Aa
Dat 17 today...was surrounded...
Back at work today,not even there 15min and my freind shows me hanful of big yellow percs...All i said was not now,ill call u..dont call me..after few more run ins..I had worst crave kick in..felt like wds kickn again, had slight ache and jittery feeling..It was tough today,even askd myself what if just 1 a night..my dr apt is thurs..,,i have59 left...my mind was really giving me a hard time...unfortunatley my job would be easier on percs,,for the pain and energy....I wish they werent so evil..right now is the most confused ive been since first week..If this is hard to read sorry...day17 felt like i was about to go back nto wds while i was at work..feeln better now though...thanx everyone....lil scatterbrain tonight..
Thanx for posts...Lots to think about this week..But like i said..im not gonna use tonight..And im 99.9% im not gonna use tommorow..I will talk to my dr about other meds...maybe medical mj....jk....hope everyone has good night and dont forget..LIVE IN THE MOMENT....THIS IS OUR TIME.....will pray for myself and my medhelp letter people freinds...good night..
That's gotta be tough. You can't white knuckle your recovery. Willpower has nothing to do with a life without pills. You have come a long way...17 days! Wow that is an amazing accomplishment. I really feel for you as you struggle with rationalizing your way to use. Deep down you know this will not work. Pain is a real barrier to recovery. When we detox the pain seems to hit 10 fold. The good new is there are many different non-narcotic alternatives to pain management and I encourage you to talk to your doctor .Accupuncture is a great therapy to combat addiction and pain. Another thing- you seem like a straight up guy and I know you have the courage to tell your contacts that you are leaving the pills behind. You will save yourself alot of needless torment in the long run. And for goodness sake flush those pills or at the very least give them to someone you trust to hang on to them for you until you are ready to part with them. This isn't called addiction for nothing. It is just waiting for the opportune moment to sneak back in...like on day 17 or day 170. We are here to support you in the event of good or poor judgement. Meetings are invaluable. Not only will you meet some cool people who can support you on this journey but you seem like a seasoned person who can offer some much needed support and encouragement to others ;o) Keep us posted on how you are doing. Stay strong! Peace.
I know how you feel. for some reason around the two to three week mark. we think we can take a half or one and no big deal. we think we got a handle on our addiction. we start getting all twisted up inside. romanciimg the pills. justifying to ourselves. we learned our lesson. thoughts of i can handle it now. i can be responsible with them....oh do i know those thoughts. and they are all wrong. i hate to say once you've crossed the line into addiction. its there for life.
don't give in. your brain and body still remembers its fix. it still wants it..that's why we cave ...and work and bad friends can he triggers. it will pass. just a rocky road today with your first test.
I had 90 days clean. and still relapsed. addiction sits quietly. and waits. it will wait forever. so with that in mind. build a wall around you. don't associate with the pill buddies. they want someone to get high with. it helps them accept that they aren't the only ones using. misery loves company.
But the big question is why do you still hang on to your poison?? and what about the doctors appointment. how are you gonna handle that?? a wise dear friend i met here told me my doctor was my drug dealer. wow that one hit time with me. i was supposed to go to my doctor last wed. but i didn't show up. best decision i made. because if i went...well i would have walked our with my poison. and don't need it or want it. one day you'll feel like that too.
Just keep telling yourself your making smart responsible decisions for once.....doing the right things leads us to the right places....hugs bama .
don't give in. your brain and body still remembers its fix. it still wants it..that's why we cave ...and work and bad friends can he triggers. it will pass. just a rocky road today with your first test.
I had 90 days clean. and still relapsed. addiction sits quietly. and waits. it will wait forever. so with that in mind. build a wall around you. don't associate with the pill buddies. they want someone to get high with. it helps them accept that they aren't the only ones using. misery loves company.
But the big question is why do you still hang on to your poison?? and what about the doctors appointment. how are you gonna handle that?? a wise dear friend i met here told me my doctor was my drug dealer. wow that one hit time with me. i was supposed to go to my doctor last wed. but i didn't show up. best decision i made. because if i went...well i would have walked our with my poison. and don't need it or want it. one day you'll feel like that too.
Just keep telling yourself your making smart responsible decisions for once.....doing the right things leads us to the right places....hugs bama .
I know how you feel. for some reason around the two to three week mark. we think we can take a half or one and no big deal. we think we got a handle on our addiction. we start getting all twisted up inside. romanciimg the pills. justifying to ourselves. we learned our lesson. thoughts of i can handle it now. i can be responsible with them....oh do i know those thoughts. and they are all wrong. i hate to say once you've crossed the line into addiction. its there for life.
don't give in. your brain and body still remembers its fix. it still wants it..that's why we cave ...and work and bad friends can he triggers. it will pass. just a rocky road today with your first test.
I had 90 days clean. and still relapsed. addiction sits quietly. and waits. it will wait forever. so with that in mind. build a wall around you. don't associate with the pill buddies. they want someone to get high with. it helps them accept that they aren't the only ones using. misery loves company.
But the big question is why do you still hang on to your poison?? and what about the doctors appointment. how are you gonna handle that?? a wise dear friend i met here told me my doctor was my drug dealer. wow that one hit time with me. i was supposed to go to my doctor last wed. but i didn't show up. best decision i made. because if i went...well i would have walked our with my poison. and don't need it or want it. one day you'll feel like that too.
Just keep telling yourself your making smart responsible decisions for once.....doing the right things leads us to the right places....hugs bama .
don't give in. your brain and body still remembers its fix. it still wants it..that's why we cave ...and work and bad friends can he triggers. it will pass. just a rocky road today with your first test.
I had 90 days clean. and still relapsed. addiction sits quietly. and waits. it will wait forever. so with that in mind. build a wall around you. don't associate with the pill buddies. they want someone to get high with. it helps them accept that they aren't the only ones using. misery loves company.
But the big question is why do you still hang on to your poison?? and what about the doctors appointment. how are you gonna handle that?? a wise dear friend i met here told me my doctor was my drug dealer. wow that one hit time with me. i was supposed to go to my doctor last wed. but i didn't show up. best decision i made. because if i went...well i would have walked our with my poison. and don't need it or want it. one day you'll feel like that too.
Just keep telling yourself your making smart responsible decisions for once.....doing the right things leads us to the right places....hugs bama .
Yeah!!! You made a good choice,,not to use tonight! Im happy for you. Im sorry about all the pain. Hopefully your doctor can come up with a plan to transition you to a non addictive pain pill. ((hugs))~Bkitty
Thanx,I know its not the best to have them around,but i dont think about them until im out like at work...Honestly im lil confused,lil scenerios running thru my head..maybe 1..maybe half of 1...this all started today..actually was feeling restless last night..even had #2 come back....dont wanna go thru wds again..for nothing..Im not gonna use tonight...Will talk to dr about situation...I have legite pain and at least 8 to 10 yrs left to retire..thanx for the posts...I will not use tonight..
Im sorry it was a rough day for you. Your will was definately tested. So far you passed. Ive been there,,seen or dreamt about pills and Id start to salivate. You said you have 59pills left? And a doctor appoint this week. Why have you not thrown out the pills and cancelled that appoint. You saw how hard it was today just seeing those pills,,having access to them,that is a whole nother ballgame,,its only a matter of time before you relapse. This addiction will win hands down everytime! Just when you think you got a handle on it (addiction) it comes back with a vengence like never before! I sincerly and genuinely care about ya,,Im not trying to be harsh at all. Have you started any aftercare yet? It really really helps. I wish you the best! ~Bkitty
Dude I felt the same way last week at work, you don't need them, stay strong, stay with me day 18 tomorrow, we cam do this and the cravings will eventually go away.
Have an Answer?
You are reading content posted in the Addiction: Substance Abuse Community
Is treating glaucoma with marijuana all hype, or can hemp actually help?
If you think marijuana has no ill effects on your health, this article from Missouri Medicine may make you think again.
Julia Aharonov, DO, reveals the quickest way to beat drug withdrawal.
Tricks to help you quit for good.
A list of national and international resources and hotlines to help connect you to needed health and medical services.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
