Oxycontin/Vicodin Withdrawal

[Lar16]

I have a rare auto-immune disease that causes me great pain and fatigue.  My current rheumatologist has prescribed 20 mg of oxycontin twice daily and 10 mg of Vicodin 4x a day.  I have been on this treatment for the past year and want off.  I always take more than prescribed because both meds give me energy to take care of my four kids, household, and farm.  My doctor will not renew even a few days early.  The morning of the 26th I took my last oxycontin; I am out of Vicodin.  I have had severe chills, nausea, and diarhhea which are subsiding somewhat (I am taking Immodium because I was up all night in the restroom).  Currently, my most severe issues are a complete lack of energy and extreme depression.  I've already thought about taking all my lexapro and valium and ending it all but then I think about my children and I stop myself.  The doctor said something about suboxone but does not use it and can refer me elsewhere.  I'm afraid by then it will be too late.  I feel like such a drag on my family.  I'm sick enough as it is with Behcet's Disease and now to deal with this feels very overwhelming.

[Clamity2]

I believed the lie the addiction told me. "You get more work done and you are a better mother while you buzz" Excuse me but that is a lie you have convinced yourself of. As I had. Now with 31 days clean I get alot more housework, childcare, spousecare, etc friendship. With much more joy peace and quality time with all the above. You feel like **** now and will continue to feel that way every time you run out of pills and you will. I havent felt that hopelessness since I got my first 7 days clean the hope just started growing alittle each day.
Get clean for yourself and your 4 children. You all need you.

[Louhoo]

I understand...I have pain and fatigue w/o pills too. Try to take several hot baths a day w/stress relief foaming stuff (Aveeno stress relief worked for me) and try to explain to someone who can help you out for a while what you are going through. Try only to take the valium to sleep at night and type on this forum as much as you can. There are lots of people here that can understand and help you. But like rebel said if you are serious about suicide then really you should go to ER.

[uvlvrebel]

u r in w/d's.. look up PAWS (post acute withdrawal syndrome)... I too felt like if the large void that surrounded me would swallow me whole the world would be better off.  Don't do it.. it's a transient feeling and will pass.  if you need more, goto the ER.  

[buttercups]

OMG! I never thought I'd find someone else on here that suffered from behcet's as well! I've been away for a few days, so I haven't been in the forum, but I'm going to send you a PM.
I know exactly what you are going through! You can do this. I was in the exact same position as you only a few months ago.

You have a friend in this battle :))

[Lar16]

Here it is day 5 and I am finally managing to keep food down/in (mostly tomato soup and broth) and I managed to go to the health food store and get the l-tyrosine (with hubby driving).  Between that, the supplements I started last night, and the nutrition, I am turning a good corner.  I know there is a long row to hoe.  I have been on and off Vicodin many times in the 9 years I have had this disease and never had the problem I am having now that the oxycontin was added to my pain management.  It is evil, evil stuff.  I can't believe Guilani pushed for it.

Another thing, I am resentful of the lack of a proper heads-up from my rheumatologist.  He just said, "Be careful; this is the stuff Rush Limbaugh got in trouble with."  That was all, no warning about vitamin and mineral depletion or the difficult withdrawal symptoms.  I'm peeved (I could be a lot more crude but I need this group and want to
stay around.)

I just hope and pray somebody is looking out for me up there and will keep my disease at bay whilst I go through this.  At this point, and with the support I have received here, that is my main concern.

Good luck to all.  Take your vitamins, minerals, and the l-tyrosine.

[Louhoo]

I'm glad to see that you are feeling some better. Having someone help you through this will make it easier, not that this is easy in any way, shape, or form. Congradulations on day 5!! On day 7 or 8 I felt a whole lot better and then I felt worse for a while...pain from my condition flared up...but, with lots of rest vitamins and plenty fluids I got better. Remember hot baths really do help, I lived in the bathtub for days. Good luck and let us know how things are goin'.

[Lar16]

Your response truly helped me.  I hope and pray to get to where you are.  And I trust that the extra energy is indeed a lie; I'm so tired all the time.  I looked up the Thomas Recipe that everyone keeps talking about and have added vitamins that I had and plan on getting the l-tyrosine today.  I finally admitted it all to my husband and apologized and he is with me and helping, a huge relief.  For the first day since I stopped the meds (today is day 5), I feel some optimism for the future.  Thank you.