I am thinking about Suboxone treatment

[Cannonfodda]

Hi all,
I am scared, really scared. I am taking 4 80mg Oxycontin, 8 30mg Oxycodone 20mg Diazepam, 12mg Zanaflex 20mg Paxil and now I just started taking 100mg Atenolol for high BP. I have been on all kinds of pain meds for 18 years. This current dose 2.5 years.

I have come down to 5 days short on my meds until my next appointment. I have been traveling with work and don't know if I lost some or it was taken from my med cabinet during a New Years party or whatever, but anyhow I don’t know what to do and I can’t do this alone.

I have looked at bupernol or something like that inpatient for 3-5 days then on Suboxtone. The cost for the treatment is $2,700. I know I should do it but I am afraid of the pain and withdrawals and just cutting down today was bad and brought me to this site right now. I had 3 knee surgeries, herniated discs and nerve issues in my back and neck, I had so many epidurals in my neck that it calcified and limited movement. I also don’t want to trade off from one addictive drug to another without the pain relief. If I knew then what I do now, I would have never taken this crap.

I have a wonderful family, great job and I am going crazy with fears of loosing one or both in the next few days.

I am not sure why I am even typing this right now, I suppose no one can understand how I feel accept you all whom I have read through some of the latest posts.
I thought of going to my Dr. and telling him my pills went missing, but I don’t know if he would believe me or not, I am feeling more and more like a drug addict.

You  don’t know me from jack and I don't do much internet posting ,Sometimes I say, I cant live like this, my children deserve better, one day a month to get my scripts taking off work to do so, when I have no pain, I just need them to feel happy. I am depressed and I don’t know what to do. Other times I say no way can I work when I cant lift my head off the pillow in the morning.

When I was put on the Oxys it was like I got my life back, no pain. I could work all day with no problems but now it has caught up with me. I guess you can’t have a pain free life without consequences.

I am sorry if I am jumping around a lot, I am not good at grammer.

Anyway, Is there someone who has similiar issues like me. I feel real stupid writing this.

[Cannonfodda]

Thanks man. I should talk to my Dr. I have never had a problem in the past 2+ years I have been going there. I will have to get my head on str8 before I make some rash decision. I will figure this out. I need to man up.

[stufuller]

Yo!

Sloooooooow down.  

You don't need to do this in one day and if you're freaking out because you're not getting enough of what you're used to, this is not a great time to make any decisions.  

If you haven't ever done it before, going to your doctor and telling him that your meds got stolen from your room while you were on a business trip, which may very well be true, shouldn't raise any red flags and it's only seeming like a big deal 'cause you're freaking out (see above).

Then, when you're calmer, take some time to talk to your wife and your doctor (and maybe someone medical who is *not* your doctor) and decide what to do.

I'm no expert, just a guy dealing with coming off a fairly low dose of methadone/hydrocodone that I got from a doctor for pain but I know that, when I decided to stop, my head wasn't on right for a few days (at least).

Look in that cabinet and see if one if the prescriptions says "Chill Pill" and, if not, pretend it did and you already took one.

You didn't rush into this condition, don't rush out when you're freaking yourself out.

You can stop if that's what you want to do, but for *today*, chill and make a plan with your wife's hopefully clear head helping you along.

S

[Cannonfodda]

2mg every 3 days? I assume it stays in your system for 72 hours then? Does it help with the pain?
thanks for the advice all, I am at a crossroads now. What do I tell my Manager that I need emergency vacation time? to go through the treatment process.
I am depressed. I am embarrased. I dont know If I want to stop taking them. I can still try to taper off. My wife wants me to choose NOW! She can hold my pills and "dispense as needed" but I have put her and soon the kids through soo much already. This will take a toll on our finances, A huge toll., I still dont know what I will do. I cant even make a decision.

[fogmussher]

I too was in such a mess that I would not be here if I had not the help of the Suboxone. I know it is different because I had been 12 years without a dream. I was going insane. I dream regularly on the Suboxone so there is something different about the effect on the subconsious thats for sure. My health , mental and physical had deteriorated, I tried for 2 years and was so out of it I didn't even realize it had been two. I thought I had been laying in that bed for one year and that was bad enough. The whole thing was killing me and I was not giong to get better. There is a time for Suboxone. I know all the bad that is said... so if all that is true and the sub stops working I will surly die. I hope to taper off it over the next few months. Already I take on;y 2 mg every three days but That is not special I guess. Now that I know more about the drug at least I'm not taking more than I need

[Mandapanda17]

I'm going to agree with the previous posters, I am actually on sub maintenance, two words that should never be used together in my opinion HOWEVER, I would not be clean if it weren't for sub. & might not be alive to chat with you. Some people choose to tell you that you aren't clean if you are on sub. I disagree with that, I AM clean, but I am also going to have to go through more pain once I am completely tapered off of it. I am on a slow taper as I have been for a couple months now, I don't think I can truly tell you whether I regret it or not until I am off completely. PLEASE don't feel stupid for posting, posting is healing and was the very first step for me. Stick around, keep reading, there is so much pro/con info about sub in these forums. Best wishes to you :)

[mr.lucky66]

Sub may help your situation for a while, but it's not a real remedy. It may put your addiction on hold for a while but you have to deal with it at some point and it's not that easy to get off either. all the best

[Cannonfodda]

So the Suboxone did help you get off the Oxy, but now the Suboxone is hard to get off of? It seems like I am in for a rollercoaster of Misery. Thanks for the reply. Good luck with the Sub detox Fog

[fogmussher]

Get some Whey Protein in you right now too! That will help a lot with the energy. scroll down to the Health pages most viewed... There is so much there to help. You will feel great on the Suboxone just realize it needs to be temporary and most people can come off it smooth if you don't stay on it very long.

[fogmussher]

No need to feel stupid. I have been right where you are and I am on Suboxone now. I couldn't get enough Oxy to feel better anymore and the cycle was rediculous. I owned a business and thought I couldn't quit then. got rid of the 9 year business and then tried to quit and still couldn't. There was never a good time to be sick for 2 weeks. and even after the 2 weeks it was not better. I was dyeing... for real. I prayed for death. I understand that the key to the Sub is to get on and off as quick as you can before your body adjusts to it. I.m working on a taper now and am so glad I found this site or I wouldn't have learned all I have. And in the nick of time as I have been on them about three mos now. I was in bed literaly for two years. The sub did save me but its time to let it go.... from all I read here, I would be making a huge mistake if I don't.