My husband is withdrawing from oxycotin how do I keep him calm I feel so helpless

[rachel88661]

My husband just recently admitted to me that he has had an addiciton to oxycotin for the past few months.  I knew he was doing them here and there but never thought it would get to this point.   Then the lying came and finding ways to get money so he could hide it from me.  He has withdrawn before but this time it is bad.  I know he wants help and is qutting cold turkey with some help with a med from his doc.  I think it is called colodin??  SOme sort of blood pressure med that helps with withdrawal symptoms.  His legs are so restless, he is up and down and cant stop pacing.  I am trying so hard to stay calm and supportive but I know that when he tries to go to bed tonight he is going to go crazy what can I do??

[ImGettingClean]

can he come on here?

get him in a hot bath if he cant...it'll help relax him...how many was he taking and for how long?

[TrayCee]

HOTHOTHOT baths!  I stayed in the (jetted) tub for hours at a time

[rachel88661]

as far as I know he was taking 3-4 a day i am not sure how any mg they were he took he last one yestserday at noon....

[rachel88661]

i iwll try to get him on here i keep telling him he needs to talk to people that know what he is feeling

[Rupp86]

hot baths/showers work wonders.  Check out the Thomas Recipe on here.  Personally i came off a 4 yr oxy addiction cold turkey.  One of the hardest things ive ever had to do and i had to do it by myself. No support group.  It is possible.  The not being able to sleep and restless legs and bein in the bathroom constantly and soreness......its all part of the game i decided to play.  Its only really 3-4 days of hell.  And i say ONLY but looking back on it now its a small price to pay to be happy.....sober.  Its gonna seem like you are helpless but you being there for him every step of the way is super important.  I wish i had someone by my side when i was quitting.  Hes gonna be real irritable dont take it personally.  Everyone here is a great help....they were to me.  Listen to them. :) Best of luck

[rachel88661]

I cant believe in just a few short minutes the support that I alreay feel .  I am so scared and nervous and everything else because I dont know what he is feeling.  I know he wants to get better and I keep reminding him that it will get better just to stay strong.  I told him he already made it 1 day!!  That is huge because he is one day closer to being sober.

[ImGettingClean]

U're doing great Rachel and he is SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO lucky to have u...just be there for him, it'll mean the world...there r times he may need u, and there r times he may need his space. If he gets irritable or cranky the next few days, please remember it's the withdrawals...he'll be ok...

get him in a hot bath and just have him relax. we're all here for u both.

[ImGettingClean]

remind him of how proud u r of him for quiting and tell him u love him (it helps when my wife does the same to me)....n e thing positive during this experience goes a long way....

[rachel88661]

do you think that trying to find suboxone would be beneficial or just stick it out.  I said try to stick it out.  We went to a local substance abuse hospital today but they have a 4 day wait list and we thought we could get some outpatient therapy easily but that wasnt the case.  They recommened him go to his primary care dr and ask for some colodin, blood pressure med that helps with symptoms.  He is to take 1 every 4 hours until they r gone.  He seems to be resting comfortably rihgt now on the couch I am in the other room trying to not keep talking and asking him how he is feeling  

[ImGettingClean]

i WOULD STAY AWAY from Sub, but others have their opinions. Switching to subs, you're opening another can of worms. I would stick with the Conodine and just tough it out...by day 4-5, he'll be feeling much better. I'm on day 3 and although not feeling my best, i'm still able to function...

let him rest...no need to wake him every few min's...u seem so loving. he'll really need u through the next few days...

keep us posted!

Nick

[Rupp86]

youre good......personally i think suboxone just draws it out cuz while he will feel good when he takes it its still an opiate......you just cant get high off of it and if you take it long enough just like anything he will become addicted to that. Suboxones w/d's are just as bad as oxys in my opinion ive been through both but suboxone lasts a looooooot longer and is much harder to totally quit.  Theyre called 'maintnance' programs for a reason.  Its for people to maintain.  Im not talkin smack about it cuz for a lot of people it saved thier lives but this is just my personal opinion.  I was doin 210 mg of oxy avg everyday for 4 years......c/t was the best way to go for me!  Keep in mind everyday will be better than the last.  And if you can get to day 4 theres no turnin back.  Just be suportive for him and like it was already said if hes irritable its the w/d's dont take it personal.  Hes gonna have time where he needs you and times where he just wants to be alone. Just be there for him when he needs you

[Jules1866]

Hey Rachel,

Your husband is lucky to have you!

I think that if his family dr said he could take the colodin and as long as it is not a narcotic of any kind he can take it.......

also, just you being there, hot baths and this may sound corny but let him watch whatever tv program during the nites he cannot sleep and rub his legs down, this will help the aches and pains tremendously....lots of fluids.....and tlc which it sounds like he has already.

I think you will get great care and advice in this forum....everyone has something to give.

Hang in there and you rock! Jules

[rachel88661]

Ya it is not a narcotic and the dr. called the substance abuse hospital we were at this am, they were the ones that recommened it.  I know today is only day 1 and it is going get worse before it gets better I am just praying he stays strong.  I know he wants to stop so it is going to be a long few sleepless days but it will be worth it in the end!  Thank you all so much for your support....

rachel

[rachel88661]

I also just learned of alanon meetings, are they helpful??

[Jules1866]

yes, very helpful.....

maybe you should search to house and make sure there is nothing for him to get his hands on to take.

also, if you cant get him on this site, you find the best ones and begin to read them aloud to him, you need to realize that he has already done the hardest part, he made the decision to stop!! he went to a hospital to detox, omg that is huge!!!!!!!!

read to him!!!!

jules

[mpace6983]

I dont know if it will help with your husbands leg pain,cramps ect, I'm on a med called Requip. It's actually for restless leg syndrome. I dont know if it would help,but it's worth a shot to run it by your doc.

[rachel88661]

Ya his restless leg is def what keeps him from sleeping.  Although he knows it comes with the withdrawals I cant stand to see him like this.  Just trying to stay positive and reminding him what life will be like once he is clean!!  Rough day but like I said it is day 1 so keep praying for us!!

[chopper841]

The blood pressure med should help him sleep I'm on day 24 and still have the restless legs I will tell you everything that helps me. Hot baths, Hot Tub if possible, swimming I hated it the first few days but after it really helped with pain and gave me a few hours of relief.  Melatonin and valarian root would help me sleep with the leg pain, Epson Salt baths helped for a few days. You can get everything at Walgreens.  I also took a multivitamen I think one a day, fish oil, potassium, I think what's really important is feeding him he won't want to eat get him gatoraide, oarnge juice, I drank allot and ate fresh tomato's.  It can be done Rachel he needs hope give it to him, run a bath for him every once in awhile if he wont eat get protein shakes for the first few days.  The quicker he gets exercise the better he will feel. I have walked everyday for at least 30 minutes today I walked for 1 hour.  

[Some_life1976]

hey your going to a rough few days keep posting everyone here has gone through it and are wonderful people i had a nasty norco habit would take 6 10mg at lesat five times a day for three years i am on day four and starting to feel better still not sleeping great but i know the worst is over hang in there keep posting your a wonderful wife hes lucky to have you

[rachel88661]

So we made it through night 1.  It was horrible.  He would take a hot bath for a half hour sleep for a half hour then pace for a half hour, all night long.  We went to the store and got him valerian root yesterday so he has been taking it regulary.  It was so terrible to see him in such despair but like i told him after today you will be 2 days clean!! Thanks for the support I will keep posting.    

[abel04]

HI rachel & hubby.  I went through this in March, so you can read my posts, but it will be 3-4 more days.... I counted hours.......24 down, only 72 hours to go.the 71 then 70 ....then 24, then done! REALLY!.I got some ativan from doctor on day 2, it really helped with the shakes........i walked most nights back & forth in the livingroom.  Also really helped to take immodium for abdominal cramping (which is really bad)--just take it while stools loose. lots of warm tea, magnesium/calcium supplement, fresh fruit, steam veggies & prt in blender with a little broth milk or water to make easy to eat soup. i was sick sick sick....no way i could have worked, though some folks are able to.  
YOU CAN DO IT and if you fail you can still do it, right?
annabel in texas

[rachel88661]

Thanks Annabel!  Ya we just got back from the dr and he gave him something to hopefully help him sleep.  If he could sleep more than a half hour at a time and eliminate some of the restless legs he would be in better shape but I told him every minute that oasses he is closer to recovery.  I feel so bad becuase he is so upset and just keeps apologizing for what he did to us.  One day I will have the real him back and I am very excited about it!!

Rachel

[ImGettingClean]

God Bless your heart Rachel. I've broken down to my wife and apologized to her so many times for what i did to "us" also...ure a GOOD woman...

Just be there for him and take it 1 step @ a time...hope he feels better

Nick

[SensibleInSarnia]

What did your doc give him to sleep?

[jt808]

i was on 60 pills aa day for over 8 yrs the rls KILLED me but try hylands rls u can get it over the counter at like walgreens and u take like 2-3 as needed trust me itll make em feel just a lil bit beter plz try it if u want cuz the rls for me was soooooo bad. good luck.

[Weney3777]

My husband and I went through oxy w/d together a couple of months ago. We constantly messaged eachother's legs. Even arms and neck. it really helped.

[Jules1866]

Rachel,

You are wise getting the valerin root, i drink it in my tea, there are many things you can get from the health food store (all natural) to help with anxiety and depression for after the withdrawls are over, be prepared so it does not sneak up on him...valerian root, passion flower, kava kava, and keep rubbin him down, the worst part is the rls and the aches and pains.

he is half way there!!!!! i am prayin for you and hubby! what is hubby first name so I can pray for him....

jules

[Rupp86]

hows day 2?

[rachel88661]

Well we made it it is now day 3.  He slept better lastnight the dr gave him a light sleep aid.  He was up and down a few times but better than the night before.   I am hoping by the weekend he will be feeling better so he can venture out and get some air.  We have taken a few short walks together but it is pretty chilly here today so not sure what we will be able to do.  He seeems to be a little more sad today.  Upset about what he did to himself me and his family.  It is killer seeing him cry but I am trying to stay strong.  Thank you for all your support,

Rachel and Hubby Cory

[ginsa]

Hi Rachel,

Don't be alarmed by seeing your hubby cry. It's a normal symptom of withdrawl. The first day in detox I had tears streaming out of me. It's a neurological reaction to changes in nerve-cell communication. And it feels good to just let it out. Encourage him to go ahead and cry!

[Some_life1976]

crying is good! I cyied for two days once i started i couldnt stop it but boy did it make me feel better! your a wonderful wife he will be fine with your help!

[jt808]

hey i was curious how his rls was doing, and if u had a chance to get the hylands rls at walgreens it worked wonders for me? good luck and stay strong.

[rachel88661]

So here it is..... He couldn't do it on his own and is now at a detox center in Plymouth Massachusetts for 6 days.  It was the hardest thing I have ever had to do but I found out he had eaten a couple percs the previous day, granted it wasnt an oc but still, I had a breakdown and we realized he couldn't do it with just me.  I contacted our familes and with their support he was brought to the facility last night.  I miss him tremendoulsy and it is going to be the hardest 6 days of my life.  I pray every waking momnet that he sticks it out and gets the porfessional help he needs.  He told me as I was leaving that he wanted to see me happy again while he was balling his eyes out, he is sooo scared.  I am soo scared I just cant wait for this to all be over.  Pray for us..

Rachel and Cory

[NautyOne]

Wow~~~Rachael, he is in a good place.  Not everyone can do it on there own.  Sometimes it's just harder to do things like this in our own environment.  Sometimes things work better when we are plucked out of our surroundings.  He will be fine as long as he stays there and detox's.  

We have to be careful, Rachael.  We try to be nice and loving and caring, but many times that ends up putting us in the enabler position.  You can be a loving wife and a swift kick in the butt.  Not saying that's what he needs right now, but this is now something you will be battling forever.  Once u have been bitten by the addiction bug, the venom never leaves the veins.  It's a sneaky, lying, cheating, hiding, mess of a "disease"  I admire you support and compassion for you husband, but when he comes out of detox....Love him...don't passify or enable him.  You can love him with an iron fist.......if that makes sense.  When an addict smells enabler, especially to a life partner.  It can be a disaster......

I wish you well, hun
luv,
nauty............

[Jules1866]

Wow, that is great!!!!! You are really lucky because he is really in this to beat it!!!

Hang in there and I will pray!!! jules