I'M MAD!!!!

[discobiscuit]

Why the he11 can't I quit these damm things?  I'm down to three 10mg tabs a day and just can't seem to get any lower.  I do have undiagonsed chronic pain but cant seem to get the required mindset required to quit these things.  It seems the closer I get to quitting the worse my pain gets.  The pain I have is close to arthritis but doctors assure me I am not close to anything like that.

I'm sitting here hurting and want a pill so bad but know that it will only last a few hours and the vicious cycle begins again.  I'm so mad at the world right now I can't see straight.  I've prayed, begged, pleaded and screamed but nothing seems to work in resloving my pain and addiction.  While I have NEVER called my pain doctor for an early refill I know I am addicted.  

WHAT DO I DO?  I've tried for the past two years to quit and just can't seem to do it.  I've almost convinced myself this is my fate in life and I have to learn to deal with it.  It seems I'm on my own as it feels God is not listening and he is willing to let me flounder around with this.  I HATE IT!

Any help out there?  I'm not feeling real thankful right now.

[worried878]

agree..and also a chronic painer for 24 yrs...in reality we reach a point where we r fooling ourselves that the pills are helping our pain..an addicts tolerence get so so high there is no dose high enuf after yrs of using to actually relieve pain anymore..we take them to function..and some r ok with this..and some r not..sounds like u r NOT ok with this

narcotics do not directly relieve pain like ice, heat, anti-inflammatories etc..they only interrupt the signal to the brain so we THINK we dont feel pain...often I think I just didnt CARE that I had pain when i was on pills..but it was there..I reached for pills whether I hurt or not..and I become depressed from using..no euphoria..only guilt, frustration and isolation...when its time to let go, u feel it in ur soul

but u gotta want it bad enuf to make a plan and let go..u r in control..dont ever forget that

keep posting

[kim715]

I'm with Lesa about getting pissed at your addiction....and as for saying you 'can't' quit,thats just not true...you CAN.It is absolutely within your power to stop.You could get up right now and flush the remaining pills,you have the power to do that physically.You're fighting that mental battle though.Your addictive brain is making the pain seem worse,trying to get you to feed it.Even when you said you had never called for an early refill,and that you have nearly convinced yourself that this is your fate in life,thats your addiction trying to justify you continuing to use.We've all been there.That mental battle and the fear of w/ds is what holds most of us down the longest.You have to project that anger you are feeling in the right direction.Like Lesa said get pissed at the pills and how they have taken control.Use that anger to fuel the fight in taking control of your life back.You do have the power.You CAN do this.Keep posting...Goodluck...Kim

[10356]

Instead of being pissed at the world get pissed at your addiction.. put all that helpless energy into a war on withdrawing and get it over with.. I live with chronic pain and have been a drug addict for 41 years now.. The brain plays a game with you.. it ups the pain to get you to take more. You have the Power inside of you to overcome this.. Only you.. Quit.. I have found Motrin actually works acupuncture I'm still trying anything but the drugs.. I have found the pain I suffer has lessened the longer away from opiates.. they consume your thoughts and life.. fight to get back what is rightfully yours.. Your Life and Freedom.. be Kind to Yourself.. lesa

[gizzy32]

First of all, God does listen, but gives us free will to make our own choices. You have to decide which is worse, the pain or using the pills.  Your right, it's so tough and frustrating at first, even seems hopeless for a lil while, but it's not, there is always hope. I don't suffer from chronic pain so my advice might not be right, but i am sorry your going through this.

How many were you taking before this and how long did ya taper? My mom has arthritis now and takes non narcotic pills and says they work for her. I don't know your situation, it's just a thought. Sometimes, some people will taper down to a couple pills, then make the jump from there because it can be torture when they get so low, so they get it over with. You will get some more feeback soon, just wanted to wish you luck.

[febninthgirl]

Hey hang in there. Where are you hurting. I know that my pain worse when I was on the pills. I still needed them for pain. The pain I feel was more for my brain calling for them. Hang in there if you want to stop we all are here for you