why so damn blue

[hateopiates]

why d i feel so i hate this **** and yet i feel like i want it to so bad i am all over te place 2day and i just cant get this **** out of my head i tried going for a ride and that made me wantto stop by a frieds house to get some and i came home i pick up my phone and throwit what the hll is wrong with me today 3 months ago i was happy with every 12 hour mark and i am on day 7 and hate it i do not see my pysc. until 18th wow that seems so far

[prayformetoo]

Man, I can relate to what your going thru. I'm also out of work and feeling like **** Mentally .I'm on day four and  I keep thinking that I got to find a job.But I really know that I have to get better first. I promise It will get easier .It may seem like a slow process but Do it for your family and loved ones. God Bless
Steve

[ZJILLIAN]

I am so sorry you are having such a hard time. It is really hard on a man in particular when he losses his job. We went through the same thing some years ago and it was a long battle (successful) with much personal suffering and fear.

I think it helps to break things down into manageable pieces. There is so much going on in your life it must seem overwhelming. What we did while my husband was freaking and a mess was to keep making lists.There were job issues, money issues, health issues, drug issues. Separate everything into its own category. We even made a notebook. It helped to just put stuff down on paper and get it out of his mind. Write your plans down so you can see what you are doing and what your direction is. It is a battle and needs a strategic plan.

Obviously the first and most important step is to focus on the drug addiction. Let the other problems ride; they will be there after you feel stronger. Make a good drug detox plan. Use this site ALL THE TIME. Keep posting, keep reading, and check out what you are going through with the different members here. People here have lots of experience.

Keep it very simple. stay clean for an hour. don't listen to your bad thinking. Keep posting. Let us know how you are doing. This is going to be very hard but you have people here to help who have been through this before you and can act as guides.

[SophieShine]

You will get your life back, full speed ahead, believe me. We are just all so impatient... Give some time to your body and mind to adapt and be able to function w/o meds. I know it's hard and painful but the freedom is so worth it, you are worth it.
In no way you are worthless to your family, you are getting clean, that's the best thing you can do to enjoy your family to the fullest. You are almost there, keep on fighting.
With all my support. xoxoxo. sophie.

[hateopiates]

thank u i just cant seem to get control of myself i got hurt on the ob and lost my job workmanscomp hasnt paid me in over year and half i just feel so worthless to my family i am 38 and have 2 star all over from scratch and i do not seeing that being an easy task for me i feel like all i am going to do is try and just make it threw life insted of going threw life full throtle i hte being injured it has taking the best of me i was always the light of every situation and nowi cnt seem to be a litte hppy anymore

[SophieShine]

You are on the emotional roller coaster. Try to change your mind frame, keep yourself busy, go for a run, listen to music, anything that keeps your mind off of them.
Congrats on 7 days of freedom it is a great achievement, don't throw it all away...
Hang in there real tight and keep posting, ask for all the support you can!
sophie.