Aa
PLS PLS HELP ME
I literally feel like i cannot go on another day like this. LIke many of you, I have tried day 1 many many many times, and it's like as soon as that thought comes to my mind strong enough, I got get 12 devils. blue devils= lortab 10. i am literally about to lose everything that matters to me and it's still not enough for me to stop?! i take anywhere from 24-36/day. i work, trying to keep up my persona, but deep inside im DEAD! im merely just existing. i want offffffffffffffffff of this train! it's like i know what's waiting for me on the other side, but I CAN'T GET THERE! i cant manage to get past day one. the anxiety is a beast, the runs is a beast, im just blah and cannot imagine going another minute in that condition much less 3 days. please someone who has done or is in process of doing it, PLEASE TELL ME HOW YOU DID IT. how do you conquer the mind games, the sweats, the irritable bowels, the shakes, AND TRY TO FUNCTION in everyday life. i cannot take off to do this. i have to work and maintain my home, but i HAVE HAVE HAVE TO BE DONE WITH THIS. i know the physical is one thing and the mental is another, but if i can get past at least the physical, then i can work on the mental. at this point, i just don't know how to do ANY OF IT. i can literally see my life disappearing before my eyes. so behind on bills, so lazy at home, dont want to do anything with out khowing that i'll have my 12 pills to get me going. please someone tell me how! how did YOU do it?! i am sooooooooooooooo desperate. i do want to be clean more than i want to be high. now its like i just take them to be somewhat normal, then they wear off and im tired, fuzzy, lazy, moody, then my mind wants MORE. how did this happen?! HOW IN GOD'S NAME DID I GET HERE? LORD MY ONLY WISH IS TO BE CLEAN AND WORK ON GETTING MY LIFE WHERE IT NEEDS TO BE!
CAN SOMEONE, ANYONE, TAKE THE TIME AND TELL ME HOW YOU DID IT? FYI , im not yelling, im just soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo ready for change! i feel stuck. i feel like the devil has captured me and will not let me go! my faith is real. i believe in God and honestly it's only by His grace that I havent lost it all yet.
please help me.
thank you for your time
kas
CAN SOMEONE, ANYONE, TAKE THE TIME AND TELL ME HOW YOU DID IT? FYI , im not yelling, im just soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo ready for change! i feel stuck. i feel like the devil has captured me and will not let me go! my faith is real. i believe in God and honestly it's only by His grace that I havent lost it all yet.
please help me.
thank you for your time
kas
Welcome....You have gotten some great advice here! I was in the exact same situation as you are now. I spent years trying to quit, I would make it a day up to a couple of weeks but that was only a couple of times. This last time I finally looked at myself and said " I am sick and tired of being sick and tired". I was going through thousands of dollars, I was trapped in the bottle! I too no longer got high from the pills and I was taking them just to feel "normal". This last time I looked at my health, my family, and my future and knew that if I did not treat this disease the same way I would if I had cancer then I would never quit so that is what I did. NO ONE knew my little secret and that kept me sick. I finally bit the bullet and asked my wife, doctor, and family for help. It was one of the scariest and humiliating things I have EVER DONE but I knew that I needed a support group to quit this time. They were all shocked and a little disappointed but they actually were relieved to finally figure out what was wrong with me. I found a good AA group (I did not like NA) and they accepted me in even though I was there for pills. I used the aforementioned supplements and vitamins and my doctor gave me some stuff to help as well. I jumped cold turkey and have not used a pill since. It was tough and I struggled the first month or so but I am here to say that it is completely worth it. I laugh, I cry, I have saved thousands of dollars and now have a fantastic relationship with family and friends. I do the same things if not more than I did while on pills. I get a lot of satisfaction from completing a task that I normally would never do unless I had a lot of pills sober. You just have to dig deep and keep the end goal in mind.
Well....We are all here to help and if you would like more ideas on detox tools, you can message me.....Good luck and God bless!
Well....We are all here to help and if you would like more ideas on detox tools, you can message me.....Good luck and God bless!
Definitely - talk to your husband. He loves you and as long as he truly knows how badly you want this he's going to help you. So take ALL the help you can get - there's no shame when you're trying to do the right thing for yourself and your family. It's time to let go and let others help you. It's TIME.
:)
:)
You're taking A LOT. I really think you should taper that down before jumping off completely. It won't shock your body so much. I'm thinking...you really need to get with a doctor!
Everything you describe is something we've all felt. Perfectly natural.
You really need to tell your husband. You need his help and it's way too hard to keep this a secret forever. I promise you that.
Everything you describe is something we've all felt. Perfectly natural.
You really need to tell your husband. You need his help and it's way too hard to keep this a secret forever. I promise you that.
Thanks again, everyone. I know by Saturday I won't be perfect. I just mean well enough to get out and go to the game. I want some of weight, stress lifted from me. I can see glimpses of 'real life' even through this hell and I want it so bad! Yes, fear has absolutely taken over my brain at this point. I know to stock up on vitamins, immodium, melatonin. What to do about the anxiety. My goal is to handle this all natural. I don't want anymore drugs, benzos...nothing. will I be able to work? Is there anything else that I can do? I know its going to be hard. I just want to be able to function. My husband has some knowledge that I had a history dabbing with the pills but he thinks that phase is long gone...although I know he suspects something, because he can't understand why we're always broke. I know this is a battle ill fight forever, but I want to at least get to the point where I have SOME clean time. I need to change my attitude about this and just FIGHT, but even the thought of fighting scares me to death. I look at all these people smiling, shopping, walking, etc...and I want that! I do! I sooooo want that! I just want to know who I am. This has been going on for 3 years...gradually getting worse. I know that I'm taking too much and there have been times I was scared to sleep, afraid I wouldn't wake up. I've shook this once for 2 months, the other time like 1.5 weeks...even during those times my worst day clean, doesn't equate to how I feel everyday that I'm taking pills! I don't have pain. There's no reason for me to even be taking pain pills. We're wanting to conceive #2, my daughter is 5. I'm afraid that ice caused perm damage and now I'm infertile. I know I don't want to continue like this...I just don't know how to fight hard enough to actually stop. But I want it more than anything in this world..for me, for my family, for my future, for my blessings to come. I can't so anything until I get myself right.
I agree with littlebit that is a lot of apap for the liver to handle at once. I was on norcos and even more then 12 of those a day is too much! If you absolutely can't take off of work and have Saturday and Sunday off is to stop saturday morning, make sure you get a full night sleep. Flush everything you have down the toilet. Take some immodium as it will help with the chills and runs, and find something to keep yourself occupied for those two days. Day 3 you will still be in w/d but they will be a little better you should be able to function minimally at your job (The hardest part will be the irritability and the lack of concentration). Go and see your doctor tell him whats going on he will probably give u some xanax or benzos to help you sleep. Like you said the psychological aspect is a different animal in and of itself and can be dealt with once you get through the physical process. I quit 120-200mg hydro per day and 50mg oxy 70mg hydro on certain days (very rarely though) and my w/d were hot flashes / cold sweats / runs / mild back pain / and irritability. If you don't throw up at all consider it a godsend as that was what I dreaded most but it never happened. You can do this just take it one day at a time.
Well said littlebit!! And you too vicki (of course that's my girl!). You CAN do this plsaveme. And we're here to help. :)
1. You are taking enough that from what I have learned here it is a one way ticket to death. Your liver cannot take that much and it will stop working.
2. The fear of withdrawals has taken over your brain to the point you can't see that the fear is larger than the actual process.
I agree, you need a plan. There are many supports here to get clean. I had many day 1, 2, 3, 4 and then went back to the pills as fast as I could. The ONLY way I got clean, was to run out and cold turkey it. I found this place in my second day and it was a life saver. I am 38 days clean and could not have done it this long without the help I got here.
Your willingness to get clean must be more than your need for the drugs. The pills are no longer making you feel better, they are now killing you.
I quit because I wanted to feel again, to laugh, to sleep without feeling drugged the next day, smile with my kids and not watch the clock before I could get home and take a pill or not go someplace because I ran out or could not get myself off the couch to get ready to go....
I hope you can find a way to get clean, either by talking to your doctor to help you get clean, rehab, coming here to get the support, attend an NA meeting to meet others like yourself or all of the above!
There is always hope...but you have to take the first step!
2. The fear of withdrawals has taken over your brain to the point you can't see that the fear is larger than the actual process.
I agree, you need a plan. There are many supports here to get clean. I had many day 1, 2, 3, 4 and then went back to the pills as fast as I could. The ONLY way I got clean, was to run out and cold turkey it. I found this place in my second day and it was a life saver. I am 38 days clean and could not have done it this long without the help I got here.
Your willingness to get clean must be more than your need for the drugs. The pills are no longer making you feel better, they are now killing you.
I quit because I wanted to feel again, to laugh, to sleep without feeling drugged the next day, smile with my kids and not watch the clock before I could get home and take a pill or not go someplace because I ran out or could not get myself off the couch to get ready to go....
I hope you can find a way to get clean, either by talking to your doctor to help you get clean, rehab, coming here to get the support, attend an NA meeting to meet others like yourself or all of the above!
There is always hope...but you have to take the first step!
I agree with I'mDoneNoMore! There are no surprises here and no miracles that will happen by Saturday...that's being realsitic.
It can be done and done well.
Tell us what you know to do so far and we'll try to fill you in. You need to accept the fact that you're not going to feel good in a couple of days. It takes some time to feel "normal" again without the pills.
Please know that so much of this is not your fault. I get the thing about taking pills now "just to feel normal". Most of us got to that point and it's a rotten place. Your brain chemicals are way out of whack. That accounts for so much of this.
Does Your husband know about any of this?
My advice would be to tell him and ask for help. Then, stock up on supplies to help with your detox: Immodium,gatorade,soups,protein shakes,Alteril (for sleep), Hylands Restful legs( for RLS),Epsom salts for hot baths, a heating pad... I always suggest getting a doctor involved in any detox.
I would suggest that you taper your dose for a couple of weeks. You'll need help with that and most of a good taper involves having some else hold your pills, then decreasing your dose over several weeks.
We all have wanted this to be DONE once we make up our minds but it just doesn't work that way. It's a process but we'll help you as much as we can!
Keep posting!
It can be done and done well.
Tell us what you know to do so far and we'll try to fill you in. You need to accept the fact that you're not going to feel good in a couple of days. It takes some time to feel "normal" again without the pills.
Please know that so much of this is not your fault. I get the thing about taking pills now "just to feel normal". Most of us got to that point and it's a rotten place. Your brain chemicals are way out of whack. That accounts for so much of this.
Does Your husband know about any of this?
My advice would be to tell him and ask for help. Then, stock up on supplies to help with your detox: Immodium,gatorade,soups,protein shakes,Alteril (for sleep), Hylands Restful legs( for RLS),Epsom salts for hot baths, a heating pad... I always suggest getting a doctor involved in any detox.
I would suggest that you taper your dose for a couple of weeks. You'll need help with that and most of a good taper involves having some else hold your pills, then decreasing your dose over several weeks.
We all have wanted this to be DONE once we make up our minds but it just doesn't work that way. It's a process but we'll help you as much as we can!
Keep posting!
Well I think the first thing you have to do is be realistic about what this is going to take.
To say you have to be well enough for this weekend - AND quit cold turkey. No - it CAN'T be done - you are going to have to live with doing the bare minimum (stuff just to get by) for a while yet. There's NO other way to do this. Seriously - I'm not yelling at you I'm just trying to get you to hear what you're saying.
Addiction is serious and quitting is as serious as it gets. Please try to think about this more calmly - I know easier said than done. But unless you give yourself a FIGHTING chance here you're fighting a losing battle.
Is inpatient rehab at all an option for you? That might be what you need so it gives you the time you need to focus on getting well. It sounds like you're trying to keep up w/your regular pace WHILE detoxing and let me tell you - that's really REALLY hard to do.
You can end this madness. You just need a good plan. :)
To say you have to be well enough for this weekend - AND quit cold turkey. No - it CAN'T be done - you are going to have to live with doing the bare minimum (stuff just to get by) for a while yet. There's NO other way to do this. Seriously - I'm not yelling at you I'm just trying to get you to hear what you're saying.
Addiction is serious and quitting is as serious as it gets. Please try to think about this more calmly - I know easier said than done. But unless you give yourself a FIGHTING chance here you're fighting a losing battle.
Is inpatient rehab at all an option for you? That might be what you need so it gives you the time you need to focus on getting well. It sounds like you're trying to keep up w/your regular pace WHILE detoxing and let me tell you - that's really REALLY hard to do.
You can end this madness. You just need a good plan. :)
My mind is dead. I am not even myself anymore. I'm losing my mind and cannot step over to the other side. I cant pretend to be normal. IM not. I am dead. This us truly how I feel. Praying that I can pretend to me mommy and wifey this evening.
Thank you all that have responded thus far. I don't want to taper. I can't. My goal is to be well enough by Saturday to go to the basketball game with my husband. I am terrified of withdrawals, yet I'm living in hell right now. So in order to get out of hell, I should be willing to do whatever it takes, right. But I'm paralyzed by fear. Like I feel like I cannot do this.
Have u tried tappering down what I did was a week before I decided to quite I got everything from the Thomas recipe and started that a week before so the vitamines have time to set in and I decided to just jump off I was taking loracets than I could not find them so I started taking hydrocodone 7.5/500 u have to really want this its not easy I slept with the help of valium for the 4 first days it helped than I stop the valium on the 5 th day and it was not as bad I'm on day 25 and I feel like my self again its worth it keep posting and good luck
Hi,this can be done.You may need to cut off access to your supply either by giving your money to someone you trust or cutting oof your dealer.If you could just take off friday and monday.You could get through the worst of it that way.If you are taking 36 a day you may even save yourself some money on those two days.I have been off of oxy for thirty two days(large amount).It can be done.You have any friends that could come and sit with you the first few days?There are many options and many people her to help.There are also alot of things you can do and take to minimize the withdrawal.I know it sukx you will be glad that you did this after it's over
Have an Answer?
You are reading content posted in the Addiction: Substance Abuse Community
Is treating glaucoma with marijuana all hype, or can hemp actually help?
If you think marijuana has no ill effects on your health, this article from Missouri Medicine may make you think again.
Julia Aharonov, DO, reveals the quickest way to beat drug withdrawal.
Tricks to help you quit for good.
A list of national and international resources and hotlines to help connect you to needed health and medical services.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
