Dreaming of DOC

[fengirl09]

Just wondering how many of you out there still have random dreams about your past DOCs. I had one of these dreams last night and didn't like it at all. In my dream I was so happy to be getting this drug again and there were no bad consequences. It brought back all those feelings of guilt and shame again and that pissed me off after all the hard work I have done and continue to do to stay sober. I guess my question is... do these dreams ever go away completely, and if they do how long does it take? Any input would help.

Thanks
Vickie

[road2recovery]

I had more dreams when i was using, then when i quit...Those dreams of my DOC were as real as life...Once I dreamed that someone called me late one night and had some, and i told them i would get them in the morning...I called her the next morning, and she is like i never called...I checked my phone and no she had not...That scared the **** out of me, because we had the biggest conversation with that...Normal dreams i have a hard time remembering, But Doc dreams were so vived...and more often
Like cat said I had to remind myself that normal people didn't do this...And how powerfull the mind is, and try to use my mind as a advantage...
now those dreams is finally sound sleep...Good luck
r2r

[CATUF]

I used to think of using dreams as nightmares - I really hated them.  Now i think of them differently.  They are certainly no fun, but they really help with my recovery.  

FIRST, the simple fact that i have a using dream at all reminds me that I AM A DRUG ADDICT - - earth people don't have using/drinking dreams.  So, they say to me "you're not dealing with a few poor choices you made, or bad habits you developed, you're dealing with something that is a part of who you are, how you are wired -- you are not fixed, you have just been granted a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of your recovery."  

That's a very good thing, because if I don't renew my reprieve daily, I am likely to return to active addiction.  I have learned from experience that if my recovery is ignored or put on auto-pilot, it's doomed to failure.

SECOND, using dreams give me a chance to see what the insanity of active addiction is really like.  In my using dreams I immediately return to all the behaviors and ways of thinking that were an inherent part of being active.  I suddenly become focused on getting more, on using more and more, on making sure that I have enough for later, on making plans and excuses . . . I immediately become an isolated lier that looks at people primarily in terms of whether they might assist or hinder my using.  I am transported back to how it was, but I get to see it all with a clean and sober mind. Back then I didn't/couldn't get it, it was just the way it was.  Now I can see it for what it is and be glad that I don't have to live like that anymore.

CATUF
3-3-10

[sadinmichigan]

I agree with star..they are nightmares..I had some terrible ones. I literally woke up choking because in my nightmare the dealer that i bought my extras from was at my house and her and her daughter were holding me down and shoving tons of pills down my throat and they were all broken and scratching my throat..I woke up in a panic..it was terrible. That was one of several..now i just have different ones..nightmares that is..lol

[starfish1963]

Those aren't dreams they are nightmares!

[K Todd]

LOL,

I am on Day 24 from Hydro's and around Day 8-9, I had a dream where I was work, with my old boss....and there were about 10-20 different size Hydro bottles all over the bathroom sink, and counter tops....some were empty and some were full...some had label and some didnt....and in my dream my boss was looking at each bottle, and asked me, "so what do you take this medication for" and in my dream I responded "auh...need them just to function.."

Then I woke up...I had a couple other dreams...but that one was a vivid dream, and to weird for me....glad it passed...LOL to those dreams...bottles of DOC floating around tec...

Good Post Vickie!  (-:

Todd

[gizzy32]

I had so many of those the first month clean, scary ones. I woke up and thought i had used, literally felt high a few times. They do seem to get less intense and don't happen as much after time, but i still get them every now and then. I had one a few days ago and I hate it. It seems now that when i have the odd drug dream, i crave the second i wake up. They are rare now though and another joy in recovery, lol.

[fengirl09]

Thanks to all who replied to my question. I don't feel like such a freak now anyway.LOL  Hopefully my deam won't be back for a long long time.

Much love to all,
Vickie

[12gauge]

Yep.  I'm 5 1/2 months off my DOC.  Last dream I had, I was greeted by my former dealer as, "hey pin holes."  They were referencing my eyes.  Funny, nobody ever called me that in reality.  But I was excited in the dream, and somewhat depressed when I woke up and realized it hadn't happened.  I was looking forward to having my pills back.

I think I may have even scavenged around, hoping to find one that I had stashed for a rainy day.  I realized that I was far too much of a "good junkie" to forget about a pill.

Dreams are one thing that I lost for about the first 3 months.  Of course, I had a terrible bought of insomnia that lasted over 2 months.  So I guess asking for dreams when you're not sleeping is kind of silly.  

[tramaddi]

I am always hunting for a perscription in my dreams...good grief

[dominosarah]

I had alot of them in the early days but they come far and few between now.  Hope it stays that way.  They are no fun.  Just try and shake it off.  stay strong        sara

[Sunnyd210]

I havent had a dream in a while but I have had them. Crazy dreams to about taking pills that I didnt even take before and I didnt even know existed (thanks medhelp lollollol). I was very disturbed over a few of them, but it is normal so dont worry :)

[Kova]

LOL!  i get those dreams sometimes.  i used to get them with cigarettes, too, and that went on for about a year after i quit.  i've only been one month off my DOC so i don't know how long it will go on.  it is just a dream!  silly to feel guilty about it!

Kova