Long term opiate user

[geneva1999]

I have been on some kind of opiate for nearly 18 years!First was the hydrocodone addiction then 9 yrs of MMT and the I detoxed off of methadone cold turkey,I used a benzo and benadryl vitamins and stress relievers and I still thought it was going to kill me the diareaha was so intense I went from 130 lbs to 98 lbs in a very short period(like within a month) the depression and just feeling like a failure as a woman,a wife,and a mother witch was a big part in the start of my addiction to begin with! Its nice to be wonder woman 24/7!!!Anyway now im on suboxzone because the transition from having a buffer for all those years to just being sober was to much to bear,however the suboxzone is helping but the mood swings the aggitation has just turned me into a bicth from hell at least my husband thinks so! It seems I have little to no sex drive at all and my plan was to start to tapper around the 12 mo.mark and its about that time and I am scared that I dont know how to live sober anymore! What do I do? What is the next step?

[leeisgettingclean]

all you can do is start your taper so that you can get off the sub, as for livin with the reality of no drugs...you might wanna see if your doctor can give you some SSRIs for depression, if infact you suffer from depression and if not you just have to accept life as it is,thats part of all this

[kim715]

The next step is you start your taper off the sub and you get yourself some type of aftercare in place...It takes time to learn how to live life sober again.We're all so used to just popping something anytime life just gets a little tough that we have no clue how to cope without doing that.We all need to learn new coping skills because lets face it,life isn't always a bed of roses.You're not alone my friend,we all had the same fear.I know I did....I have over a year clean now,and it hasn't been the easiest year,but now instead of reaching for a pill bottle,I cry when I'm sad,and I yell when I'm mad,but the best thing about it is that now I actually feel something.I'm no longer numb and I smile again and now when I'm happy,I'm truly happy in ever sense of the word.You can do this....

Lee offered some good advice about seeking some help from your doctor also.

All the best to you...Kim

[10356]

Kim hit the nail on the head. counseling meetings and speaking with your Dr. as lee wrote will be beneficial in the process of the tapering and learning to live life drug free.. I wish you well on your journey. lesa