One Last Time~

[dominosarah]

Wednesday nite i lost a friend/customer to a heroin overdose, he was 39.  His name was Brandon.  When i first met him he kept his head down and didnt say anything except thank you.  Over time we started talking and soon he came in, head held high and always said "goodmorning" at 11:00 p.m.  We talked of simple things and we talked of our addiction.  We always said we had to keep our Guard Up as that gnome sits in the back of our head swinging, just ready to pounce.  He thanked me for always treating him like he mattered as others in this town look down on addicts.  He lived a hard life and was working so hard at making a better life for himself and his daughter.  I know his relationship fell apart and i am not sure of all the details of Wednesday, all i know is when i was coming home i saw the ambulance at his place.  He passed away in the middle of the night.  One more time was his one last time~You will be missed my friend~

[conhall]

I was very sad to see this post,
I am truly sorry Sara.
I Lost a Close friend in my group also and Its so hard, I was so heartbroken and still am, I Miss her everyday every minute, but the thing that always sticks in my mind is something you have said so many times "Keep your Guard up"
Addiction doesnt go away it doesnt matter how much time you have a year a week a month  it will always be there and I know that I will always have to keep my guard up My Life depends on it!.
I am praying for you Sara and His family. God Bless you always.

[dominosarah]

I never hung out with him outside of work but the people that come into the station are MY customers and it is important to me that they are treated with respect.  We have a treatment center on the outskirts of town and they all come in too.  It is called "The House of Hope", to the other people in this town it is referred to as "The House of Dope".  Years ago i would of thought that too.  I was way better than those type of people as i had myself convinced that i wasnt like them.  Thankfully i found recovery and with that i found compassion~

[ActingBrandNew]

My condolences Sarah!

[IBKleen]

It seems I spend a lot of time saying I am sorry for your loss. He did not die in vein. Someone will get clean because of him. Sadly, that's the way it works. Still, it is hard to see that while you are grieving. Know I am praying for you and love you my friend.

[clean_in_ks]

Thanks, Sara, for sharing this with us.  I'm sorry your heart had to experience yet another loss of someone you reached out to and cared about.  
The reality that "that someone" could really be me if I "go out" even one more time and test the waters.  I find myself so affected now when I'm aware that addiction has taken yet another precious life.

This past week, I listened to Whitney Houston singing "I Will Always Love You"......it actually came on twice within a 3 day period which I found odd.  She had SUCH passion and tenderness.... and really belted it out and "got me" in that song.  I found silent tears running down my face both times I listened to it....and said to my husband.....what a tragic loss, what a beautiful woman, how gifted and talented she was.  I will ALWAYS hurt for suffering addicts....because you see, I was one~  

[Kbusymom]

So sorry for the loss of your friend and thanks for the reminder about one more time.  When I was on heroin years ago, I lost so many friends.  I almost died a couple of times myself; but I always wondered why them and not me?
When I started going to meetings, I heard "some die, so that others may live." I think that's supposed to be comforting, but it wasn't for me.  I still wonder.
I'm so glad Brandon had you as a friend.