Pain meds to methadone and back

[Ldytaz]

Hi, I have been reading these posts and would like to ask for some help.I have tapered from 100 mgs - 30.The last couple weeks have been hard.Tomorrow I go to 25 mgs.My plan is to keep going for at least 2 more months.I'm going to go get the cal/magn,protein drinks and other stuff I have read about here.When I first went to the clinic 2 years ago I was convinced by them it was to be a slice of heaven.I havent been on anything but methadone since I started going.My Family convinced me that my pain was all in my head.I decided that I didnt need pain meds anymore,so off I went,joined the program and started paying 98.00 a week.Now,my counselor at clinic tells me I am a perfect candidate for pain meds.lol.I repeat.lol...So I am supposed to forget about the last 2 years and go back.This is my problem ,I am in so much pain,sometimes I dont want to get up at all.I have been fighting for disability to have 3 surgeries.Im scared to go back to meds.I have made 2 appts that I canceled. Please give me some feedback.I dont know what to do.Oh yeah,Im 53 have worked my butt off til 4 years ago,when I got injured.

[VICourageous]

Very nice reply above Ldytaz..I have Faith in YOU... Keep holding on to your Support and Positive thinking. Yes it does get harder to detox when we get older. Keep on stepping up those Steps and do not fall down..Och!!!
I wish you the best that Life can give..Remember to always keep that Guard Up!!
Bless
Vickie

[Ldytaz]

So,I took last dose of 5mg yesterday at 7am.I think since I tapered so fast Im feeling worse for the wear here.week,sweaty,shakey and hurt like hell.I have coughed and sneezed so much my side aches.but,Im ok with it.I have my last take home from Monday and decided enough is enough.So,I didnt take it..I know it will get better.I just have to try and not think about it.My Grandson just got home from school so I have to go now.be back later for some input.One day at a time again.lol

[Ldytaz]

Day 1 with nothing but,vitamins and luck... Pretty tired today. Just tying to get through with little pain. Coming here is a part of my daily program. Hope everyone is having a good day.

[Ldytaz]

I just got back from taking my Husband to work.As soon as I dropped him off something hit me and I cried all the way home.I know I need to get back on Prozac but,it is so hard to go there after being gone for 2 years.People take for granted the everyday tasks and things we just fight to get through.i was remembering all those years ago when I decided to take my life back and get off methamphetamine.It was hard but,I did it just to be back here 17 years later.I was so young then.I went back to work,gym,tanning all the stuff I no longer do.When I got hurt the first time and went on tabs I still thought myself clean because I was still going to meetings and it was a script from a dr.I still thought myself clean all the way til I decided to get off.Then there was the 2 years on methadone.Why I went there I dont know.I was frustrated with my dr and just wanted off.Now Im seeing an end again.if u newbys here get nothing from us get this.The weight of our additcion is what we deal with everyday.It is a life choice to be clean.Whether u take it for medical reasons or for pleasure it is a curse that will bring u down.I want to be free.I want to go out. I live on the beach and never see the sun.I want to fill up that pool this year(havent for 2) and take my Grandson swimming.I want to have sex without hurting.I want to walk without a cane.I want to not be an addict....But,I am and with all these things I want,I can not have with the drug.So,here I am,telling myself again and u we can do this..Take it 1 day at a time and see your freedom.I can almost see mine,,, again..Later

[Ldytaz]

just want to check in.This going from 15-5mgs in 5 days has about killed me.I almost took 2mg more today but stopped myself.the headaches and sneezing(yes I finally got them) are terrible but,I can see an end so I plunge on.I will be be later....