I think I may need help..

[cd1005]

I had surgery for 3 herniated discs in my neck a  year and a half  ago. I was taking vicodin for 3 months prior to surgery, and 3 months post surgery. I stopped on my own. I recently had my first baby, and had an emergency c-section.... and back on the vicodin. Only took them for 2 weeks post op. Now, my neck and arm pain is back bad, and I am taking 6-7 5/500 vicodin a day. My pills are gone, and I can pick up my refill in 2 hours.... I HATE that I am in all this pain, and feel I NEED these. It seems I go through this every time there is a legit Medical reason for me to be on them.... I guess I just don't know what to do. Sometimes I feel like the vicodin help me get through the day..... please help.

[toxictome]

Welcome to the forum.This is a great place to get help and support!! I agree with avis..if you want to quit...we're here to support you. If you'e not sure if you have a problem...stick around and keep reading the posts...I'm sure you'll find your answer.

To: verdigo,psyche,CGR  
YOU are not losers...you have an addiction. It's time to stop feeling guilty and ashamed..you are here trying to help yourselves. So, turn off the a** kicking machine and be gentle w/ yourselves...you are taking the right steps...be proud of your courage to change the things you can...
TOGETHER WE CAN!!!!!

[CGR76]

I also wanted to share my thought on this subject. Unfortunatly I too became addicted to pain pills, and I also started taking the for lagitimat reasons. But like most people here I became dependant on them, and like Verdigo said I loved the person I was when I was on the pills. I could do anything, or do nothing, but it was alright. I could work for hours, do chores around the house play with my boys. I was never grumpy or mad, just an alround good guy that every one loved.
One day just recently, I was having kind of a bad weekend so I went on bindge. I must have taken about 30 or 40 on saturday and around 25 on sunday. Thats when I realized that I had a huge problem, when I looked in the mirror, I saw a dead man staring back at me. I felt pathetic, I felt like a looser. The pills no longer made me that all around greate guy. Now I am on a taper program, and even though I am working tourds quiting, every time I have to take a dose, I get that same feeling of being a looser for depending on a pill just to function.

If pain is the real reason for being on meds, and you just cant tolerate the pain without meds, then you have to meassure the consicuencas with the benifits. But keep to the perscribed dose.

well, take care, and let us know how you are doing. CGR...,

[AlessandrasMom]

I wanted to share my thoughts with you also since I had my first child, a little girl, 8 months ago via an emergency c-section.  I've been on painkillers ever since.  I have nerve damage in my legs because of the c-section and have relied on Norcos ever since to relieve the pain.  It became a big problem and I was up to almost 15 per day.  Eventually the painkillers stopped working for my pain and I found that I had to pop at least 4 just to get out of bed in the morning to lead a "normal" life.  I know what you mean when you say they help you get through the day.  That's exactly how I felt (and still feel) since I'm only on day 4 of withdrawals.  I felt a lot of pressure from the people around me to keep up appearances, lose the baby weight, keep the house pristine, raise my daughter, work full time.  I thought the pills were helping me cope with everything and in the end I realized they were just ruining my life.  I'm still very confused and now very depressed because I let myself get like this.  Like I said, I'm on day 4 of withdrawals, so if I'm not making sense, I'm sorry.  I feel like I'm in a very dense fog today.  

[verdigo]

Hi, just thought I'd share my thoughts,to help you understand better what you are facing. When you start running out of the pills early and waiting on your refill you are starting to chase the buzz. Of course you need the pain relief but your also enjoying the high it gives you. Don't feel bad, Its a great feeling. You feel great when you are on them, like you can do anything, talk to anyone. They make you feel like a positive person, all the things you wish you could be and do on your own without the pills. But then they start to wear off and you are arguing with yourself on wether you should take a little more to get the feeling back and everytime you do that you make your tolerance go up and you addiction a little worse.....the best advice I can give is tell yourself. "These pills are fooling me" Because before long you won't know the real you and you will become dependant upon the "vicodin you" which is a fun loving,care free, worry free everything is a ok person." I'd say if you are not sure what to do and you are taking them for pain and not chasing the buzz then, take them exactly as your doc tells you and if they do not kill the pain tell your doc that the dose you are on is not killing pain. Let the doc control your dose don't take as you want to but follow the doc's direct instructions. If you don't follow the exact prescription instrusctions and you are running out early. I'd say you are playing with fire and you are deffinently going to get burned .
Take if for a guy who has been there chased it and chased it and now I am all the way up to oxycodone aka percocet 100mg a day and am at the point of not chasing the buzz but chasing feeling normal.
Please take as directed and if they don't work let the doctor do what he is paid for and take care of your pain managment. I hope my rambling and past exp helps you.
Take care
Verdigo

[avisg]

I think you are standing on the engde of addiction and you could go either way .......I would stop now .....however it is up to you ,hun.