What motivated you the most to stop?

[tramaddi]

I was just wondering why everyone decided to quit My reason is cuz I am expecting a son in January and I suppose I could stand to keep my money, it isn't putting me into debt but still...It would be nice to feel normal again and not frantic over pills

[Shelwoy]

Sick of throwing my money away
Sick of depending on street hustlers to make me feel better
Sick of getting ripped off daily
Sick of never having enough
Sick of lying to my husband
Sick of borrowing money from my kid
Sick of having no memories
just sick and tired of being sick and tired, ya know??

[Kova]

there are no short cuts to Nirvana.  spiritual growth and true happiness take much work and discipline.  the pills are an illusion, a quick fix.

Kova

[tramaddi]

I am tired of feeling soo desperate.  Desperate to get my next refill and space the pills I have left out to make it to that refill.  I think I need to face the fact that life comes with a certain degree of pain and discomfort and that that is normal.  Right now I get small dull headaches cuz I am taking less due to the taper and this makes me want to take more to avoid this but I must stay on the taper to succeed...normal ppl have headaches and they manage to not resort to pain meds to deal w/ them so why can't I???  I guess I was mistaken when I thought taper meant the absense of pain I think if I go c/t them the pain would be more intense and over qiicker than the prolonged pain of the taper but that is probably not a good idea considering the baby.  Sooo I will just have to stick it out and be happy that altho I feel like a desperate fien at least I am not acting on it

[12gauge]

Motivation?  I didn't want to give it up... Well sort of.

My dealer starting freaking out on me.  They were using too.  And using more and more.  I guess they could only get so much and wanted it for themselves.  One day they completely wigged out on me.  I then realized that I'd no longer have a steady supply.  I stopped and thought about all of it.  I realized that I had been on them for so long.  I realized that every moment of my life revolved around whether or not I had pills.  If I did, everything was fine.  If I didn't, or if I was running low, I'd start to panic.  I began to realize that I was living in an alternate reality.  I did a fine job of hiding all of this from my family.  I told only most close friends that would keep my secret.

I really had no choices other than to cut down and quit with what I had or to find it elsewhere.  The problem was that morphine isn't easy to find here.  Heroin would be easier and I knew that would become much more of a problem than I already had.

So, I decided that I was over all of it.  It started out as joy.  It became quite the problem, making sure that I had enough.  My addiction rose to the point to where I couldn't get enough anymore.  I'd have to wait days in between.  I'd have to cut down just to fight withdrawal and not get high.  Those days sucked.  

Even now I don't know what to think of it.  If I had more resources, I would probably still be using.  I guess I'm glad that I'm not.  But I still miss it.  

I do know that I don't ever want to see that withdrawal again.  

I've said it many times and I'll say it again.  Morphine was by far the best, as well as the worst thing that ever happened to me.

[andie15]

My motivation was my marriage and my sanity.  My kids are too young to know what was going on but the strain it was putting on my husband and I was tremendous.  My husband is a very loving and forgiving man and I wanted to show him that I could be better and make a change for us, he tells me every day how proud of me he is, it's nice to have your hard work noticed.  Also, I was screwing up my life by quitting multiple jobs, losing money for us (we have been trying to buy a house for years now) and getting us further in debt.  That had to stop.  And finally my sanity, I knew I had enough of thinking about how many pills I had left, where I was going to get more, how I was going to pay for them.  I have such a load off of my mind now and I don't have to worry about covering up lie after lie.  All I can say is, it is completely worth the pain to get the pleasure of sobriety.  IF YOU WANT THE RAINBOW, YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THE RAIN!

[gizzy32]

I had so many reasons to quit, but none of them were ever enough to keep me clean. Finally after my overdose, i knew it had become life or death for me and that is the reason i am winning this battle for the first time. My motivation was knowing if i did not stop i would not have lasted much longer. It's good to be clean:)

[gizzy32]

I had so many reasons to quit, but none of them were ever enough to keep me clean. Finally after my overdose, i knew it had become life or death for me and that is the reason i am winning this battle for the first time. My motivation was knowing if i did not stop i would not have lasted much longer. It's good to be clean:)

[scaredmommie]

i wonder a lot even to this day why god choose me to be a addict, have you? i sit there sometimes and cry saying god why did you choose me, why, i didnt do nuttin wrong, im not a bad person, i dont hurt no one, so why did you deside to hurt me and make me a addict.

[tramaddi]

I can totally relate to wondering how others manage to live w/out pills and be happy.  I envy those ppl.  I watch my family all the time and my H wakes up feeling just fine every morning and has a productive day.  W/d are so uncomfortable wanting them to stop ruins motivation.  I wonder if I will ever be happy again?  I feel prefectly content when I have them in my system, even tho I am not high I just feel normal and optomistic and can concentrate on things I need to get done and not obsess on the pills.  I hate being a slave to the addiction.  My mood depends on the pills and it is unfair to my family.  I would like to start an antidepressant but since I am pg now is probably not the time.  The depression is the worst of the w/d for me.

[uphill7584]

I would always think about all the great things I was going to do with my life while high...guess what none of them ever happened. When I finally realized how full of BS I was I...how I was getting no where. A lot had to do with it starting to effect my life negatively...bs with trying to get meds, and having to deal with WDs when I couldn't. Just wasn't worth it anymore.

[avisg]

We found out our son had cancer .He needed to have a mommy the was there for him .not a mom that was selfish only thinking about her I made huge changes .I quit smoking the day we forund out

[scaredmommie]

i have a few reasons, one was i just hated needing pills to feel normal, and function everyday. and the others would be i have 3 wonderful children that need there mommy, and a son to be husband(the 28th of this month) who needs me as well. i just wanted to live a normal life. and i wanted to be able to enjoy everything in my life. now thatim on the other side there are so many reason but to sum them all up like i said i just wanted to live a normal life. i hated that every where i went, watching tv, or even just looknig at my family and alli could think was why can i be like them, they can just go through there day enjoying life, being able to just get up and start there day, or go to bed with nothing on there mind, not having pills on there mind 24/7 having to take pills just to get out of bed, or to go to bed, or to just have a normal day. once it got to that point for me, i knew i wanted to stop.

xoxoxo
<3 chrissy

[GoingToMakeIt]

Not having your life controlled by something.
Not damaging your body and mind anymore.
Being 'you' again.

"When your desire to get clean, is stronger than your desire to use. Then, you will get clean" GTMI