Aa
I HATE Being an Addict
I did not ask for this. I don't think I can go through with the effort it is taking to stay clean. I can feel great one moment and the next I am ready to go get some pills and just do it already. This is taking an ungodly amount of effort and I just don't know if I can do this. I know what they mean when they say this disease is fatal. I have been slowly killing myself with drugs and right now I don't even care. This sux.
have u tried methadone? im on it for pill addiction but my friend has been on it for yrs for herion addiction she goes to the clinic everyday.i myself have methadone pills this is day 2 for me it seems to be working some she said we would up it if i need it.i was on morphine ,oxys ect.i have percacet for breakthrough pain. i was gonna tried the suboxone and they said it wasnt right for me cuz id still be in pain i was in a bad accident.i tried stopping everything for 3 days and the doctor said it could of killed me.the reason is i been on pills a long time and im also a dibetic but when i stop the pills sunday i started withdrawing really bad and i couldnt eat id thrown up and so i could take my insilin and pills because i was so sick and i was in bad shape this wedesday when i went there they immedialy told me to take a pill and that evening i started feeling a lil bit better.yesterday i felt alot better.today im feeling ok kind of sick but im trying to adjust to the methadone.i know im rambaling .trying to explain and trying to help.
have u tried methadone? im on it for pill addiction but my friend has been on it for yrs for herion addiction she goes to the clinic everyday.i myself have methadone pills this is day 2 for me it seems to be working some she said we would up it if i need it.i was on morphine ,oxys ect.i have percacet for breakthrough pain. i was gonna tried the suboxone and they said it wasnt right for me cuz id still be in pain i was in a bad accident.i tried stopping everything for 3 days and the doctor said it could of killed me.the reason is i been on pills a long time and im also a dibetic but when i stop the pills sunday i started withdrawing really bad and i couldnt eat id thrown up and so i could take my insilin and pills because i was so sick and i was in bad shape this wedesday when i went there they immedialy told me to take a pill and that evening i started feeling a lil bit better.yesterday i felt alot better.today im feeling ok kind of sick but im trying to adjust to the methadone.i know im rambaling .trying to explain and trying to help.
hi I'am exectly where you are i have my first meeting tonight & i want to use, i'm coming of herion but i'am so scared. The thing about n/a that scres me is the god thing. Please don't get me wrong i do belive there is more than just this but i don't think my belife is in god. I feel's like i will be kinda brain washed into a religon a don't practice. But at the same time i NEED to go i have tryed & faild sooo many time's to get clean & failed. But like you are now i think what is the pain of living like this & fighting this urge to use every f**king day god it's so hard
But people on this sight have help'd me sooo much they have even talked me round to going to N/A it's on at 7:30 tonight. A few good freind beach included have gave me hope good. let me no how you got on all the best nat xxx :)
But people on this sight have help'd me sooo much they have even talked me round to going to N/A it's on at 7:30 tonight. A few good freind beach included have gave me hope good. let me no how you got on all the best nat xxx :)
Just For Today for November 16th
"Many of us spent much of our using time alone, avoiding other people - especially people who were not using - at all costs. After years of isolation, trying to find a place for ourselves in a bustling, sometimes boisterous fellowship is not always easy. We may still feel isolated, focusing on our differences rather than our similarities. The overwhelming feelings that often arise in early recovery-feelings of fear, anger, and mistrust-can also keep us isolated. We may feel like aliens but we must remember, the alienation is ours, not NA's.
In Narcotics Anonymous, we are offered a very special opportunity for friendship. We are brought together with people who understand us like no one else can. We are encouraged to share with these people our feelings, our problems, our triumphs, and our failures. Slowly, the recognition and identification we find in NA bridge the lonely gap of alienation in our hearts. As we've heard it said - the program works, if we let it.
Just for today: The friendship of other members of the fellowship is a life-sustaining gift. I will reach out for the friendship that's offered in NA, and accept it."
This passage sums up the way I feel right now, alone and scared. I will go to the noon meeting today.
David
"Many of us spent much of our using time alone, avoiding other people - especially people who were not using - at all costs. After years of isolation, trying to find a place for ourselves in a bustling, sometimes boisterous fellowship is not always easy. We may still feel isolated, focusing on our differences rather than our similarities. The overwhelming feelings that often arise in early recovery-feelings of fear, anger, and mistrust-can also keep us isolated. We may feel like aliens but we must remember, the alienation is ours, not NA's.
In Narcotics Anonymous, we are offered a very special opportunity for friendship. We are brought together with people who understand us like no one else can. We are encouraged to share with these people our feelings, our problems, our triumphs, and our failures. Slowly, the recognition and identification we find in NA bridge the lonely gap of alienation in our hearts. As we've heard it said - the program works, if we let it.
Just for today: The friendship of other members of the fellowship is a life-sustaining gift. I will reach out for the friendship that's offered in NA, and accept it."
This passage sums up the way I feel right now, alone and scared. I will go to the noon meeting today.
David
Sounds like N/A is for you. Go to a meeting, go to a few of them. What your feeling is normal for an addict coming to the realization that they must do something. Sometimes we just don't know what or how to do it. You made the first step by coming here. Move forward and you will have a better life. Listen to beachtowel, go to a meeting.
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