trigger point injected, facet joint injected, x-rayed, MRI'd, chiropractered, acupunctured, etc etc etc - none of which ever resulted in either a solid diagnosis nor pain relief.  The meds were a last line resort.  I have been on them for a few years.  I have observed that my mental functioning is no longer sharp, resulting in some very embarrassing moments at work, and I began to just not feel very good.  I blamed it all on a series of traumas in my life over a short time span; but I also suspected the meds.  So I made a decision to just stop.  I went by the Thomas recipe.  Although I had no psychological cravings for the drugs, my pain level increased initially (which I knew would happen), then seemed to decrease for awhile, then returned back to its former state.  But the most disturbing part of the w/d was the fatigue.  It was absolutely devastating.  Just brushing my teeth wore me out.  Even after a month, the fatigue persisted with no end in site.  I finally reached the end of my rope and took a hydrocodone and I got my energy back.  But soon after I went into a horrifying clinical depression.  It took a long time to get it under control, but my doc finally found an antidepressant that kicked in.  I forgot to mention that I did not touch the tramadol again.  That stuff is evil.
So, I am back on hydro, and tho I have energy for a couple of hours after I take one, it quickly wears off, the back pain returns, and I feel horrible again.  I want to stop the hydro and confront my pain doc and tell her to diagnose my back pain and do something about it besides throwing drugs at me.  But I am terrified of going off the hydro.  After doing it before, my experience was awful.  I would definitely taper it this time, but I am still frightened of the fatigue and depression.  I am about to start a new business venture, and I need to be healthy and well and feel good and energetic.  The fatigue was disabling - literally.  I would crawl out of the bathtub and then lay on the bathroom floor, unable to work up the energy to dry off.  I was not working at the time and was unable to look for work.  It took about 3 hours in the morning for me to get out of bed, get some breakfast, feed my animals, put on clothes, brush my teeth, etc.  I have not read of anyone on this forum having fatigue this bad after hydro w/d.  I need to get off this stuff - I know it is ruining me, and has probably inflicted some irreversible damage.  But I am unable to cope with the w/d.  I feel so hopeless.  I don't know what to do.  Can anyone help?
Shelli        

[ryenne]

i have just gone off of hydro (about 3 days ago) after pretty much a couple of years of straight use.  i was not taking a huge amount as i hear of - but 1/2 -1 tab of 10 mg/325 a day.  still, i decided to stop that as i was constantly on another pain med now and didn't want both.  but, i am so tired - so fatigued.  i thought it was from the flu i had recently and just getting over (and then started thinking the side effects also of tiredness, feeling strangely hyper (mentally) at the same time - including feeling as if I couldn't breathe deeply- was due to the flu and now I realize it is probably the hydro stoppage completely.  As I had gone down slowly - and then since it was just maybe 1/4 of 10 mg for last couple of days i took- i thought that i would have been weaned down sufficiently.  But, i realize now that your body gets used to (addicted to) the drug - regardless.  I just hate this feeling but i am going to keep going because i don't want to have to start over again.  after 2+ years - i want to know how i feel pain wise without it- and also just to get off it.  If you must take it for pain- then take it.  But without an official diagnosis - i'm like you- i never would take pain meds because no "official condition" - until a few years ago - finally fibro was diagnosed - but i also have deg disc, osteo -arth in low back, etc... but i want a baseline to judge where i am without these drugs - so i am beginning that process.  i lost my job, my life over these last 11 years - i want it back.  if that means i have to go back to the drugs because i am truly in need to control the pain- then so be it.  but i need to find that out- and know that i am doing everything else i can health-wise- eat/care for self - to deter that option.  then i can rest in peace with it if i have to go back to it.  massage has been so helpful to me - but i have done it all - and i do mean all- alternatively....so i'm hopeful this too shall pass - but i'm just so tired - so glad to know that it's hopefully a side effect of this drug withdrawl and eventually will pass - and i'm not dying from the flu or something else

[shelliAS]

Hi, Did you have any better luck combating the fatigue the second time?

Shelli

[shelliAS]

Thank you for your kind words.  I am impressed that you have toughed this out for half a year!  I was so disappointed that even after a month in, I felt worse than ever.  Meanwhile, when I would ask folks on this site how long their fatigue lasted, I would hear a few days or a couple of weeks.  As for the Thomas recipe, I gave up on it after that first month, which perhaps was a mistake.  Right now, I am at least taking L-Tyrosine first thing in the morning, along with my multivitamin, fish oil, DHEA, vitamin D, calcium, probiotics, etc etc.  I have had a lot of blood work done, but nothing comes up abnormal.  So I can only assume that it is the hydrocodone making me feel so awful.  I have been trying to do a little exercise although it wears me out.  I aim for 3 times a week on my treadmill, but in truth, I probably get on it more like twice a week.  

You mentioned that you still have an occasional day with fatigue.  Do you recall when you began to have more days without fatigue than with?  If I could at least see a light at the end of the tunnel, it would help.

Thanks, Shelli    

[Defcon]

I've tried to quit twice. The first time I was hardly able to walk to my vehicle without tiring.

[ImDONENoMore]

Hi shelli,

I'm so sorry you're suffering so much.  I know how awful the fatigue can get - that seems to be one of the biggest obstacles for us here and it seems that time is the only thing that changes that.

I've read up on withdrawal and recovery quite a bit and unfortunately, it is only time that seems to make things better.  I know this is an awful thing to hear (I remember! lol) that we have no choice but to wait it out, but that seems to be the case as it has in my situation as well.

I agree - tramadol IS evil - that was my DOC and I quit that and xanax on the same day over 190 days ago - it was the worst experience of my life and I still have days where my energy is low but I've just decided to ride it out - I just know I don't have another "quit" in me ya know?  But I applaud you for coming back here to find a way out of the vicious cycle of opiates.  And that's the problem when you start taking them again - they might feel at first that they're helping, but they're not right?  It just puts you right back where you started (I remember that too!)

I think talking to your pain Dr. is a great way to start - it's important to be honest with them or they won't be able to give you the help you'll need to get through this.  You mentioned that you tried the thomas recipe - did you stay on the vitamins and supplements all of this time because I've found they help enormously with the day in and day out feelings that recovery can bring on.  Tell me more about what other things you're doing and I'm sure many others here can help you through this as well.

I'll be rooting for you!  You CAN do this you really can.  And I can feel how much you want to quit - please stick around, posting and getting others perspectives was HUGE for my recovery and I'm sure it will be for you too.  :)