Middle of night and start of Day #7 clean

[chronicmistake]

Waking up in the middle of the night and I have this feeling of emptiness inside.  If I felt this before I would take a couple of Norco and feel better.  I miss how the pills would make me feel,  like I was wrapped up tight in a blanket and I felt safe and the Meds filled me up, like after eating a good meal.  NO, this does not mean I want to go and get some pills of the street or relapse.  There are no medications in my house, oh except some tylenol.  I just have to rewire my brain and change my habits.  

I saw my doctor today who was very proud that I came off the opiates myself and have set up a after care program myself.  I do want to get better and stay that way but I know this is going to be more work than my thesis.  This is a for life.  Is this going to be a life time of struggle?  or just a new way of living and thinking?  Working the steps?  I know there are going to be good moments and hard moments.  Just needed to get this off my chest.

[pillfree21]

You said a mouthful...this is a really difficult part of the process...especially knowing that we are fortunate, but not really being able to feel the inner satisfaction.  I can only go forward believeing that things get better and it all comes back in time.  Good Luck and hang in there.

[Tab57]

Don't depair as you are doing great. Addiction is a lifetime struggle as each day is a new day.

Break down your day into manageable segments such as 2 hour blocks of time, or whatever works for you. Just focus on getting through that block of time and no longer of a time period than what you set up.

Pleas seek out NA meetings if you have not already done so. Talking to others with simliar problems is very good for the soul. In addition you can exchnage ideas as far as an after care is concerned.

Keep up the great work and keep posting.

[janet19]

You have got yourself in a place where you will have lots of good moments. Just wrap that soft blanket around your body and dream of something that is beautiful. At least you are laying down resting your body. That beautiful thing you are thinking about can become brighter and more beautiful as you keep a clear head. Hang in there sleep is great, but just resting your body is good also. I am also having bad insomnia and I have been spending nights on here. Good luck and shut those eyes a dream away.