How are you feeling? Are you going to start the cold turkey w/ds?
I can't take tomorrow or Tuesday but could after that. I really am so scared that this pharmacy thing is not done there is NO WAY I am going to try that again!!
Unfortunately, even though cold turkey withdrawals make me want to literally rip my own hair out..I'd say if you only have one day left then..Cold turkey it is. But what if in the midst of your cold turkey withdrawla,s you get desperate and do it again one last time at a different pharmacy? Are you sure you cant take a few days off work?
I think you're right only problem I am facing regarding wds ok other than they suck...but I am not at a place I can take time off right now at work. I will ave to suck it up and go in any way! If possible that is.
This place is pretty great isnt it :) It has helped save my life thats for sure!!
As far as C/T or taper or what have you. You say you take 30 a day and you have approx 30 left right? Well, IMO you might as well go c/t. To do a Taper now with what you have, will only prolong the w/d's you are going to have. It wont help ease them much because a Taper is suppose to be slow over a period of time. You have enough meds to do it for only a few days at best so your going to w/d' almost as if you went c/t! So I think you should just fush what you have and jump in!
Unless you have any underlying health issues, going c/t wont hurt you. You may feel like you want to die haha BUt you wont!
What are your thoughts about that??
Yes Teresa, I am done...I have about 30 pills...haven't sat and counted yet...so the question is do I flush one go ct or taper...typically I have been taking about 30 a day...24 hour period...part of me just says go ct and be done with it as I know if the pills are here I'll want them. I went ct last time and was fine and I was taking around the same amount..my pcp gave me meds then to help with wd I only used 1. So I do have that if needed.
I have a group of girls that I met online originally but we ended up meeting in person a couple of times now and for the last 9 years they have been amazing friends. We have been through a lot of ups and downs together and there are 6 of us that have just stuck together through it all. I emailed them a long letter last night and completely opened up about my addiction. The support I have gotten back has been so amazing, I was so ashamed, AM so ashamed but so far they have been so kind and I know they will be there for me!
And then there is this forum...I have never felt such immediate support from strangers before and spent many hours yesterday reading and crying...
I am so glad I found this board and have a place to go where I am not being judged!
RIght now, you need to focus on you getting clean and recoverying and while I think you should always be hoenst, Admiting to this and coming clean NOW will only cause you problems. Losing your job right now is not going to help you get clean!
Have you given thought to everything?? Are you done with these pills now?
Thanks over easy...I can't see confessing to the dr as an option as it will def mean the end of my job! That's not to say I don't think it's a good idea to let him know of my addiction...at some point.
I totally agree. I think this is enough to scare anyone straight.
Do not, repeat, do not fess up to the doctor. the phsrmacy do not have the time to repeatly contact the doctor office about this. the already did and will not do it again. just get clean and never do it again :)
Thank you so much Cess. I appreciate your prayers so much.
I know you can get clean w Gods help. I went up for prayer at my church and told the lady I was addicted to pain meds and had her pray for me. I was scared out of my mind to do it. And very ashamed. But I did it and know without a doubt That I have people praying for me to get better.
I will be praying for u to get clean and find peace!!!
Hi there, I read through all this thread and I can tell you from experience on both side (working for a physician and being the one who fraudulantly wrote the rx's) that chances are when you faxed back, it was done and you will likely not have any issues from this.
My attorney told me that they WANT to catch you red handed. Meaning, when she gave you the meds, they would have had the police there if they knew for sure it was forged. FOr a scheduled 2 narcotic its also doubtful they would have given you the RX if they had any questions at all without talking to the Dr's office. They risk alot as well.
Now, I need to tell you this because I was you in the beginning! I was questioned by a pharmacy, they faxed to the Dr I worked for and I caught the fax before anyone and saved myself. You would have thought that I would have learned my lesson there. I did not! Long of the short of it is, "almost" getting caught didnt scare me enough apparently. I eventually did get caught and ruined my career and almost went to prison. THIS IS A WAKE UP CALL TO YOU!! You may have dodged a big bullet my friend, But if you keep thumbing your nose at fate, you WILL pay the consequences! I wish I would have had someone to tell me this when i was you, then.
Please take this sign and get help! These pills arent worth it. You can and will lose everything.
If you have any questions, you can always PM me. I wish you the best!!
I completely agree kme. I wll kill this monster this time.
But if you dont get right now you will get desprte again and will do whats needed to get what tou want n it only becomes a monster if you keep feeding it.
I agree w BARBRTR they got the fax back. They arent investigators
Good for you for getting honest. I was waiting for that. Now you need to listen to the advise given. These members have been where you are and can relate and make suggestions. I hope this was a wake up call for you hun and hope you get clean and can put all of this behind you.
Keep posting talking. Let us know how you are doing.
I sincerely would recommend a consultation with a lawyer. This is a rough situation, not only did you forge a script, but communicating on behalf of the doctor to cover your crime is not good.
I sincerely hope you get the help you need, and I hope nothing big comesd out of this...but there's no guarantees, unfortunately. Sometimes investigations can take months.
Does the pharmacist know you work there?
I agree with Sonrissa. Ask your pastor about the churches view on confidentiality. I know the Catholic church keeps all things told in confession confidential.
You do need to talk with someone who can guide you with this. It's going to weigh on your mind for quite awhile.
I was tangled up in a fraud case like that. A friend stole a pad from a bone n joint place n i worked in a liquor store. This pharm kept coming in and buying vodka while he was at work in the kmart pharm. He used to flirt w me all the time so long story short we did it quite a few times for oxy 80s, 40s, and 20s. I found out the pharm who worked there drunk was being investigated for taking our scripts. I thank god was not on the video when they aired it over the local news. You saw the women i was filling them w n my back. So they were only looking foe her. Its a federal case and if she didnt start giving up the big time players she wouldnt have gotten off w a slap on the wrist. Your prob lucky this time but being this doc trusts you as his employee you will for sure be looking down the barrell of a gun. Damage is done now so you should enjoy the pills you may have paid your freedom for and get your **** together. Or maybe just toss them because i see a suprise drug test in the future.
Oh and Barb...rationally I think the same thing too regarding the fax...working in healthcare I have sent back plenty of faxes that verify or state not out pt and don't get anything back....but the paranoid side of my brain says...."oh my god what if they fax it back again just to say thanks?!" Which is why I plan on getting to work first Monday am as well!
You might ask your pastor first if you are able to confess something serious to him, and if he is able to keep it confidential or under what circumstance he would have to break your confidence! Talk to him before you give him any details! That way you will know!
I will tell you, ther but for the Grace of God, go I. I can remember feeling so desperate when I ran out of pills, I probably would have done anything to get them! I would have bought them off the street, if I knew how! I was lucky, I didn't! You have made a great decision to quit and reach out for help. I understand, and I feel for you!
Not to scare you but, you are better off to come clean to the Dr or the Dr's office.
It is very possible that he/she will find out.
I am currently being charged with several felony counts of prescription fraud and I can tell you, if I had it to do again, I would have came clean before I let it get out of hand and then was arrested.
If you do get away with this, it likely will not be the last time you will go to these extremes to get the drugs.
Message me if you want to talk.
Sarah
Thank you Barb. I know what you mean by the feeling of getting away with it means I may just be tempted to go back...but I swear I want it. People talk about near death experiences and their lives flash before their eyes...I feel like that has happened with me. I look at my beautiful babies and think oh my god what if I have to leave them and go to jail? How could I do that to them?? For that!! And for me!! I will beat this. I am so glad I found this site as I need all the support I can get.
Now Brit has me too worried to tell my pastor but I need his support through this. Maybe I just tell about the addiction and leave it at that? I just don't want to lie to him and sometimes omission of the truth is the same thing!