Methadone withdrawal

[Jenr32star]

Just looking for support with my methadone withdrawal.

[Jenr32star]

Hearing how positive you are and how good you seem to feel gives me a little hope.  I know it will eventually pass but I want it gone already!  I can manage the emotions half decently. Bu can also manage with broken up sleep...I went through that with all my pregnancies too so I'm not a stranger to it.  Lol. Bits mostly just the physical stuff and the difficulty in javjng with functioning that's presenting the most problems.  I find it incredibly hard to go to work not to mention being productive.  I also find it difficult to care for my kids and all of my home duties.  That makes me feel  like a bad mother and a bad fiancé, a bad woman all around.  And that directly effects my self esteem which also in turn effects my mood and out look on things.  I try to tell myself it's not my fault and I'll get through it.  My fiancé is being stretched thin.  He's a wonderful man and doesn't complain but I can see its wearing on him which upsets me and makes me feel shame, guilt, embarrassment, and a lot of other uncomfortable feelings.  I don't know...I wanna try and get some sleep though.  Have a good night.  Thanks for the prayers and support from you and everyone else also.  

[gnarly_1]

Hi Jen  hey it has been a wile you still with us     please post to let us know how your doing
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Gnarly<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

[gnarly_1]

hey jen.....sorry it tok me so long to get back to you  but I have been really realy sick with the flu....anyways so your at a 5....that is to be expected but at least your making progress  as for the tummy ishues try some yogurt with pro/biotiics and eat a couple a day this will really help the leg aches are also normal  this drug just dont like to let go of you .....just keep your eyes on the prize and you will overcome this with time.....you and your husband should take time to pray over this when a husband and wife pray together it is powerful  ...me and Kat do all the time and it has been life changing....anyway keep us up to date you will recover I promise
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Gnarly<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

[Jenr32star]

I'm glad your feeling better!  That's one Hong we have never done together is pray out loud aside from at meals and of course with everyone else at church.  I like that.  I'm still getting better slowly.  My eating habits got all messed up on our cruise so my big thing now is to work on getting back to my healthy eating because I am also definitely a food/sugar addict and for me it's all or nothing.  And that directly impacts how I feel physically and emotionally.  Anyway thanks for always checking.  It feels good to know people care.  I tried posting a new thread the other day but it never showed up.  It was kinda long so I got real frustrated and didn't sign on for a little.

[gnarly_1]

hi Jen ....welcome back home....im so happy for you congrats on getting married and it sounds like everything went off well......I have been trying to get my wife on a cruse forever but she has a phobia about drowning so no luck there....you couldent have picked a better honeymoon.....those ships are very relaxing ...all our friends have been on them ....where the odd couple out....anyways im so glad you where able to enjoy yourself in spite of the methadone withdrawal your progress is doing very good....im also happy to hear your a Christian with the power of God and threw prayer  those that believe do a lot better then those that dont I will content to pray for your recovery....thanks for posting to keep us up to date  on a scale of 1 to 10   10 being energy level back to where it is suppose to be where do you stand???...and what if anything as far as withdrawal symptoms are you still feeling???  let us know keep posting for support
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Gnarly<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

[Jenr32star]

As for energy level...maybe 5.  My energy level is pretty horrible most days but some are pretty good.  Withdrawal...some days my legs still ache for no reason.  Other than that I'm good.  I sneeze a lot, my eyes are sensitive to light and my digestive system still seems out of wack.  However I'm wondering if some of things are normal...the light sensitivity Miya be normal and the sneezing.  The GI stuff may be me regular who knows.  Lol.  I started heroin at age 13 and got on suboxone at age 19 then methadone at age 23 and I'm 31 now.  Although It's not as long as ally of people have used its a long time considering my age.  I have never been totally opiate free since age 13 until now so it's hard to say what's normal life without drugs.  I believe he leg aches are still withdrawal but I'm not sure about he other things I mentioned.  Also...my face has become very oily compared to before.  My complexion itself isn't too bad but my face feels gross and greasy by maybe 1-2pm   Is hat normal?  I always had a nice complexion even when using and my face has never been oily like this before.  It's kinda embarrassing at my age.

[Jenr32star]

Thanks for the congratulations, well wishes and prayers.  Maybe you can go on a cruise with some of your friends who go?  It's definitely something you should try, it's amazing!

[Soulscapex]

Hey Jen , glad to see your back, congrats btw, the stomach thing takes awhile i kept asking the same thing, i even asked my doctor a few times, but all is returning to normal , that was the longest symptom i had. it started to get better around the 90 day mark, sneezing was bad for me , but to be honest i dont remember when that stopped it just did , and i never paid any mind to the fact that it went away.
my energy started to come around about day 40 or 50 i do recall, i do alot of physical work, so i had to just force myself and roll with it, but it in all i ended up starting to work out as soon as i could and to this day i think like 109 or something im still at the gym going at it.  around the 50 day mark i did get muscle twitches in my knee , it would go on for hours but i just realized that no longer happens, i guess its all part of healing . Just keep doing what you have been , and it will all go away.  I started to think i had something wrong with my stomach, only bad thing that came out of my detox , well i guess its a good thing is i found out i have high blood pressure.
i refuse to take the meds tho, i have this fear of pills now its weird. ive been working with my therapist about this.
well have a blessed day .

[corey4433]

Gnarly she is on her cruise till the 14th was just reading the posts

[gnarly_1]

Hey Jen  how goes it...we havent heard from you in a wile please post when you get the time...........Gnarly..............

[Jenr32star]

Well I'm home and life is good.  Our honeymoon was great but I can say that the lack of energy and exhaustion did take a toll on it.  It still wasn't bad and he wasn't upset but I felt bad because I wanted to do more and experience more than we did but I just couldn't.  We got to sit on the beach in the Bahamas and see some amazing comedy shows, have some amazing meals and watch some other shows.  Most of all we got to relax a lot and just be happy in one another's company and enjoy time alone without our 5 kids surrounding us.  We did miss them all terribly by mid cruise but we also enjoyed the break!  Our wedding was amazing.  Everyone enjoyed themselves.  The pastor was 15 minutes late for the wedding and gave us quite a scare.  Lol. He got lost.  Yes gnarly I do believe in God.  We are very involved in a conservative Christian church.  I look up to you and your wife for making it through all the storms and having your marriage survive so long.  I admire that.  Anyway, time for bed so I can make it back to work tomorrow morning...in 9 hours.  Yuck!  

[Soulscapex]

Congrats on the wedding Jen, 6 weeks so happy for you. Wish you the best on your trip. If you get a chance update us.
God Bless

[gnarly_1]

Hi Jen...well a big congrats on getting married and what a great gift your giving your new husband....a clean you!!!!  me and Kat have been together for 36yrs and married for 33yrs so where lifers  if I had to do it all over I would pic her again we have shared a good life together we raised 5 children and now have 4 grandchildren even threw the tuff stuff we weatherd the storm... try not to get to overwhelmed with all this  your emotions are still fragile at this point in recovery so try not to have to many expectation's  just let go of all the little stuff and enjoy a day that you wont forget....I dont know if you believe in God or not but if you put him first  learn how to forgive...never go to bed angree with each other  you will prosper  if you get a chance go to my home page and read my journal  ''where is god in all this''...try to just relax and enjoy your cruse  most of them offer massage's it would be great for you and your husband to share one and there worth every penny....im so happy to here your sleeping threw the night  it took me 2 months to get anything close to a good nights sleep so your a head of the game  my wife and I will say a special prayer for you.....that you will prosper and that God bless you abundantly.....  let us know how things turn out when you get back your friend Mark..............

[Jenr32star]

Thanks!  I sure will get back with everyone next Sunday 8/14 at the latest unless I discover that I have phone service on board.  I'm feeling okay.  It was a rough couple days cause I've had a lot on my plate but emotionally I'm feeling good just hurting physically.  On the bright side today is 6 weeks!!  Yay!!!

[Jenr32star]

I'm sorry I've been so wrapped up with getting stuff together for our wedding.  Tomorrow is our big day...22 hours to be exact!  I'm doing okay but yesterday and today took a lot out of me with setting up the travels and chairs and decorating.  I hurt.  I had been feeling pretty good before that though.  I'm sleeping great.  I had 2 nights now where I didn't wake up at all!!  I'm at 6 weeks today!!!  My complexion has changed for the worse.  I've never had a greasy face/complexion but I do now and u can't stand it.  Did anyone else have that issue?  We leave for a cruise tomorrow and won't be back till next Sunday so I don't anticipate posting because I don't believe I'll have service.  Thanks for all the support!

[VICourageous]

HELLO.....Jen, how are you feeling??

Congrats on your time and your wedding. This is all great news.

I never had Headaches like I did coming off my 3 pills, but I was told that the brain has billions of wiring and this all had to adjust back. The body aches come from this too, as my Dr called it Somatic Syndrome, which is your brain sending false singles to your body. Also, we have that rebound pain for awhile, while your Endorphins are clearing out. Hang in...YOU will get past this.

Have a wonderful time on your Vacation too. Come back and give us a Update!!!!
God be with...

[gnarly_1]

Hey Jen where are you???? please post to let us know how your doing............gnarly

[gnarly_1]

Hi Jen....well the pain your feeling is from the methadone that leaches into your bones over time   it slowly comes out as time goes by....just know there will be a end to it your doing really good for a little over 30 days clean your 1/3 of the way there if it goes the whole 90 days like it did for me  just hang in there and post to let us know how your doing
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Gnarly>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

[Jenr32star]

Also while I'm thinking of it...my wedding is 1.5 weeks away on 8/6...next Saturday.  Sooo....I'm going on my honeymoon which is a cruise to the Bahamas from 8/7 to 8/14 (late) and i won't be online at all so don't get worried if I don't post.  I will update everyone once I'm back though.  I'll try to remind all of you next Friday.  I will definitely be okay and clean so no worries there!

[Jenr32star]

You know i never had pain issues or any accidents that should cause pain...never even broken a bone!  Lol.  But some days I wonder if this is what my life will be...pain forever.  I keep trying to tell myself it's just the withdrawals but some days it makes me wonder.  I'm only 31 so it darn sure better not be old age yet.  Lol.  But I'm run down a lot and get tired easy and have minor aches and pains that won't go away.  They are tolerable but annoying and just make me question if this is my existence now that I'm off methadone. I know better but the thoughts still get in my mind from time to time....

[Jenr32star]

I'm doing okay.  I have 31 days today!!'  Yay!!!  Feeling better by the day now (for the most part).  Emotionally good, great really.  I have to worst headache I've ever had in my life today which s u c k s but such is life.  My complexion is bad now and I sweat and get chills but I'm alright.  I stopped taking my clonidine and I'm sleeping well.  I only wake up 2-3x a night and it takes maybe 30 minutes to fall back asleep but overall not too horrible.

[gnarly_1]

Hi Jen  just got home from a looooooong monday but wanted to see how your doing.....you mentioned the headaches.....God I thought I had a brain tumor they where so bad....it is just one more thing....this is the drug that just keeps on giving....it s u c k s but like all of your symptoms it will pass   try a cool washcloth over your eyes in a dark room  the otc pain relevers may help  excedrin worked the  best for me....this stuff is really dragging you threw the ringer  but I promise sooner or later it will let up....we just dont know when.....it your at 1/2 your capacity your doing better then I was...I wish I had a magic wand I could make it go away with but you just have to go threw it.....both vicky and I had a ruff detox so we both know what it is like  just take time for yourself  like a nice hot soak after work.....treat yourself to a message it does wonders for both the mind and sprite....I know it may not seam like it but your beating this thing  and even a bad day puts you one day closer to getting well...just know where here for you...my heart goes out to you and I pray for you daily keep positng for support and when you find the time post to let us know how your doing
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Gnarly<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

[gnarly_1]

Hi Jen.....well your doing it 1 day at a time....your scheduled at work sounds like mine....we put over 400 new companys on and it is up to me a 3 guys to make there websites blend with ours and as always it needs to be done yesterday....it is hard to come home after a 10 hour grind on a computer and still make time for this  but some how I manage.....just know what your going threw is a very typical withdrawal from this drug....it is not so much the severity of the withdrawal but the length of time it takes to recovery  every day you dont use is a victory and just know your on the right path  with time you will get better.....defiantly get the epsom salt for the bath it will really help with the body aches just a cup ful to a nice hot soak it will also give you magnesum that is a great sleep aid....try not  to get discouraged a positive attitude is your best friend going threw this   I remeber all to well just how lousy and tired and achey I felt for months but today it is a distant memory  every time I get another year clean I take my coin to the clinic and show the staff that with some will power and perseverance you can over come methadone  as for work  just pace yourself  keep posting for support
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Gnarly<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

[Jenr32star]

Thanks for your continued support.  I appreciate your ability to make time to come on medhelp and do what you do despite your hectic work schedule, time for yourself and your family.  I agree so much it's not the severity but more hr length.  I can function just only at about half my capacity.  It just stinks that it won't seek to end.  Anyway, as always thanks and have a good day!!

[VICourageous]

Calling Jen..Hello!!!

How are you doing???

[Jenr32star]

I'm doing...sleep gradually improves day by day but the discomfort during the day doesn't seem to improve.  And I have no injuries or reason for the discomfort.  Horrible heada he today.  No desires to use whatsoever but I'm losing steam.  I don't view mean as far as recovery I just mean as far as life goes in general.  It's getting worse by the day and I believe it's due to work related stuff.  We are very very very short handed and they depend on me for everything and are mandating me to overtime at my job.  I'm seriously considering walking out but I have a very good government job so I don't wanna. I'm sure the withdrawal makes matters worse and causes me to be a bit hypersensitive.  But I feel like my job is taking everything from me and j have nothing left for me or my family after work which is horrible.

[Soulscapex]

How you doin Jen , keep truckin along your makin it moment by moment.

[Jenr32star]

Thanks!  You too!  How have you been doing?  I'm the same.  Sleep is improving but days are the same which is not very good.  Still no cravings or thoughts of using just lots of physical discomfort. No have a vicious headache today.  How are you feeling?

[gnarly_1]

Hi Jen.....well as you can see this drug is very cyclic and your traped in a cycle now.....just know you will cycle out of it just like you cycled into it it can last a hour 5 hours or even a day.....I wish there was a way to get around this but there is not....you just have to go threw it to get to the other side....I t will get better I promise you....even when it dont feel like it every day your not using is a victory...how are you sleeping??? no sleep or broken sleep makes it harder  try a nice hot soak in epsom salt 1/2 hour b/4 bed...you sound like your eating right that helps to....just know your doing everything you can to get well you should start having more good days then bad your sorta got to ''fake it until you make it'' until then    keep posting for support where here for you
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Gnarly<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

[Jenr32star]

Thanks.  I take hot baths but haven't been using Epsom salt.  I'll have to go get some tomorrow.  Sleep is ehhh.  Pretty broken but I can feel the sleep improving for the most part.  Every once in a while I have a super bad night. It reminds me of how broken my sleep was while I was pregnant. Lol.  I do take melatonin ever night so I'm not sure if it's helping but I do it anyway.  Today was my first day of a 10 day stretch at work which I'm dreading but I'll make it through one way or another.

[VICourageous]

Hi Again Jen,
Just stopped bye to see how you are. I had some friends come up here from L.V. Had to get that energy up for about 3 days and then after they left I crashed for a day..LOL

Did you stop the Clonidine? Do not take it in the morning for it will make you feel down and out. Where is your pain at? It could be some re-bound pain for sure. I found that sugar was not good at first at all. As far as the mental part that we talked about taking awhile, that is nothing compared to the physical. It is just the after-fact of learning how to deal with life and not running to something every time you stub your toe. That is the part that is Post acute w/ds=PAWS. This is the emotional and physiological part. Lots of ppl on here do not even believe in this part, so it happens to some and I guess not to others. It all depends on how long we have used and the age we are when we come clean.

I am so sorry to hear that you are having such a hard time. Just seems that some bounce back way quicker then others. I know the Energy thing did take me a long time. However, you are very busy so you could just be wearing yourself down before you have really healed. I was lucky and had no one at home but my Hub and gave notice at work when I came clean. Now it is a whole different ballgame since my Heart issue.

One day Jen, One day you will wake up and this will all be behind you. I have to be very careful of what I do take at night, for it will highly affect me in the morning. Could not take any type of sleep-aid but those vit/min.
Keep pushing..I know it is getting very frustrating, but YOU have come to far now!!!
Bless U
Vickie

[Jenr32star]

I'm  not feeling very good today again.  This stinks so bad!  I woke up alright.  Was good at church aside from yawning 50x in an hour.  Today has been a roller coaster.  I have hours where I felt okay and then hours where I hurt and really feel it.  I've been feeling bad for the last 5 hours now.  I'm feeling exhaunted to top it all off.

[gnarly_1]

Hi jEN.....well try not to read any thing into your recovery it is different for every body.....I have helped a lot of people off this drug and some come around a lot faster then others  Me and Vic cam off some heavy habits  it was a worst case senero for us  look at soulscapex he is doing really good and is coming around fast....faster then most...just know this is a race one by the tortus not the hare...we win this war in baby steps you will notice improvements every week that gets behind you  it took a good 90 days for me to come around and each month after that I saw improvements  you dont undo 35yrs of abuse over night  just know this.....every thing you go threw is so so worth it and in the big sceem of things it is only a short time in your life so put it into perspective  as always keep posting for support where here for you
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Gnarly<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

[Jenr32star]

Well today was pretty good too!  I slept till 830 am and went to bed at 11pm last night!  I woke up at least 5 times but was able to go back to sleep every time.  Usually by 6 am there is no going back to bed.  I also skipped my AM dose of clonidine today and might also skip my bed time dose to see how I do.  I'm not feeling "normal" yet...whatever that is, I haven't known normal since the age of 12 but I don't think this is how in supposed to feel which is to be expected I guess.  I don't know if that 3 vitamin combo you talk about is what made the difference or if it's just a fluke that I'm feeling better the last few days I've been taking it.  Regardless of the reason I'll take it!  We shall see what tomorrow brings.

[Jenr32star]

Well today in feeling a bit better however I'm not too convinced it's here to stay.  I'm eating yellow carrots and white beans for dinner with a rather large piece of salmon and a bottle of Gatorade which I used to chase down the calcium, magnesium, zinc mix along with some Advil. Lol.  Protein for breakfast and a lot of not so good stuff for lunch.  We had a picnic at work.  Lol.  I still have not ventured to buy sleepy time tea because I HATE tea. Lol.  Hot tea cold tea, green tea black tea.  Sweet tea regular tea...I hate it all.  If the sleep gets bad enough I will try it.  I went to an AA meeting today.  I stayed quiet but it was nice.  

[Soulscapex]

Happy you had a better day , are you also taking a multi- vitamin , i also took B-12 to help with energy , The running a marathon thing will come and go , the sun just killed me today , feels like i ran 2 5ks, The tea really helps calm you down at night,  I also took valerian root at night with melatonin , those are probly the wrong spellings, but they helped alot , Congrats on making a meeting.  Sounds like your on the correct path. Keep putting one foot in front of the other and soon you will have this in the bag.

God Speed

[Jenr32star]

Thank you!  I'm sorry to hear that your day was so draining.  That's a horrible feeling isn't it?!  I also do have multivitamins...ill  heck to see if it has b12 in it and if not I'll get some.  Thanks a bunch for the tip!  I was able to do more at home this evening compared to usual.  It felt good, tiring but good.  Lol.   It sounds like your going well also and headed in the right direction!!!