Questions about withdrawals from tapering

[Theblondeonetx]

Okay...so those who know me know that I have been taking around 20 vicodin (10/500s) for the last 2 years and before that around 10-12 vicodin for 2 years before that a day and the two years prior to THAT, I was taking about 10 a week. I have tried to quit cold turkey in the past which only lasted for about 3 days, ONLY because I had Tramadol to help take away the withdrawal symptoms. The mental urges and depression took over and I gave in. Well the past week I ended up buying some norco from my usual guy who bought them from someone who bought them online...(sorry for the confusion)...anyway, they ended up being fakes and since I worked for 2 years as a pharmacy tech I knew right away that something about these wasn't right. But since it was all I had and I trusted my guy (he didn't know himself, he was taking them too) I took 3 and the only effect from them was light headedness and my heart pounded for about 30 minutes. This was a week ago and it scared me so bad that I finally want off...like REALLY want off these damn things. SO...since my guy is out of town til monday and I only have so many I dropped from about 17 a day to 15 a day and began to taper from that. I am now down to 11 (yesterday) and plan to take 11 for 3 days then drop to 10.5 for 3 days etc...I know this is a quick taper and I know that withdrawals will still be bad but since I've always had the tramadol to hide them and I don't know I'm scared.

I used to take 2 or 3 pills at a time about every hour. Now I'm taking 2 or 3 at a time every 3 hours no less. Yesterday my heart was pounding, I was nauseated within 30 minutes after taking the pills even with food, I'm short of breath and my right arm feels tight. Last night I could not sleep even after taking 3 somas, I was constantly hot with chills then freezing and drenched in sweat. My glands under my ears are not swollen but are hurting, not like I have the flu, but more like the feeling you get after eating sweet tarts. I'm weak and burst out crying for no reason. I keep dwelling on how bad I hurt my loved ones while I was having fits due to too many pills and I think my blood pressure is up. I have hot flashes where all the blood rushes to my face and I feel hot, yet chilly at the same time. BUT I'm also on my menstrual cycle..toward the end and usually by this time the PMS symptons have subsided but since I've never really experienced bad withdrawals I'm not sure whether...It's actually withdrawals from cutting back to quick...from my period...or because I'm freaking out after taking those "mystery" pills last week. My boyfriend seems to think that if the 3 "mystery" pills were deadly that I would have already been in the ER. I do not have insurance and the doctors probably wouldn't be able to tell if any liver damage or out of whack blood work is from the addiction or the fake pills.

Is this normal what I am experiencing? The funny thing is mentally I'm not craving the pills too bad. I do think about them but I'm so freaked out about my health now that fear of them has replaced the want for them. (which maybe the fakes were for a reason??) I have had 6 so far today. Usually by this time I have had well over 10. When my guy gets back in town he will be replacing the 60 fakes for real ones and I will continue my taper until I'm off, but is a racing heart and shortness of breath normal for withdrawals? It's not so bad I cannot function but it's bothering me.

This is the first time in my life I have felt HATE for this drug. Yes I have suffered from severe depression but the anxiety over my health is beginning to make the pill depression just as bad now and I want to try again clean. If the depression turns suicidal again, I will deal.

The point of all the rambling is...are these symptoms normal for tapering withdrawals? Thanks

[dominosarah]

How are you feeling now?

[avisg]

yeah sounds like anxiety.... fear of what you know is coming ....your mind is a very powerful thing try to relax its ok if you need to take longer brakes between jumps 7 days may work better for you ....

[vicki595]

Hi~  I'm sure the mystery pills are out of your system now.  It sounds to me like you have HIGH ANXIETY.  You've worked yourself up. Try to calm down. Continue your taper.I hope it works. Get to some NA meetings,okay?
Keep posting and let us know how you are...
Vicki

[Theblondeonetx]

No I'm tapering with the real ones. The fakes are I don't know what. I only took 3 of those when I first got them just to see what they were.. Yeah I know... Stupid move. It just scared me so bad about what those fakes could have really been that I'm somehow thinking the withdrawal symptoms could really be that I'm dying from the fake pills. I'm really good at convincing myself of something so bad that I'll actually believe or feel it.

What ***** is that I don't have insurance or the extra $500 for a visit to the ER so a doctor can tell me how dumb I am for taking a pill bought online and how I need to get off the real painkillers...then send me home feeling no better than I was before I went in. If it gets worse I'll go see a dr.

[gnarly_1]

HI what your feeling is the minor withdrawals and anxiety from tapering ..it can wake you up pritty quick....It sounds like your really sincere about quiting this time...let me tell you
in the end when it is all said and done it will be one of the best moves in you life...I had a long drown out taper off methadone  it took 8 1/2 mo but I got 174 clean days now and it is so so worth the pain and withdrawals you suffer tapering down..I dont think there is a comfortable way to get off narcotics its a grind anyway you do it but by tapering down your final withdrawal wont be as sever ...tapering takes a lot of will power and perseverance some people can do it others cant ..hence is why so many go C/T..but it sounds like you have a plan...I tapered at 10% every 72hours and it worked well for me..its fast for methadone but we realy cant give advise on here about tapering any more in the open forum if you like p/m me and I will try to help you thew this difficult time ...good luck and God bless....Gnarly  

[kajama]

I know alot of what you are saying is part of withdrawing, i know with me I do have hypertention so my bloodpressure did rise alot when I was withdrawaling with the hot and cold flashes. Now I have only been addicted for a year and now I am 9 months clean. I also read that buying them off the internet can be dangerous, Some people put dangerous things in them including rat poison and different drugs that are cheaper. Now most of my info I got off the internet when i was looking to buy them and it scared me so I didn't do it. Now as far as them being deadly, I am not sure but do know they can make you really sick, now if you go to ER even if no insurance they have to treat you and stablize you, they won't refuse you, they would probley do blood work and then could tell you what you have been taking. So hope this helps.

[LeaAnn807]

Yes.  I had the rapid heart rate.  No shortness of breath.  If your arm is hurting and you are having these symptoms and feel something isn't right, you should be checked, in my opinion!  You could just be having anxiety, but it is something that you would bet your life on?  It could be something else.

I hope you feel better soon!

TH

[vicki595]

So.. are you tapering with the "fake" pills??? Or what are you tapering with?