Positive Thinking ugh!

Not so much a question just hoping for some positive words from my sober friends :) ( or prayer if you do that)....So Im feelin really good about myself being 10 days sober and last nite I actually got some pretty decent sleep except I had the WORST realistic seeming dream of my life!! I dreamed in vivid detail that my son was killed and Im like walking around my house in my dream calling out for him like I do normally like "everett everett! come here please" and he doesn't answer obviviously because he died in my dream and I just cry and cry and literally I woke up crying....so I got the rest I was praying for but gosh what a horrible dream ugh! So my daughter is having tube surgery tomorrow morning bright and early and now im all freaked out that someting bad will happen ( I know that is silly b/c its like barely even real surgery and my son had it done w/ no probs at all) but now im all freaked out and noramlly i would just take a few pills and feel better and it would be out of my mind but since Im not doin it I have to deal with my ridiculus feelings.....sorry that was a rant i guess.....I just would appreciate you guys to tell me IM CRAZY STUPID or something and that im getting worked up for no reason and its all good....and if you do pray think about my daughter in your prayers (her name is Addison) THANK YOU GUYS! **hugs**

[staticage]

good morning,sorry bout bad dream...cant call u crazy though,i woke up tryn to fight this shadow thing n my room...congrads on 10 days....im sure some strange days ahead for all of us..and yes i will say prayer for u,,and everyone who needs help....b cool...

[amber22245]

lol sorry thats funny....reminds me of when i went to rehab before on nite 1 they gave me an ambien and a muscle relaxer to sleep and this therapist guy or whatever had to come by to evaluate me and write me a prescription for suboxone for when i left until i found a therapist and he didnt come until freakin midnite so i was out and when he woke me up I thought there was a big black monkey lookin woman with a beard tryin to eat me!! and he was just an average overweightish white dude ...thanks for makin me laugh at least lol shadow people are hard to fight :)

[staticage]

the funny thing was after i woke up, i was like yeah..where u at now ghost,,scared of light ,,what...then i laid back down like i just won the ufc belt...lookd at clock and smiled..as it was day 6....

[amber22245]

lol thats funny - you are kinda winnin a ufc belt fightin this beast :)

[dominosarah]

We seem to dream really weird stuff early in our recovery.  I remember some of mine and they were way out there!   It does go away thank god!

Your daughter will come thru her surgery with flying colors.  I know it is stressful but it will be over before you know it.  Let us know how she is doing.

[jlannspr]

Don't trouble yourself with tomorrow's worries; we have enough worries today. Great job on 10 days!!

[amber22245]

thank you :) i will

[MikeInFrance]

Amber,  It took me a really long time to get any sleep as well so you can just imagine what kind of strain that must put on us so when we finally do manage to sleep the dreams we may have can be way out there.  Dreaming is a good sign because I don't think I even had a single dream the entire year I  was using.  You are doing great!

Addison will be fine she's got alot of prayers coming her way now.. ;)

[amber22245]

Thank you! I'm so nervous

[NeverDreamed]

Hey there. Your daughter is in my prayers today..and through her surgery if its not complete already.  I'm day48 today and am dreaming so often now.  In the beginning of detox my dreams were crazy and very sexual.. sorry if that's too much.. haha. My dreams have calmed down but are very often.. its great. Congrats on day 10..keep up the good work.

[lulu747]

Amber,

Oh darlin', I hear you on the vivid dreams.  Everything goes into overdrive when we first get sober...Dreams, smells, tastes, emotions.  I am praying that your daughter's surgery was successful and that you are resting easy.  Remember that our minds are very powerful, especially sober.  I know it's tough, but stay in the moment and don't worry yourself into a situation that has not come to pass yet.  We can't control the future, or change the past...All we have is this moment.  Let us know how you and your daughter are.

Sending big cyber hugs,
Lu

[amber22245]

thank you guys its almost 4am here...cant sleep ne more....going to the hospital at 6 so ill post when its over  thank u for ur prayers..

[zoea]

Let us know how it goes. All will be fine.
The dreams yes Im having them to.

Have faith

be strong
Zoe x

[minn66]

I had no idea the vivid dreams are so common! I have them a lot. Hubby has woken me several times because I was crying (and a couple of times laughing) in my sleep. I am thinking of you and hope all went well with your daughter.

[amber22245]

thank you guys! :) She did just fine and we are home resting....they gave her some med before they took her so she wasnt even that upset leaving me so that was good!

[NorthEast213]

Glad to hear everything went well Amber!

[phiaNorcoqueen]

that is so awesome to hear.. I'm so thankful your little one is healing ..  

[IW63boomer]

     You are doing great!  Wonderful progress!  I am going into day eight and the anxiety and sleeplessness is bad.  But it is like when I was hurting after any surgery or injury – I had to remember that while I might be in pain today, the day will come when I won’t be in pain anymore.  The crazy thoughts are what they are.  I can’t wish them away when they come into my head, so I try to recognize them for what they are, which is just silly, exaggerated ideas that don’t mean anything.  
     I try to view my progress in two or three day periods.   What I mean is that I can compare my progress today, which is better than yesterday, but I try to look back further.  I want to look back to where I was on day three, or day two.  If I look over that span of time, I can really see progress.  Then I can be very encouraged and it makes me realize that where I will be in another three days is way, way beyond where I am now.  This is just a mind game I play, but it helps.  
     This will all pass and fade away.  Try to think about the incredible lessons you are learning through this miserable, painful process.  You are growing and you will grow in ways that you would never have dreamed possible.  You will not only have gained great strength yourself, but you will have learned about addictions and the processes of kicking habits.  Someday, you will take that knowledge, combine it with your own love and compassion, and use it to help another desperate, struggling soul.  Then you will experience what it means to be truly blessed.  On that day, when you are helping others, all of your hurt and pain will seem like such a blessing because of the comfort you will bring to someone else.
     You are doing fine!  Hang in there and keep it up!  Each day is better than the last!