Could it be???

[tiff78g]

As some of you may remember, my bf is in rehab. He has been there since Dec. 2. He received a weekend pass this past weekend and I am conflicted. I love this man to death, and we have a baby together, BUT, how can he go from a drug addict who is telling lies, hiding things from me, stealing my money, no motivation to do anything other than use, to a man who now believes in putting his life in God's hands. I just dont get it and I find it hard to believe.  I read this website daily and I hear tells of the horrible withdraws, why did he not seem to experience that? Of course he said he had some, but he never once complained or anything. Can it really be? Is it possible that for the last 15 years of his life he has had some sort of drug of choice ranging from coke, oxy's, alcohol, heroine, you name it and he was using it, to absolutely nothing and religious w/ out some of the battles you guys share? I just dont understand how it has been so easy for him. Sure he has his days when he no longer wants to be in rehab, but he makes it through them. He says he has urges sometimes, but just prays. I have been lied to by him so many times I just find this all hard to believe. He is good at getting me to believe things, so maybe I have just put up a wall.  Any insight would be greatly appreciated.

[house1]

W/Ds are in different stages depending on strength of drug and time used.
Stage one W/Ds can be just heavy sleeping for a couple of days after a binge.
Stage two and three have much more serious symptoms.

If he has been inpatient than he is clean and yes there are many triggers. He will
be tested when he returns so I wouldn't worry about him using during his weekend pass.
Your concerns are very important ones truth is very key here. Its time to look each other in the eyes and be truthful. If you think a relationship is possible he must understand how you feel about his addiction and what you expect him to do about it to help himself.
You can't help him only support him so he has to do the work but remember addiction is for life and Recovery is hard work and requires a commitment.
I wish you luck, don't be afraid to be honest about your feelings and then he will make his own mind up what his next moves will be.

[toxictome]

God works miracles and maybe this is just what  he needed to open himself up to something greater than himself...the 12 step program they use in recovery talks about a higher power..it can be God, a tree, the people at the mtgs., whatever one wants..but for me thaat power is God....and he works in me and thru me daily to help me to reach out to others like myself...maybe  you could try a narc-anon mtg. to get an idea what he is learning about..or buy the book Narcotics Anonymous an dread it...jsut some suggestions....but i would try to embrace the new and improved him...i know you are leary but maybe he really is changing.....

[tiff78g]

Thanks for the quick responses. He did not get anything for the withdraws in rehab, he had to drop a clean urine to even get in. I know they are busy all day with classes, bible study, devotions and church. I guess it is just hard for me to accept the change.  When he went to rehab it was a combination of things. I had kicked him out of our house, he had no where to live, no money, and was using like crazy. I think his life was falling apart and he called me one day and said he wanted to go to rehab.  Once he was there, he at first hated it, he fought tooth and nail, but he made it and now he loves it. I guess I just need to let up a little. I just do not want to get hurt or let down again. This has been such a rollercoaster ride already and it is just hard for me since I have never been an addict.

[cathy5841]

did they give him anything in rehab to minimize the w/d symptoms?  i cant answer those questions about the w/ds, but i can tell you as a person coming from the addicted life, that God has totally changed me.  ipush alot of religon here, but without the Grace of God and His holding my hand everystep of this journey and the help fo this site, which i firmly believe God brought me to i would not be where i am.  you can message me if youd like and we can talk more about what i believe.
many prayers
cathy

[toxictome]

Time will tell...that's what you do in rehab..learn how to live life clean...its' pretty much all day long classes, groups , mtgs., NA mtgs...

he  has been there 3 months plus...so i believe he could change....what was his attitude going in? Did he want to go or did he go for someone else?

Good luck...keep posting......