What do you do when work is a MAJOR trigger?

[Menopause728]

Hey all! I'm almost entering my 4th day clean. I al tolerating the withdrawals okay but my biggest worry is work tomorrow. Don't get me wrong I don't mind work and I'm not stressed there but quite the opposite. I'm bored out of my mind and provides me too much time to think about personal issues. I have taken the pills to make me "zone out" so to speak.
I know I could look for another job but with the economy is horrible, I'm 50 years old and highly doubt I can find work earning what I do.
How do I handle this??

[weaver71]

I just reflect on the big book of AA, when feeling bored, but my job was far from boring. I ended up quitting my job and going back to school in my 40's. I was so scared at first, but I've surrounded myself with recovery and I have found side work and am getting by. When I have my little nervous breakdowns, I reach out to my huge support system, here being part of it. I understand the reinventing yourself for sure, but I keep making breakthroughs. It's much easier to rebuild my relationship with my wife off the pills, even when I'm in a bad space, at least I feel something. There's no such thing as size of problem, crisis is crisis, but having clarity makes them heal rather than simply sit in waiting or fester. I'm not implying you should quit your job, but encouraging you that it gets more clear with sobriety. Sometimes fast, sometimes slow, but it always materializes if we work for it.

[Brightfutureahead]

MedHelp has a menopause forum too. Haven't been on but I know it exists :)  My mom used to complain of low-no energy after her hysterectomy as well.

[Menopause728]

That's a good point "Bright" but I've been a wife and mother so long I really don't know who I am anymore. I'm on HRT and Pristiq, I take vitamins but I still have no energy since my hysterectomy so pursuing any type of interest seems impossible because I have no energy since my hysterectomy except when taking pain pills. :/

[Brightfutureahead]

Maybe your purpose, right now anyways, is to dive into your recovery and get well. The more energy you put into it, the more you get out of it. It can be life-changing... :)

[Menopause728]

I wish I could but I'm in the financial field with very little interaction with people. I can pretty much do my job on autopilot which in turn makes my mind wander to issues in my personal life.
I've read various posts on here and my issues aren't near as severe as others but they are to me. Hitting the fifty mark and menopause, the last child leaving the home and going to Afghanastan, a good marriage I guess (no arguing, etc. but the spark appears to be gone). I've begun to wonder what my purpose is in life, is this it?

[ImDONENoMore]

By doing whatever you can to make the job more interesting.  It's hard to suggest things given that we don't know what you do for a living, but start there.  At this point, given all the time you've had to think about this, you must have some ideas on how to make the job more tolerable?