Valium Withdrawal

[MrKlown]

Hello, I would like to first say that this may be the wrong forum since I never did abuse this medication. I was given this medicine about 1 year ago and was prescribed as needed. As needed turned out to 1 5mg valium per day and has been that way for an extremely long time.  Anyone have any suggestions on quitting this? I tried to drop down to 2.5mg per day and I got so extremely shaky that I thought I was going to have a seizure. My panic disorder was hitting me super hard on the 2.5mg dose too. I am so confused and want help and have even considered a detox center but afraid of them because my friend went to one that was addicted to a benzo and he was completely yanked off of them and even had seizures. I don't want this to happen to me. Any advice?

[imadoit28]

from what ive heard drugs like valium and xanax can cause seizures when you quit cold turkey but if you taper slower i think cutting in half was maybe a little to much you should be fine i would talk to your primary doctor rather than go to a detox center and see what his advice is ...i had a friend taking about 3 times that a day adn he quit and was just very sick shakey for about a week ...i think that if you cut back slower have ur doc prescribe the 2 mg pills i beleive they make and then take 4 mg for a week then 3 and so on is what id suggest...good luck though and u be aight

[MrKlown]

That is a smart idea about the 4, 3, 2, 1. The only problem imadoit28 is that my panic disorder is going to come back with a vengeance regardless and that is the tough part. The seizures and possible death suck but the panic disorder is ugh. Even on valium I have panic attacks just not as often so it helps me able to deal with it. I shouldn't even need a benzo at 25 and I dunno what I did to deserve panic disorder but I do know that I got it. Mom tells me to go to church which yeah ok I would only the preacher told me he didn't want a gay person in there so that is out of the question. I had actually considering that cutting the 5mg down to 2.5 was a bit much and often wondered if taking 2 2.5mg pills, once in a morning, once in the evening would help change it any. I would think it would but I don't know. Rather not even talk to the doctor about it to be honest because I know my doctor and he's a very old angry man and will cut me off cold turkey.

[SophieShine]

Hi Mr Klown,

You are at the right place
I have been using 200mg of oxa + 40 mg of tranxene/day for 9 years. I'm tapering down very slowly for 10 months now and I'm 85% down from the initial doses.
If you want real info  about tapering, go to benzo.org.uk, You'll find the Ashton manual. there you can find all the tapering programs you can dream of. the usual tapering shedule is 20% a week but you really gotta listen to your body and be honest with yourself and, after a while, you'll "feel" when it's time to go down. I wish you all the luck and if you need more advice, fell free to msg me. You can do this. xxx. sophie

[MrKlown]

Yes but what about my panic disorder? I will be completely unmedicated and my panic disorders change me dramatically. I do want off the valiums, I really really do, it's just, at the same time I don't want my panic disorder to get worse and I know it will because it has been clinically shown to make panic disorder worse after quitting it. I'll check that out though for sure.

[dominosarah]

I have a friend who is currently tapering and he is going down .5mg every couple weeks.  You may want to try that.  That wouldnt be such a big jump for you.  There will be more people on in the morning as most are in bed and they will be able to give you a taper plan.  I do know you dont want to taper these to fast.  Have you always had panic attacks??

[dominosarah]

Is there some other medication they could give you for panic attacks??

[MrKlown]

I've had panic attacks since I was 20 years old and I am 25 now. They came out of nowhere, been to therapy, taken all the ssris known to man and they do not help at all for me, they make me 10x worse. Valiums were the only thing that worked for me. The doctor quit prescribing them to me if I am going to be honest about it and I found other means. I haven't abused them though and have stuck to a solid regimen but I think the regimen is what caused me to get in this addictive shape. I realize I lied a bit in earlier posts but only because I am a bit embarrassed about this. I couldn't afford to see the doctor anymore so I simply found another means to get them.

[MrKlown]

The only other medications that they would give me would be ssris and I can't handle those.

[dominosarah]

I thought something was amiss there but dont be embarrassed.  If you have these panic disorders will it be a good idea to get off them??  I am just asking here cuz i dont quite understand.  Have you ever tried some of the natural herbs they have?  

[MrKlown]

Being that it's the only medication that works for me, probably not the best idea to go off of them but I have to think ahead. What happens if I can't get anymore? I will possibly die if that is the case and that frankly is not worth it to me. I hate panic attacks and they cause me to be in agony constantly but better than death ... I guess anyway.

[dominosarah]

Is there any way you can get to the doctor and get these by legal means??  I just worry if you run out.  There are others on here that have panic attacks and may have some ideas for you too.  Keep posting here too.  More will be on in the morning as most are in bed now!!!

[stilltrying1965]

please dont be embarrased by anything on here we have all done things to get what we neecd that we are not proud of. No one judges anyone on this site as we have all been in the same boat. I have been on diazepam for years but i can take them or leave them as my choice of drug was heroin and believe me we done all sorts to get it or the money to get it. When i was supposed to be cutting down my doctor told me the same come down by 5mg for a couple of weeks to stabilize yourself then another five and so on, but maybe getting the 2mg ones would be easier as it wont be so fast and less likely to cause your panic attacks to come back. If you have to but them in the 5 or 10mg then just cut them into smaller doses. I used my valium to help me come off heroin and they helped a lot.But can i say one thing the more you worry about the panic attacks the more likely you are to have them.I used to have them and thought valium was the answer but honestly theyr not and iv been prescribed them for nearly 20yrs so i do know what you mean, But i would recomend cutting them into smaller doses stabilize for a couple of weeks then down another couple of mgs. Good luck and get in touch anytime. You can do this and remember never be embarrased about anything we have all done silly things

[MrKlown]

Yes I know what I need to do. Regardless of this all I still have panic attacks even while on valiums and I've been told Klonopin is a safer alternative but for some reason they don't work on me either. I'm even going as far as attempting to apply for disability at age 25, it's quite embarrassing. Panic attacks have caused me to quit numerous jobs and not perform very well and it leads people to thinking I am just some lazy bum and hope the disability people don't think that. The thing I found odd was I went to my brother's house yesterday and I was not anxious one single bit which is something I find odd. Is it possible that living here with my parents is causing my anxiety/panic attacks? I love my parents but I do know them not accepting me as a human being and denying my homosexuality completely is causing some of my mental problems though they don't mean to because they do love me.I am just so confused right now.

[luppygirl]

Having dealt with anxiety disorder for a very long time I know a few things about it.  You living at your parents is definitely a trigger for panic attacks.  You might not realize the stress of them not accepting you for who you are is causing you anxiety and causing you to have panic attacks.  Not everything that triggers panic attacks is obvious sometimes you don't even realize that something is stressing you out.  The society we live in is so filled with stress people have gotten used to living with stress, most people probably don't know what not being stressed feels like.  Things that cause panic attacks can be really obvious sometimes but most times it is some underlining thing that is causing it.  You must do what you have to do to try and get rid as much stress as possible or you will always be getting anxiety and panic attacks.  I know easier said then done.  I am still a work in progress, but i keep trying.  I take Lorazepam for my panic attacks.  I don't really know all the difference between drugs but I think it isn't as strong as valium, but if I am wrong someone please correct me.  You can get them starting at .5 mg, 1 mg, 2 mg not sure if it goes higher because i have never seen it but that doesn't mean anything.  Is there any type of group you could go to to discuss your issues about your homosexuality that you are having with your parents.  Talking with people who know what you are going through can work wonders for anxiety.  They must have some place you could go to talk to people.  You have to get rid of the stress I can't emphasis that enough.  I don't know if I was any help but I wish you the best and keep on posting ( you probably can get some of your stress out by venting on here)

[mtgoat911]

mrklown, i have only read your post, so if someone has already said all this, i appoligize, i work at a detox, we do not pull people off benzos without giving them some type of comfort med
i also wanted to let you know that you do not need to abuse your medication to become and addict
your body has formed an addiction to this drug, so you have 2 options, take it for the rest of your life or get off the benzos
i doupt you will be able to collect ssi without being on other medication, i agree with you, sri/anti-depressants can exagerate anxiety in many patients
have you talked to your doctor about ptsd medication? for the problems you described on your thread, the identity stuff, and debilitating panic seroquel would probably work well for you, i would not suggest this drug for typical panic attacks, but you stated that anti-depressants do not work for you and that your life is so unmanageable you cannot work, the next drug class your doctor will probably visit is an anti-psyc....at one point in my life i took seroquel for pts and vistoril for panic....i did gain a ton of weight, then i joined a gym and the weight came off, i also attended 12steps meetings, na, ada, ea
i had to stop the benzos in 04, i could not deal with the affects that comes with using narcotics...hey you never know, you might change your meds around and decide you are ready to go back to work

[MrKlown]

Yes I did try seroquel, viseral, geodon, zyprexa, and many other type of anti-psychotic medications. Seroquel caused sleep paralysis which caused panic attacks, geodon caused heart palpitations which caused panic attacks, zyprexa made me see creatures which caused panic attacks the viseral did nothing period. I do think I need to talk to a doctor about Klonopin though because it has been proven to work long-term and while I know that is switching one benzo for another at least it would be safer in the long run. I don't mind living a life with a benzo as long as it is managed. The fear of not knowing when I will run out for good is what is scaring me and I wasn't lying about my friend at the detox place. He was taken straight off of benzos and went into multiple seizures and while your place may not do that, his did. I don't want to risk that.

[luppygirl]

I would recommend going to the ER if you are ever in the situation were you run out.  They know the risks involved with benzos so I am sure they would help you out.  After all that is what they are there for.  I know the Er has helped me out when it came to needing help with my pain and they didn't give me any problems.  As long as you are honest with them and explain your medical conditions they are pretty good at helping.  Try not to think about the what ifs because those cause alot of stress and stress is not good for anxiety it makes it so much worse.  

[MrKlown]

That is sound advice.

[mtgoat911]

wow, you have tried every pill for anxiety that i can think of, sounds like a program might be your next step
anxiety meds can cause panic attacks, just like pain pills can cause rebound pain
when is the last time you tried to manage your attcks without medication? what happened? what other treatment is your doctor offering you?
i started taking meds for panic when i was 9yrs old, stopped at 29, realized i was better off without the pills, not saying you would be better of without your pills, just wanting to let you know i identify

[MrKlown]

I have tried therapy of many sorts, even hypnotherapy which they could never get me under. I have pretty much tried everything and valiums are the only thing that has ever really worked for me which is why it's hard to give them up.

[luppygirl]

I have read all the posts here and I am not sure if I missed something, but other then fear of not being able to get your meds is your doctor telling you that you have to stop taking them?  If he isn't and these meds truly help you and you aren't eating them like candy why would you go off of them.  Everybody is entitled to live a fairly normal happy life and if this is what it takes then I don't see a problem taking them.  If some of the side effects of the meds are bugging you then try something like lorazepam (i don't think it is a strong as valium ) it might have better effects.  I have been taking it on and off for 12 years and it works well and it works fast. Or maybe a combination of medications might help you out.  I am not a dr so I don't know all that can be used for anxiety disorder. y In my case I have tried many different anti-depressants and none of them work for me, they usually caused the anxiety to worsen and never mind about the other horrible side effects that I got.  I really think you should have a good sit down talk with your doctor and discuss all your fears and such.  He can't read your mind so you must let him know what you want and what you are afraid is going to happen.  It is so important nobodies life should be put on hold like this.  I am sure you have places to go and people to see, so make him listen to what you have to say.  I hope   that I have helped in some small way.  Do what it takes to get your life back.  Take care!

[MrKlown]

I will definitely talk to a doctor once I can afford to go again. That won't be for a while unfortunately. I just signed up full fledged for disability today and am quite shocked at how long she says it usually takes. She said I will probably be denied my first and second attempts and a lawyer will help me get it on the 3rd attempt.

[luppygirl]

Wow I can't believe you have to pay to go to the Drs.  I guess I am so spoiled living in Canada.  The only thing we have to pay for is prescriptions and even then most people have insurance and covers most of that and if you don't have insurance you can claim them on your income tax.  I am a really sick person and I don't know what I would do if i had to pay every time I went to the drs.  I would most likely be dead and that is no exaggeration.  Do they have any free clinics there?  Sorry I really don't know much about the American health care system, I think I know just enough to be happy living in Canada!!!.  Well let us know if you get an appointment ( by the way if you don't mind me asking what does it cost for one drs visit) and if it is taking to long and you don't have the money for the appointment go the ER surely they have to help you whether you have money or not.  Please tell me they do?????

[mtgoat911]

yeah luppy, we pay out our *** to seek medical care, even with insurance the medical bills for our family is too much, last year we pain $500 a month for health insurance and it did not cover everything
the er is a good idea, but as a paramedic i will say the use of americans calling 911 and going to er for non emergency situations has taken away from the emergency needs of ill patients
each state in the USA has a mental health center, i believe this center would be more suitable for MrKlowns needs, we also have free clinics over here, but it takes determination to get into one of them, most people will not take the time to look one up
and most of the clinics do not give patients narcotics, like valuim the drug that mrklown takes
i just have to say, my best friend is a lesbian, her mom is a joho witness, and completly turned her back, my friend just got into art school and is working as an illustrator for a publishing company, her mom does not support her because she is gay, it hurts my friend, but it doen not hinder her life, some things we can change, others we have to move on, and get over it
here is a dailly affirmation book for gay and lesbians, so many do not ger what they need from their family so they find others who can have faith in them, and they also find faith within themselves, i start each of my days reading a book like this, it helps me stay focused and positive through the day, trust me, i have my own issues, anything i say to you is to inspire you to do more for yourself, i was told when i was 18 that i should get on disibility for dibilitating learning disiblitities, i did not, i made a decsion to goto college and take care of myself, it was a turning point for me, heres that link
http://www.hazelden.org/OA_HTML/ibeCCtpItmDspRte.jsp?item=1294
i wish you the best of luck

[luppygirl]

We have such a dr shortage here that many people don't have a family doctor and if you go to the walk in clinics there are a lot of meds that they refuse to prescribe so people here use the emergency almost like a doctors office except you can't make an appointment.  The wait times can be up to 8 hours sometimes.  so you kind of have to weigh whether or not it is worth it.  I lost my family dr last year in Feb and because I have so many things wrong with me the few drs that were taking new patients turned me away because they didn't want to actually deal with a sick person.  I did finally manage to get one in August but until then I had to go to the ER many times and had no choice but to wait.  Sorry that I got off topic.  I did the same thing in another thread.  I hope i don't make anybody mad i will try not to do it anymore.

[steveo30]

maybe where you work, things may be a little different.i will never go to a detox,rehab ever again only because of how they treat the benzo patients.i was on xanax for 8 years at 4 mg's a day,they gave me 20 mg's of valium the first day and 4 days later i was on nothing.i had a seizure 2 days later and they put me on phenobarbitol for 2 days.after that they tried to put me on hydroxine,ya,ok,i'd rather take a placebo,you've got to be kidding me.how can something that can possibly take months to get off of take them 4 days.it all comes back to money unfortunately.how can they expect us to live a clean life when you get that feeling as if no-one cares and let me tell you first hand if your decision is to go into in-patient,know where your going,dont go to some state funded place,they dont give a **** about you,half of them never even smoked a joint how can they possibly understand what we go through,they cant,same with doctors nowadays,the're just there to listen to our ********(according to them) and then they breathe a sigh of relief once there shift is over.anyways mtgoat,i wish i was at the rehab you work at,i just might be clean now...steveo

[mtgoat911]

well steveo, i actually work at a state funded detox, and what you have written about them i dont think you would be open for the one i work at

i have been a detox patient more times than i can count on my fingers and toes put together, i have been in ones that were federally funded and ones that cost my family 30 grand for a 21 day stint, all i can say about that experience is that they all got me off drugs,

one way or another i left clean, well until 2001 then i would leave on methadone or suboxone half the time,

people detoxing off drugs have seizures, its the nature of their addiction, its not the facilities fault, most people who work in a&d tx are in recovery themselves, they care about each patient, but also have to have tough love and boundaries or they would loose their mind!!

you can thank our x president bush for mental health cutts, most facilities are not allowed to keep detox patients for 3 to 6 weeks, they do the best they can with the situation, after all most addicts do not pay their bill or have insurance coverage for long term tx, if klown wants to try inpatient i think its a good thing, but stevo is also correct, you take a chance!

do the risk of seizures in a hospital out weigh the seizures during an at home detox?

to get back to the first post on here maybe this memeber is looking for titration which is the process of gradually adjusting the dose of a medication until the desired effect is achieved

[steveo30]

not that it matters much but i would have to have paid 36,000.00 for 28 days  where i was at,and it was a state funded detox but i make to much money.i left after 8 days because of the problems i already mentioned and ended up paying 8,000.00 cash as they were threatening to freeze my bank account.i understand that people have seisures in detox but if they were treating the individual instead of the disease people wouldn't have to go through this.maybe i expected to much,i realize that theres no way getting around the withdrawals but they could make it a little easier if they knew what they were doing.please remember that i'm talking about ECMC in  buffalo,i'm sure there are many good detox and rehab centers out there,i am just giving my personal experience.   steveo

[steveo30]

i've been thinking lately,probably more like a fantasy than anything else,but i would love to have a AA or NA meeting with you guys,i think that would be awesome.we sit on our chairs and correspond through the internet and you start to develope a bond with community members,we all do i'm sure.just a thought.    steveo

[livia1881]

I am not insensitive to your situation. I am not much older than you and I also suffer from anxiety and panic. At times my anxiety was so bad I was rarely leaving my house. With regards to meds I had similar difficulties - I was buying my meds at one time thru the mail. I got charged with a felony. The law, the cops, judges do NOT CARE if you have a  reason for possessing what you have in your possession they only care if you broke a law. That is all. From reading your posts it sounds to me like you are getting your meds not from a dr but thru some other means. All benzos are controlled substances which means that it is illegal to possess without a prescription. I agree with what another poster said about everyone deserves to live a comfortable life, and no one deserves to have their life put on hold but...please reconsider what you are doing! This is a crime, in my case it was a felony. Do yourself a huge favor and PLEASE go to a dr. or a clinic. If you think your anxiety is bad now, it will become 1,000,000 times worse once you get busted, charged with a crime, and have to go cold turkey off the valium. I had the cops take me to the ER because I was afraid I might have some bad withdrawal from my meds being confiscated. At the ER I told them what I was on and that the cops had taken all my meds and that I was concerned about withdrawal. They didn't give me anything to help me comfortably withdrawal. I don't see any reason not to make someone who is physically dependent on a drug as comfortable as possible. I mean we suffer enough, that's why we need meds. I have since found a great doc. I never have to worry about running out of meds. I can't really afford to a see a doc either but I REALLY cannot afford to be felon. Make some phone calls and see if a doc won't work with you and whatever your income level is. I hope you don't ever go thru what I went thru. It will cost you time, money, and your dignity. Don't chance it.