im soo frustrated!

[bettermomma]

Ugh... (sigh) I'm so frustrated right now!

Here's the thing... I can't change my phone number due to the type of work my hubby does, if something were to happen (god forbid) to him or at the place he works. They have to notify me.

So this my problem. I'm 58 days sober. Dr says I'm still in wd. Idk to be honest, I feel fine somedays, then a lot of days here lately, I feel like jumping off a cliff. Theoretically speaking. Why can't I get over this?

Another thing is, my number has to remain the same, but after I tell my dealers that I don't do subs anymore, the next script rolls around and they come calling... OMG! Why can't these money hungry @$$es leave me alone! I know I can do this but man... what the heck?!

[littlebit667]

glad you found a solution to the phone calls!  Keep it up!! It shows you are really trying to stay clean!  Great work!!!!!

[bettermomma]

Thanks elmijack... I'm proud of myself for sure, just somedays less than others... but it's all a part of my journey I guess. Anyways, thanks for the support all of you. It's greatly appreciated!

[Elmijack15]

58 sober!!!! That is truly amazing and you should be very proud of yourself! Not everybody can do it so you're way ahead of alot of us here! The house will get cleaned eventually when you feel like it, one day at a time. Right now your focus should be on YOU and what a marvelous thing you've accomplished. Hang in there, you did the right thing by blocking those numbers they'll leave you alone soon enough!  Tell your hubby to hang in there, that you'll have plenty of energy real soon, but you staying sober is your number one priority right now, good luck to you and congrattulations on doing the right thing!!! :-) smile

[bettermomma]

Lol thanks Kitty, I'll keep that in mind! Lmao

And if I figure out how to call the cleaning fairies, I'll definitely let everyone know! Lol

And about the taking things out of room that don't belong... lol funny you mentioned that! Lol I've done that all day! Funny how we all think alike!

But that you all for your advice, suggestions, and support! I really needed it today! Hugs!


Thanks
Momma

[Bkitty]

They will leave ya alone,,,eventually. Eventually they will tire themselves out calling with no answer or response. Keep ignoring them and everytime that # pops ups give them the middle finger and hit reject! Well,,thats what I would do. LOL

[jlannspr]

I found a tip online about cleaning. It said when you leave a room take something from there that doesn't belong. For example, when you leave the bedroom take a dirty cup and drop it off in the kitchen. Then when you leave the kitchen, take any dirty towels and drop off in laundry. Then back to bedroom for rest...because us recovering addicts are wore out by then!!

haha, keep up the hard work and smile, even if it's to yourself.

[IwillDoThis]

now if you discover the magic word to make the cleaning fairies come - be sure to let me know!

[IwillDoThis]

good girl - you can do it!  Step by step!  I'm so glad you investigated that call blocking feature - with my provider you have to pay $5 per month block any calls which is so frustrating - glad to hear there was an easy fix!  See one less thing to deal with now!  :)  

[texaslady68]

You are welcome!! If there is a will, there is usually a way!

[bettermomma]

Thank you all soooooooo much!

Called my service provider, and since I have an android phone, I downloaded an App for free, that blocks whatever numbers you choose. Love it! It even blocks 800 numbers and other one's like that!

And I'm trying as hard as I can to be patient... just seems hopeless at times. Lol but I know it will get better... it has to, cuz I'm gonna let it get worse again! Thank you all for you suggestions, they really did help!

Don't worry y'all, I'm taking it, as it comes...

Momma

[minn66]

Oh, I know how it is about feeling like doing anything after work, especially cleaning house! Just do what you can and realize it takes time. I am thinking of you and hoping you have a better day. :) I definitely understand.

[texaslady68]

momma,

Call your service provider and ask them how to block numbers. I know this can be done.  Girl, I am at Day 71 and still want to jump off a cliff some days. lol

[IwillDoThis]

Girl - be gentle with yourself and don't beat yourself up.   You, your mind, body and spirit are going through a lot.  You CAN handle it and you CAN get through it - it ain't easy.  I'm having good days, bad days but every day I continue is a victory.  

It really ***** that people don't do their job but I get where you are coming from now and understand why you can't change the number.  Do you have caller id or can you get a machine that answers the calls?  Just trying to think of a way where you don't have to take calls you don't want but I imagine just seeing the number is enough to trigger you and something you don't want to be faced with.  I'm so sorry it can't be easier.

Just know momma that you have come so far, we didn't get ourselves into this overnight and remember to have patience with yourself, don't beat yourself up.  My house is not how I want it right now either but with my back pain I just can't do anything about it right now - it frustrates me but what can I do?

Keep plugging ahead and know you have lots of support here!

[Charetti]

My caller is my own sister!  She just doesnt seem to understand how hard it is to say no.  I guess she wants company in her own addiction.

[bettermomma]

Thanks for your replies. I just wanna give up sometimes, but I have so much to lose that I can't bare the thot of using like that again.

The reason I can't change my number is because the idiots in the office at the coal mine, don't do their job. The have it figured if the write something down once, that it's always gonna be that way. Idk... I have a lot to say to those ppl.... but I don't for my husband's sake.

Anyway about the tapping the phone part... I've tried that already and these ppl just don't give a crap.

[bettermomma]

I wanna just scream! It doesn't matter what I do... it's like I'm doomed to be a using addict forever. I mean, I even snapped at my hubby lastnight laying in bed! I told him to get off my case about the cleanliness of our house. I don't feel like doing anything. Then he brought up every demon I've ever had... that's when I flipped out! The last thing I said to him was that those are my demons alone... if I choose to, I should be able to bury them... Idk what is wrong with me. I'm taking my vitamins and all my meds. Is this a sign that I can't handle life or what?

[IwillDoThis]

Can you tell them "my phone is being monitored and you are being recorded every time you call - please do not call me again" maybe scare them into thinking your phone is tapped?  That might sound crazy but being how you cannot change your number that is the only solution I can think of - make them scared to call you if it doesn't put you in danger.

I am struggling with feeling crappy lately also wondering when it will get better.  I'm 34 days and going through a rough patch of feeling awful.  I take it day by day and just get through each day.  Logically I know I won't take pills again but emotionally this is painful.

Guard your time and do whatever you need to do to stay sober.  Why can't you change your number and just give your husbands work the new number to contact you - I guess I didn't understand that part.

Hang in there - Lulu made a good post today about it taking 90 days to make a habit and we can't expect it to take any less to break a habit.  I just keep looking forward to the day when I feel better.  

[zoea]

Hun with the mobile thing i am in the same situation. Exactly same.
I've been getting text. My belly goes over etc.
We can do this x
hugs Zoe x